Paul Anka's Legacy
by deepfriedcake
Summary: Sometimes it takes a shove from the universe to get back on the right track.
1. Un-Wedding Day

**Author's Notes: **_Paul Anka's Legacy_ was a big deal for me. Before this story, I'd only written one-shots, and they were happy, romantic tales. Committing myself to writing this one took a leap of faith that I could pull off the dark, angst-ridden story I'd envisioned, and also that I could force myself to see it through to the end. Fourteen chapters later it was done, to my relief, but yet I was very glad that a couple of writing buddies had convinced me to give it a try. The story starts on the day that should have been Lorelai and Luke's wedding day, June 3rd. They haven't started to heal yet from their break-up. They're angry, disappointed in each other, and disappointed in themselves, too. This story takes them through the next year of their lives as they try (with a little help) to get back to where they never should have left. I'm sure I'm going to be really tempted to edit a lot of stuff in these chapters, because I've learned an awful lot about writing since this one was created, but I'll try my best to let it remain close to what it was. As always, thanks for your support. And remember, I love hearing your thoughts!

* * *

**Un-Wedding Day**

Lorelai breathed a sigh of relief as she pulled the Jeep into its customary parking spot under the tree at her house. She hunched her aching shoulders over the steering wheel for a moment, trying to loosen the soreness that had accumulated from the strain of the day. She knew it had to be nearly eleven by now. This awful day was finally nearing its end.

She'd made sure she was scheduled to work today and she had deliberately given other members of the staff the day off, just to ensure that she would be so busy she couldn't sit around and brood. She'd insisted that Sookie take the day off. There was no way she could handle Sookie looking at her with those big, sad eyes today.

June 3rd. Her un-wedding day.

The plan had worked, almost too well. She'd been so busy with check-ins, a major linen crisis and a dozen other minor disasters that she'd had no time to agonize over the lives and hearts she'd destroyed. She could only do, not think, which was the only way she could cope right now.

She'd run home sometime during mid-afternoon, just long enough to check on Paul Anka and trade the ill-advised purple strappy sandals for some black ballet flats. Otherwise she'd been in non-stop mode all day.

Sighing, she pulled herself up the porch steps, fumbling for the key. Yes, she locked the doors now. She had suddenly become aware that she was a woman alone, and long nights of no sleep had amplified noises and creaks in her old house until fear had become a new roommate.

In so many ways, she barely recognized herself anymore.

She leaned against the door for a moment, fitting the key into the lock. She hoped that by the time she took a shower, looked through the mail, and gulped a glass (or two) of wine, the day would be done. She was so tired. Maybe she'd be able to sleep tonight in her bed, like a normal person, instead of on the couch with the TV droning in the background for company.

The second the door swung open, though, she knew something was wrong. Everything inside the house was quiet and still in a way that felt like nothing had ever been alive in there, ever.

She held her breath, tip-toeing towards the living room, her heart pounding.

The moonlight mixed with the faint glow from the slightly pornographic monkey lamp shining out from the desk was enough to illuminate the little gray-white lump lying by the fireplace.

Lorelai found herself kneeling beside her pet, her shaking hands clutching his fur.

"No, no, no!" she whispered frantically. "Not today! Oh, please, God! No! Not today! Please!"

Paul Anka was stiff and cold, his head lying on an old sock of Luke's he'd found under the bed a few weeks ago and had refused to give up. Lorelai stroked his coarse fur blindly for a few minutes, unable to believe he was really gone. She leaned her head against the wall, totally numb. She couldn't think. She couldn't think what to do.

Her hand fumbled in her pocket and pulled out her phone. Flipping it open, she pushed a number automatically.

"Yeah? It'd better be good." His voice was rough in her ear, and it was only then that she realized what she'd done, but even so the shock she was in left her unable to commandeer the situation. She stumbled on, helplessly.

"I…I walked in the house," she started to babble, not even realizing she was crying, "and I found him, and…"

"Lorelai?"

"…and I don't know what to do; I can't think, and…"

"Are you OK?"

The sharp concern in his voice suddenly brought her back around and she took a needed breath. "I'm sorry." She took another deep breath and swallowed down some tears. The huge wrongness of what she'd just done in calling him finally caught up to her. "I just couldn't think about what to do, and I guess I called you instinctively, you know? But I'm sorry. I'll handle it. Go…Go back to sleep. Sorry," she whispered.

"Lorelai, what—"

She clicked the phone shut.

She leaned her head back against the wall and let the tears run silently down her face. She was just too tired to sob.

* * *

It's amazing how fast you can do anything when you have to. Luke found himself pulling up to Lorelai's house—"_Our house_," his brain still noted—in under five minutes. He'd pushed his feet into some sneakers and grabbed his keys and ran. There was never any question of whether or not he'd come. After all, it was Lorelai.

It would always be Lorelai.

He figured it was some huge, hairy spider or something along that line that had her spooked, but he knew he'd never get back to sleep without checking on her. He was secretly thankful to have an excuse to see her, because since that gut-wrenching night in front of the frozen food case she'd done a thorough job of hiding herself from him. He told himself constantly that he hated her, hated what she'd done, hated the hollow achiness in his chest that she'd placed there. But yet his eyes searched for her brown curls outside the diner's windows continually.

He dashed for the porch, jiggling the keyring, ready to access the key to the front door. Somehow he kept forgetting to get it back to her. He hurried up the steps and saw that not only was the door unlocked, it was standing ajar. For the first time all of the awful things Lorelai could have encountered entered his mind. His heart leapt to his throat as he silently pushed the door open.

"Lorelai?" he ventured, very quietly. Thinking he sensed movement, he made his way into the living room.

"Ah, no," he muttered, taking in the scene. "Ah, hell no."

He dropped instinctively to his knees beside her, one hand clasping her shoulder, the other laying on top of hers tangled in Paul Anka's fur. He saw his sock under the little guy's head and the guilt hit him full-force.

Luke and Paul Anka had bonded during countless nights on the couch, waiting on Lorelai to come home, Luke's hand scratching behind doggie ears until they both fell asleep 'watching' Sports Center. He'd soon discovered that the dog wasn't nearly as neurotic as Lorelai insisted he was, and Luke then treated him like a dog, for which Paul Anka was grateful. He'd enjoyed many games of fetch played with a pair of Luke's balled-up socks and thought that Frisbee in the backyard was a special treat. Lorelai had often pouted that "Paul Anka likes Daddy best," and Luke had kept the truth a secret, which was the turkey burger leftovers he occasionally brought home. Luke had even on several occasions, (although he would never admit this, even under torture), made one of Rachael Ray's doggie recipes for Paul Anka. So it was with a pang of agony that Luke realized he hadn't given a thought to poor Paul Anka since the spectacular explosion of their relationship. Of course the dog would miss him.

"Poor little guy," he said gruffly, squeezing Lorelai's hand under his.

"It's my fault," Lorelai mumbled, her head still resting against the wall. "It's all my fault."

"Lorelai, no, of course not," Luke said reasonably.

She nodded, pulling her head upright, but not looking at him. "It is. It's my fault. It's all my fault, Luke. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry!"

"It's nobody's fault," he said, still calm, trying to tamp down the hysteria he sensed flowing from her. He kept his voice low and deep and gentle. "It's just one of those sad things that happen in life."

"It didn't have to happen. If I'd been here for him today, instead of running around like a crazy person, trying to ignore what I've done, maybe…Maybe—" Tears choked off the rest, and she struggled to get a breath.

"Lorelai," he started, again.

"My fault, Luke, my fault! It's my fault! My fault! I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry! I'm so sorry!" Lorelai put those two phrases on repeat like a bad episode of 'Whose Line' and Luke soon realized that the words were no longer really about Paul Anka.

As she reached an even higher level of hysteria, Luke stood and hauled Lorelai up to her feet too, pushing her with his hands on her shoulders out of the room, towards the stairs, away from the little body.

"My fault! My fault!" she continued to cry out, her palms flat against his chest, tears still running down her face.

"It's OK. It's OK," Luke kept murmuring to her, even as he felt his own panic starting to consume him because of his inability to comfort her. Her wild eyes darted around the room while her hysterical keening reached an even higher pitch. Luke flashed to hundreds of TV scenes where someone always slapped a hysterical person across the face to bring them around, but no way could he ever do that to Lorelai. At a loss at how to calm her down, he did what he had always wanted to do with Lorelai: He wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her to him.

"Don't think," he pleaded with her, his mouth murmuring against her ear. "Don't think," he insisted again, his mouth now traveling over her cheek. "Don't think," he all but begged, his mouth hovering over hers.

"Don't think," she agreed breathlessly, and that slight movement was enough to bring their lips together.

Once their lips touched there was no going back.

Luke realized that 'don't think' was a perfect mantra for both of them. Don't think about the pain, the hurt, the betrayal. Just revel in the warmth of the touches, the electricity in the kisses, the love that was still there no matter what.

They wrestled each other up the stairs. Clothes were discarded and eventually they all disappeared. Luke kept his arms around her as they sank to the bed.

"I love you," Lorelai whispered. "I love you. I love you, Luke." Every time her mouth was free she whispered those words, over and over. It was plain that if this was her last chance, she wanted him to hear. She wanted him to know.

Afterwards Luke pulled a sheet over them and held her around her waist, pulling her against him as they shifted towards sleep. Just as Lorelai was about to drift off, she heard his whisper, so low that it could have been just a wisp within a dream she'd once had.

"I love you, too," he said.

Everything within her wanted to cry out at that, but she held herself still, and tried to ignore the two tears that managed to squeeze out from under her tightly closed lids. She regulated her breathing to his and soon both of their bodies gratefully slid over into sleep.

* * *

Lorelai gradually woke up to bright sunshine filtering across the bedroom.

_It's OK,_ she told herself, lying there perfectly still. _You didn't expect him to be here. No matter what, he wouldn't still be here. So it's OK. It's fine. You're not expecting anything._

She remembered feeling his arms sometime during the night, insistently tugging her to him again. She'd turned to him blissfully and their lovemaking that time was much softer and gentler, much more appropriately dream-like.

For a few moments more she laid there alone, cataloging all of the feelings and touches and words she could remember, depositing them where she could go and visit them when she was missing him again.

Suddenly impatient, she swung her legs over the bed and started grabbing up items of clothing scattered about, shoving her long legs and arms through openings. She snatched open the door, pausing, praying for just a sniff of bacon frying in the kitchen.

The air was unscented. The house was still, with that same overwhelming silence that had hit her so hard last night.

She made her way down the stairs slowly, dreading what she was going to have to see in the living room. But when she stepped into the room, there was nothing there.

Nothing except for a note with 'Lorelai' on the front of it, folded so it would stand up on the mantle.

Luke always half-printed his words, finishing up in cursive, as though the printing was taking too long. She let her fingers trace over the letters of her name that he'd written there.

She sank down on the couch and flipped open the paper.

_Lorelai,_ he wrote.

_I don't mean to be taking this over, but I couldn't stand thinking about you having to deal with it all this morning. I wrapped him in his blanket, and I'll drop him off at the vet's. You can go there later and make arrangements. I found an empty box and I put all of his stuff in it and stashed it in the hall closet. It's probably on top of the 'Luke Box' if I know you._

She felt a smile quiver onto her lips at his attempt at humor.

_I feel like I should say something about last night. I'm not going to say I'm sorry. We ended so abruptly a month ago that there was no opportunity to say goodbye. I hate the word 'closure' as much as I do the word 'vibe' but it was good to have the chance to be with you one more time. I'm just sorry it was because of Paul Anka._

_If you decide to bury him or anything like that, I'd appreciate it if you'd let me be a part of it._

_Luke_

It was then that Lorelai realized that somewhere, deep down inside, she had been harboring a teeny, tiny, miniscule particle of hope that somehow, sometime, Luke would forgive her and they'd still get their middle, that the fairy tale of Luke and Lorelai would still come true. She didn't realize that the hope was there until it crumbled away and she sat frozen on the couch, knowing that she was still breathing and her heart was still beating, but unable to feel anything at all.

* * *

A few hours later Lorelai found herself stumbling down the street towards the diner. Earlier she'd called Rory and Sookie with the sad news, pulled herself together as best she could, and made the dreaded stop at the vet's. All that was left was stopping to see Luke. The numbness that shrouded her was a blessing now.

Just as she fumbled open the door she realized she could have phoned him with the burial update. It still felt normal to come and see him; to pull open the door and hear the bells cheerfully herald her arrival. With her heart thudding against a layer of ice in her chest, she plastered on what she hoped looked like a smile and walked into what had once been her refuge.

Luckily Gypsy and Andrew were the only locals present, and they sat at the table furthest from the counter, seemingly oblivious to her arrival. She spotted the bill of his baseball cap—_Black? Why in the world was it black?_—out of her peripheral vision and aimed herself that way, locking her focus on the first 'L' of the "No Cell Phones" sign. If she could just somehow avoid looking at him, seeing his eyes, she could maybe get through this.

She grabbed hold of the counter and bobbed her head, hoping she was bobbing towards him. "Hey, Luke, I wanted to say…"

Her mind froze. Why hadn't she planned this out better? There was nothing she could say that wasn't going to sound filthy, considering what had gone on between them last night. _Thanks for coming? Thanks for being with me? Thanks for your comfort in my time of loss?_

"I wanted to say…" She tried again. "Thanks." She thought that was safe. "Yeah. Thanks." She was still doing the head-bob thing. She raised a hand up to her forehead, trying to physically force herself to stop.

"You don't need to thank me. I was glad I could help." His voice was gruff, but she could hear the sincerity in his tone. Her ears wanted to cry.

"So, Rory's coming home on Saturday," she willed herself to continue. "We thought we'd bury him then. Around two. If you wanted. Just, you know, you said…"

"Sure. Of course. I'll be there," he confirmed.

She nodded again, but this time with reason, and turned to leave, thankful that the ordeal was all but over.

But suddenly her hand was on fire. She looked to see why, and saw his hand on top of hers.

"Listen, why don't I just stop at the vet's and bring him home with me? That way you don't have to go through it," he urged with kindness.

The fire from his hand was slowly inching its way into the rest of her body, reminding her of their closeness from the night before. Her heart caught hold of his use of the word 'home' and was slowly twisting it deeper into its chambers. She was powerless to stop her head from rising up and crashing into his clear blue eyes. The numbness was wearing off.

"Sure," she whispered without thought. "That'd be great. Thanks."

Desperate now, she turned and left the diner, her head and shoulders straight in the way she'd been taught to carry herself. She didn't look back. She walked down the steps, down the street, always looking straight ahead. She veered off down the alley behind the second porcelain unicorn shop, hiding herself as much as she could behind the dumpster there. Then she pressed her hands tightly over her mouth, because today she had enough strength to sob.


	2. No Weddings and a Funeral

**Author's Note**: Let me reassure everyone about how much I love, love,_ love_ Luke and Lorelai. I promise to always take good care of them. But with that being said, please remember that this story is beginning barely a month after _Partings_. Both of them are still very hurt, confused, and lost. Nothing's happened yet to break those weird pod-shells that had them trapped and acting like idiots during the end of season 6. Getting them back on track and dealing with some issues that the show swept under the rug is what this story's all about. The first couple of chapters are filled with a lot of sadness and anger, but slowly it all gets better. Trust me, OK? Paul Anka did not die in vain!

* * *

On Saturday Luke parked his truck on the street, behind the Prius and the Jeep pulled in the drive. He saw the girls sitting shoulder-to-shoulder on the glider on the porch, their heads touching. He gave a half-hearted wave at them, which Rory returned. With a sigh he got out and went around to the truck bed.

Rory walked over to greet him but Lorelai stayed frozen at the bottom of the steps.

"Hey, Luke," Rory said, kindly but warily. "It's really nice of you to do this."

"Sure," he shrugged. He bit down on his desire to say something like, _Well, after all, Paul Anka was family._ He sighed again, and leaned over into the bed to pick up a wooden box.

"Oh! Oh, Luke!" Rory's eyes went wide in amazement, taking in the casket he'd fashioned. "Mom!" she called. "Mom, you've got to see this! Oh, Luke, it's perfect." Her whole face beamed at him in appreciation.

He ducked his head, never comfortable with praise. "It's not much," he muttered.

"Yes, it is," she insisted, tucking her hair behind her ear in a motion he'd seen from Lorelai thousands of times. She looked back over at her mother, who still hadn't budged from the steps, in irritation. "Mom!"

"It's OK," he maintained, really not wanting to request anything of Lorelai, and started to walk over to where she stood. Rory hurried to get ahead of him.

Luke sat the doggy-sized coffin on the sidewalk in front of her and managed to avoid looking directly at her, even when he straightened up.

"Look at this," Rory said in an awe-struck tone, bending to trace the chiseled letters in the lid. "Isn't this beautiful, Mom? _Mom!_"

Lorelai jumped as though she just then became aware of their presence in front of her. She gasped in shock, her hand fluttering up to her throat.

"Look what Luke made for Paul Anka," Rory said, sounding like a very patient kindergarten teacher with a dim pupil. "Isn't it beautiful?"

Lorelai broke completely out of her trance and dropped to her knees, running her hands over the smooth, dark wood, and letting her fingers trace the letters spelling out their pet's name just as Rory had.

"Beautiful," she agreed softly. Her hands were shaking, and she tucked them firmly under her arms once she stood back up.

"I'll go get the shovel," Luke said, turning to go back to his truck. "Do you know where you want the grave?"

Rory looked to Lorelai, but Lorelai stared at her feet. After a moment Rory gave up and turned towards Luke. "Mom said under the chuppah."

That stopped him in his tracks. "Are you sure?" he asked hesitantly, after a pause.

Again, Rory looked at her mother, her patience was wearing thin. Apparently, Lorelai was really not going to talk. "Yes, she's sure," Rory replied, with a bite in her words. "She says it already makes her sad to look at it, so this way all of the sadness will be in one spot."

Lorelai's head jerked up at that and she glared at Rory. Luke assumed that wasn't supposed to be a comment for his ears.

"Zombie Mom," he heard Rory mutter while on his way to the truck.

He paused to hear Lorelai's retort to that, but…there wasn't one. Silent Lorelai. He gripped the edge of the truck bed before grabbing his shovel. He knew everything had changed, but he wasn't expecting this. He took a deep breath and resolutely went over to the side yard to prepare the hole.

The hard-packed ground gave him some initial resistance, but soon the grave was hollowed out, the casket was laid to rest and Luke was replacing the sod over the top. As he was pushing the edges down with his foot, Rory cleared her throat.

"I have something I'd like to read."

Luke looked up and saw that she was clutching a children's book, 'Best-Loved Poems.'

"Rory, no!" Lorelai finally spoke. Forcefully.

"Well, did you prepare anything to say?" Rory asked her mother scornfully. When Lorelai shook her head, she turned to Luke. "Did you?"

"No," he admitted.

"Well, I did." She opened the book.

"Rory, don't! I'm begging you—Don't!"

Luke looked between them uncertainly. He'd always had complete faith in Rory's social graces."Lorelai, I think a poem might be nice -"

"Ha! Wrong! Not this poem!" For the first time, Lorelai looked and sounded like herself. "Do you remember the first time you saw 'Old Yeller' and you thought your lungs would come right out of your chest because of how hard you were sobbing? Well, this poem makes 'Old Yeller' look like a comedy."

"I don't care!" Rory was undeterred. "It's a fitting tribute to him. I came prepared, and I'm going to read it!"

Lorelai opened her mouth, but soon closed it again. "Fine," she said, resigned, and folded her arms again, the blank look settling back over her face.

"All right then." Mollified, Rory began to read. _"Old dog lay in the summer sun, much too lazy to rise and run…"_

Luke tried to listen respectfully, but that soon turned to disbelief as the sadness of the words sunk in. He glanced at Lorelai's immobile face and decided that her idea of zoning out was possibly the right one. He let his mind drift.

It immediately drifted to the night Paul Anka died. He hadn't really let himself think about what had happened between them yet; not that night, nor the one a month earlier when they'd ended. Truthfully, he hadn't let himself think about anything at all since her one sentence: _I slept with Christopher._ He'd had years of practice in not thinking about Lorelai Gilmore. It was surprisingly easy to go back to that state of mind. He knew he was hurt, and angry, and damaged in a way that might be beyond repair. Shutting down everything except the basic functions he needed to get through the day seemed to be a logical escape from the devastation inside him. Refusing to think about Lorelai and the heartbreak she'd caused was his method of letting some healing begin.

He stole a glance at Lorelai, at her pale, blank face and glazed-over eyes. He knew she was hurting too, from the devastation she'd brought down on them. He never thought he'd see her so silent. So still.

_"It's all my fault, Luke! I'm sorry, so, so sorry!"_

He heard her voice in his head from the night Paul Anka died. He winced, remembering how hysterical, how fragile she had seemed. And his solution to her meltdown? _Sex._ He'd never felt more ashamed of himself. All he'd wanted to do was comfort her and share some of the pain. He truly hadn't meant for it to end with them in bed.

Oh, who was he kidding? Maybe that wasn't his intention, but he certainly knew the intense physical pull that existed, always, between them. There was a reason he'd barely touched her during the first eight years he knew her.

But the night Paul Anka died he'd let himself touch her. He'd held her close; kissed her. He'd taken her to bed. They'd made love—there was no use calling it anything else. For just a few hours he'd allowed himself the ultimate luxury of pretending there was no one but the two of them in the universe. There was no Christopher, no April, no postponed wedding, nobody walking away.

_"I've waited, Luke, I've stayed away and let you run this thing, but no more! I love you, Luke, I love you! Don't you love me?"_

A shudder swept over him as he once again heard her words from the night of the ultimatum. Oh, God, that night. He pictured her again as she stood in the street that night, begging him to marry her. Pleading with him to say he loved her. Another night when she was absolutely hysterical, ready to tip over into madness.

Was she still that hysterical when she knocked on Christopher's door? Did he look out at the woman he still had feelings for and see her standing there heartbroken, ready to shatter into pieces? Did he pull her to him, trying to comfort her? Did he stroke her hair, and wipe her wet face, and murmur words of love to soothe her? Did he take her to bed to try and show her how much he still cared?

As Luke saw the parallels between those two nights his body reacted violently and for a moment he thought he was going to have to drop to his knees beside the bushes and be sick. His head was burning hot, not just from the relentless June sun, and his lungs hurt when he tried to draw a deep breath.

_He was no better than Christopher_. The revelation was overwhelming to him. After all of the years he'd spent mocking the guy, looking down at him and despising the sniveling little weasel while he felt oh-so-superior, and here his own actions were nearly identical. Face it, he'd bailed on Lorelai and left her floundering in their relationship on her own, leaving her hanging as he focused on something he thought was more important. And instead of giving her the emotional support she needed the night Paul Anka died, he'd…

A movement off to his side jerked him away from his self-recrimination. Rory had dropped the book and had her head buried in Lorelai's shoulder, her tears coming fast. Lorelai held Rory close and patted her back comfortingly, while her own face still showed a complete lack of emotion.

As though she could feel his gaze, Rory pulled away from Lorelai's shoulder and turned to glare at him.

"You! Get over here!" she sniffled at him petulantly.

"Wh…What?" he stammered.

Rory pulled further away from her mother, put her hands on her hips and let the emotions of the day cut through any social awkwardness she might have otherwise suffered.

"I understand that things are bad with you two," she started. "Believe me, I understand. But you promised me! _Both_ of you promised me, repeatedly, that no matter what happened with the two of you as a couple, it would not in any way affect _us._ You said that the thing we always had, with the three of us being kind of our own little family, you said that wouldn't change. And this is one of the times when I _need_ my family, so damn it, Luke, get over here!"

Her eyes snapped at him the way Lorelai's had, once upon a time, and he automatically responded, walking over and putting his arms around them both.

Lorelai jerked and her breath hissed out of her like she'd leaned on a hot stove when his hand touched her shoulder. Luke dropped his hand instantly, his guilt burning through him as well.

Rory was immediately contrite. "Oh, Mom, I didn't mean…"

A slamming door drew their attention away from their blundering little drama. Babette and Morey were walking towards them, Babette carrying a huge red geranium in a terra cotta pot.

"Sorry, dollfaces, about intruding, but we wanted to offer our condolences. We'll never forget how much it helped to have everyone around to lean on when Cinnamon passed. You mind if we join ya?" Babette ventured to ask in her husky voice, for once sounding subdued.

Rory quickly looked from Luke to her mom, then broke away to stand by their neighbors. "Of course, stay," she invited them, attempting to smile.

At nearly the same time, Michel appeared around the side of the house. The normally frosty Frenchman walked directly up to Lorelai, placing his hands on her shoulders and giving her a quick kiss on each cheek.

"Oh…my," Lorelai said weakly.

"You should have told me," he admonished her gently. "No one should suffer a loss like this alone. I am here to help." He turned to embrace an aghast Rory, who managed to give Luke a panicked eye roll first.

Car doors slammed, and Sookie came bearing a cooler and a hamper, leading more Dragonfly staff with tables and food. Within minutes, half of the town was in the backyard.

Lorelai turned on her automatic hostess mode, the way she coped daily at the inn, and went about greeting people and finding extension cords and ice. Twenty minutes passed in a blur of hugs and sympathy, finding a bandage for Kirk's scraped elbow, and fending off Sookie's well-meaning attempts to feed her.

When she could she stopped to draw a breath, and she could tell, just by the way the air felt, that Luke was gone. The thought that there would never again be any reason for him to come to the house hit her with such force that her knees began to wobble beneath her.

"Oh, you poor thing," Miss Patty crooned, putting out her arm to support Lorelai as much as she could, but she didn't have enough strength to stop Lorelai from meeting the ground.

Rory heard the commotion and turned in time to see her mom crumple. She was there beside her in seconds.

"He's gone," Lorelai sobbed to her daughter, unable to keep the tears at bay. In the back of her mind she hated herself for being this weak; for having devolved into this woman who couldn't even stand on her own two feet, but for today, that's exactly who she was. "He's really gone."

Rory nodded, biting back her own tears while she held her mother fiercely. She was the only person there who knew Lorelai didn't mean Paul Anka.


	3. The Piper Must Be Paid

"So what did she say then?" Lorelai asked her daughter, tucking the cell phone under her ear as she juggled her purse and her keys while opening the front door.

"Well, she said that they should be grateful she was there at all, and it wasn't her fault that their filing system harkens back to a time when the printed word was the newest innovation." Rory tried to have a daily Paris anecdote ready to relay to her mother. She pretended not to know that Lorelai called her as she headed home each day so that she wouldn't have to enter the still, lifeless house on her own.

For her part, Lorelai pretended to not even realize what time of day she was calling Rory. "Did she really use the word 'harken?'" she asked eagerly.

"It's Paris. What do you think?"

"Sorry. Forgot who we were talking about," Lorelai giggled. She flung her purse down on the table in the entryway and stepped out of her shoes as she headed for the couch in the living room. She lowered her weary body down thankfully, trying not to groan so loudly that Rory would hear.

Rory heard it anyway. "You OK there, Grandma?" she teased.

"Watch it," Lorelai warned her. She sighed as her body relaxed into a more horizontal position. "I'm just so tired. I can't ever remember being this tired. Davey brought home a flu bug and promptly passed it on to Martha, who in turn infected her father, who of course gave it to Sookie, who so kindly came to work the first day she felt crummy and stood next to Michel, and so then of course Michel had to catch it, too. So for the past two weeks I've been running around like crazy, trying to fill in everywhere, and I'm exhausted. Plus I feel like crap myself. I think I'm coming down with it, too."

"Poor mommy," Rory sympathized.

"That's better." She tried to get more comfortable, angling herself further down on the couch, while pushing her free hand down inside the waistband of her slacks. On top of everything she was retaining water and crankily waiting for her period to start. She could barely get the button on these pants fastened that morning.

"Are Sookie and Michel back now?"

"Yeah." Lorelai decided the hell with it and popped open the button on her waistband.

"Well, maybe you could take some time off then," Rory suggested. "Oh, I know! Come visit me!"

"I'd love to, Kid, but if I'm getting sick that wouldn't be smart," Lorelai said reluctantly.

Paris had found unpaid internships for herself and Rory at a small college library close to Philadelphia. A benefactor had recently bequeathed the college a huge amount of Civil War era correspondence and the girls were helping to catalog and digitize it, although Rory said they were more like go-fers for the experts overseeing the operation. Rory, of course, found it all to be fascinating, while Paris griped and tried to bully them into doing it her way.

"Come when you feel better, then," Rory urged.

"Sure," Lorelai agreed, not really giving it any thought. In the few weeks since Paul Anka's death, she'd found that living solely in the present was the best way to cope. She didn't worry about the future; she didn't agonize over the past; she concentrated wholly on what she was doing at that moment and that moment only. She lived with blinders on, doing her best to ignore anything that would remind her of Luke and the life they should be living.

"So…Mom," Rory ventured, obviously wanting to say something, but nervous.

"Hmm?" Lorelai asked as she shifted further down on the couch. She laid her head on the padded arm and closed her eyes. _It would be so easy to fall asleep right here_, she thought.

"I don't know if I should mention this or not."

"What?"

"It's about Dad." Rory paused. "And I know the face you're making right now, whether I can see you or not." With a sigh Rory continued. "He's taking G.G. to France for a while, so she can be with Sherry. He wanted me to know."

"My, how responsible of him," Lorelai sniped.

"He's planning on staying there, maybe for six months. He said he'd pay for me to fly over for a visit, if I wanted."

"You should go," Lorelai said grudgingly. "You could see Logan that way, too. Spend some time in London."

"I'll have to see if I have the time before school starts." Rory paused, waiting to see if her mother was going to add anything. When it became apparent she wasn't, Rory breathed deeply and plunged ahead. "So I guess the two of you had a rough conversation?"

"It wasn't rough. It was direct. It was succinct. It was necessary. I'd tried being nice but he refused to give up on his version of how the world should be. So I put it in terms he'd understand. That stupid night killed our friendship. It killed everything. Now it makes me sick to hear his voice, because all I can think of is the colossal mistake I made. And I know it's not all his fault, Rory," she rushed on. "I know it's my fault because I went to him that night. It's my fault that I thought he'd act like my friend. I should have known better. God, I"m an idiot. I mean, I should have known."

"I wasn't trying to upset you, Mom," Rory broke into Lorelai's self-reproach. "I just thought you might like to know he heard you. He's leaving. You don't have to worry about him being around."

At that moment Lorelai's stomach did that weird twisting thing that made her feel like throwing up. She sat up, pressing a hand to her midsection as she leaned her head back, taking a deep breath against the nausea. She tried to concentrate on talking to Rory, ignoring the rebellion brewing in her tummy.

"You know I don't want you to cut him out of your life, right?" As always, she did her best to play the impartial mother to Rory. "But I just can't stand to talk about him right now," she still felt the need to mutter.

"I'm not real happy with him either, you know," Rory said loyally. "He should have helped you that night. For once, he should have forgotten his own agenda."

Lorelai gulped down a breath of air and held it for a minute as her stomach once again threatened upheaval. "Hey, Rory, I'm really not feeling good here, Kid. I think I need to go." She rubbed her head tiredly.

"Go take some aspirin and lie down," Rory urged. "Call me tomorrow?"

"I'll try to fit you in my busy social calendar. Tell Paris hi, and don't let her near the laminating machine!" She tried to make her voice lighthearted, the way it used to sound, in spite of her physical ickiness.

After ending the call, Lorelai laid down on the couch, stretching out. She covered her eyes with her arm.

_So tired_, she thought. It was like weariness was oozing up out of the ground and sinking into her feet, traveling up her legs and anchoring her to a great pit of despair that sucked every bit of energy out of her. The weariness was bad enough, but combined with the yucky pre-flu symptoms and the normal PMS crap she couldn't believe how bad she felt. All she wanted was for the flu to start in earnest and for her period to start so she could tackle them and get over them, and go back to just being heartbroken.

_How sad is it_, she wondered, _that I'm actually looking forward to…_

Suddenly she was standing, her heart racing, in the midst of a full-blown panic attack.

"No," she said, voicing the word out loud with grim determination. "That's not possible. That's not possible!"

She sprinted to the foyer, grabbing her purse and dumping everything in it to the floor, crashing to her knees to paw through the contents. She found the little Day-Timer she was never without and frantically tore through the pages until she found the little mark above the date she was looking for. Then she counted. She counted again, and again, and again. And every time she ended on a date ten days prior to today.

"This isn't funny," she threatened the universe. "Oh, God, this can't be happening," she then whispered in despair.

Taking a deep, calming breath, she counted halfway, and her shaking finger hovered over June the third.

Her breathing stopped and she stared at the date for a moment. She nearly laughed, because, seriously, who wouldn't laugh at the being the butt of such a huge, cosmic joke? But she gained control, swept everything back into her bag, slid back into her shoes, grabbed her phone and was out the door before despair and self-pity could bog her down.

* * *

_I could live here_, Lorelai thought, looking around the pristine stall in the ladies' room at the new Burger King in Woodbury. The color scheme was soothing, all grays and aquas, and it was so new that nothing obscene had yet to be scratched into the stall door. She'd be able to get plenty to eat, and Rory'd come visit, right? And you heard all the time about these women who gave birth in some public restroom or other, who claimed they didn't even know they were pregnant. See? It was fine. She had a plan.

Lorelai looked down again at the plastic indicator she was clutching. If possible, the plus sign had appeared even faster than the first test she'd taken across town at McDonald's.

Fear crashed down on her without warning and she leaned her forehead against the door, breathing hard.

_My God_, she thought. _I'm a soap opera. I belong on Jerry Springer._

She shoved the stick into her jacket pocket and opened the door, stumbling on shaky legs over to the sink.

A woman a head shorter than Lorelai and probably a decade older came to wash her hands at the sink next to her. The woman's salt-and-pepper hair softly curled around her kind face. She looked exactly like the motherly type of person you'd hope your child would go to if they got lost. The maternal instinct was practically radiating out from her.

Lorelai bit back some wild giggles as she imagined herself turning to this sweet woman and filling her in on the insane twists her life had suddenly developed.

She glanced down at the woman beside her again. She'd probably always been the room mother, Lorelai decided. She'd always baked the cookies for parties, always made the Halloween costumes, always gone on the field trips.

A wild snort of laughter did escape her this time as she realized she'd just described herself as well. Maybe she hadn't actually baked the cookies on her own, but still, she'd made sure there _were_ cookies.

The woman cast her a nervous smile and took half a step away.

"I'm not crazy," Lorelai reassured her, as more crazy laughter erupted from her throat, somewhat negating her reassurance. "I'm may be pregnant, but I'm not crazy!"

At that, the woman gave her a much friendlier smile. "Oh, yes, I remember those days. All pregnant women are a little insane, I think. Here you are, with another person growing inside you, and you're just supposed to go on like normal?" She shook her head, grinning at Lorelai in the mirror. "Who comes up with this stuff?"

Lorelai wished desperately that just once her own mother had looked at her with such kind, non-judgmental eyes.

"It wasn't supposed to be like this," she blurted out, unable to stop her impulse to tell this poor woman everything. "A couple of months ago this would have been the most amazing thing. But then my fiance' decided he didn't really want me, and I was hurting so bad, I mean, I was out of my mind, and I did something so hurtful, so self-destructive, and then my dog died, and he came over, and…" Here Lorelai made a quick motion towards her middle, summing up the situation. "But it wasn't supposed to be like this! I'm old enough to know better now. I have a daughter who's going to graduate from Yale in a year, for crying out loud! It wasn't supposed to happen like this again!"

The woman blinked a few times, taking it all in, but didn't go running for the door. Instead she looked appraisingly at Lorelai.

"You have a daughter at Yale?" she asked.

"Yes. Rory," Lorelai replied, her pride flowing out around her daughter's name the way it always did.

"Either you had her really young or you have really good genes," her restroom companion speculated.

"Sixteen," Lorelai stated, because she'd never sugarcoated that fact.

"That must have been hard," the woman said, still with no hint of judgment.

"It was and it wasn't," Lorelai shrugged. "But the hard part was all worth it. She's the best thing that ever happened to me."

The woman smiled at Lorelai wholeheartedly, her eyes lighting up and her hand involuntarily tugging at a locket at her throat. "You really love your daughter," she observed.

"So much," Lorelai sighed out shakily.

"And this baby, the one that's coming," she said, motioning towards Lorelai's middle. "Will you love it just as much?"

Until that second, Lorelai had been so focused on the drama of the situation that the fact that there was actually going to be a _baby_ had escaped her. Her baby. Luke's baby.

Her hands instantly spread protectively over her stomach. "Oh, yes," she said tenderly. "Yes, this baby will be very much loved."

"Well, then," the woman shrugged. "That's all that matters, isn't it? I mean, everything else is just the details."

Lorelai nodded slowly, feeling the tension inside of her start to loosen.

The woman rubbed some gloss on her lips before heading to the door. "Oh, by the way," she called back, smiling. "Congratulations!"

"Thanks!" Lorelai called, watching the door swing shut.

Suddenly all she could think about was getting to Luke.

* * *

In the midst of months of crappy days, today had been the crappiest. Not one thing had gone right since Luke had climbed out of bed that morning. First, Kirk had dumped his never-changing bowl of oatmeal on the floor and it had taken Luke forever to get the disgusting gray splatters cleaned up. Every time he thought he was done he found another pocket of oatmeal resistance. Then Taylor had come in harping about changing the parking laws for the main street outside of the diner, which would allow cars to park on one side one week...blah, blah, blah. Typical Taylor. Take something easy and make it impossible for anyone to follow, then fine 'em if they didn't comply. Later in the day the health inspector had dropped by, and of course, today was the day that Caesar had to leave a bowl of experimental salsa out on the counter, uncovered, and they'd gotten written up for it. To top the day off, Luke had found that a bill had dropped out of sight behind his dad's old desk upstairs, so now he owed a penalty to the water company. All he wanted was to finish mopping and head upstairs. Hopefully there was enough beer in his refrigerator to erase the bad taste this day had given him.

A sudden rapping on the door brought his head jerking up. He sighed. Of course, this would be the night Lorelai would finally decide they needed to talk. He hadn't seen her at all for days. Of course. This would be the perfect ending to this crappy day.

He threw down the mop and stomped to the door, determined to tell her to go home. He just wasn't in the mood to rehash their drama tonight.

He glared at her through the glass but the angry words he was ready to let fly stuck in his throat. The phrase 'death warmed over' flew around his head as he twisted open the lock and threw the door open. He put his arm around her automatically, drawing her in. He yanked down a chair with his free arm and pushed her down into it.

"Just sit," he ordered. "I'll grab my keys and drive you to the emergency room. I'll just be a minute."

"No…Luke, wait," she said, wincing, trying to grab his arm to stop him. She wished she would have looked into a mirror first. If she looked as bad as she felt, no wonder Luke was freaking out. She'd left Woodbury buoyed up by the warm thought of the baby, but cold fear and apprehension had overtaken her the closer she got to Stars Hollow. She'd been driving around aimlessly for an extra hour, at least, too scared to drive the last five miles into town and face him. Fear had turned her stomach inside out, and she'd had to stop beside the road at one point to throw up, and she'd then sat in the Jeep for untold minutes, sobbing her heart out. She could only imagine how much mascara was swimming around her eyes and how wild her hair was.

"I'm not sick," she told him, as he turned to look at her.

He scanned her quickly, absorbing her defeated posture, her dull, red-rimmed eyes, her ashen complexion. "Right," he sniffed. "Let's just let the doctor decide that."

"I'm not…I'm not sick," she tried again, making her voice firmer. "I thought I was sick," she added, as he stopped walking to the stairs and turned to concentrate on her. The crazy laughter from back in the restroom bubbled out of her throat again, sounding totally out-of-place in the empty, sad diner. "I thought…I thought I had the flu." She tried hard to choke down the manic giggles before he had her committed. "But I don't," she ended, taking in a huge, shuddering breath.

Suddenly Luke was ten again, and it was the summer when everyone thought his mom had the flu, or a cold she just couldn't shake.

_Of course,_ he thought, feeling the world collapse under him, _of course I'll lose her, too_.

Then he saw that she was handing something to him that she'd had in her jacket pocket. He reached to take the two Popsicle sticks from her, knowing it was insane that at this moment she wanted to throw away trash that she'd accumulated, but considering that this was Lorelai, it certainly wasn't the craziest thing he'd ever seen her do by a long shot.

"Lorelai, what are you―"

And just like that, he knew. It all clicked in his mind, even without the helpful 'pregnant' printed on the stick.

"Well, that's just great." He laughed harshly, bitterly, and Lorelai bit her lips in pain at the sound. "That's fantastic. You must be thrilled." She'd probably never heard him this angry. He took one last look at the plastic indicators before flinging them back down on the table in front of her.

He turned away, his shoulders heaving as he fought for control. He whipped back around to confront her.

"So, have you told _him_ yet? Is he going to stick around this time and help you raise this one? Or does he figure there's no need, since you've got it all figured out? Man, I've got to hand it to you. You came up with a way to make sure he'd be in your life for another 20 years, didn't you?" He flung the cruel taunts at her as hard as he could, as the devastation from this most recent blow rubbed away whatever defenses he'd been able to use a shield.

Lorelai was reeling from his accusations, shaking from his anger and hurt. This was a mistake, she realized, coming here without planning first. He wasn't going to hear her tonight. She needed to get out of here and let him calm down. She'd try again later. Maybe she should try to write it down in a letter. She still had some Garfield stationary somewhere.

_Oh yeah_, she thought, _because that worked so well before._

She used her arms to raise herself from the table. She slipped one of the sticks back into her pocket, then stepped cautiously to the door, trying not to wobble.

Luke was drinking in huge gulps of air, clenching his fists, striving hard to not lose it completely and start smashing chairs and tables. Part of his brain saw her start for the door, and his traitorous heart still wanted to cry out for her to stop, wait, they'd figure it all out, he'd raise this baby with her, it just didn't matter. But the rest of him, the part of him still smarting from her betrayal needed the last word.

"There's just one thing I don't get, Lorelai," he said with a devastating coldness he didn't even know he could muster. "What in the world made you come here and tell _me_ this?" The pain in his heart overtook the anger and he stood there, panting, waiting for her answer.

She turned, clutching a rung on one of the upturned chairs for support. With great effort she kept her voice even and free from tears. "I know how much you regret everything you missed with April." She had to pause, swallowing hard. "I wanted to make sure that you were here from the very beginning with this baby." She deleted everything else she longed to say and once again stepped towards the door.

Her words swirled around him and at last they penetrated through his pain and fury, but they made no sense to him. It almost sounded like she meant…That she was telling him…

He got his legs to work and rushed to get between her and the door. He knocked her hand away from the doorknob, and looked deep into her glittering, hard blue eyes when she raised her head.

"Wait," he said, feeling like he was out of sync with the scene playing out before him. "Lorelai, I don't understand. What are you saying?"

Her eyes blazed out at him then, and she lifted her chin in defiance. "I'm saying that this baby was conceived on June the third. But you are absolutely right about one thing: I am perfectly capable of raising it on my own."

She forced herself past him then as he just stood there, shocked into stillness. Her heartbeat pounded in her ears so loudly she wasn't sure she could hear him, even if would call for her. Somehow she made it outside and crossed the street. Gratefully she leaned against the Jeep, unsure of how she'd managed to reach it. For a moment she was unable to remember how to open the door and climb inside.

_Breathe_, she told herself._ Just breathe._

She drove home in a daze. She made herself stroll casually to her door in case Babette was watching, but once inside she tore up the steps, landing on her knees in front of the toilet just in time.

Exhausted, she leaned against the cool porcelain until she felt like her shaky legs would hold her up. She leaned over "her" side of the double sink, running water over her hands and splashing her face, taking handfuls of the water to rinse out her mouth. At last she wet a washcloth and pressed it to her face, breathing open-mouthed through the wet terrycloth in an effort to still the nausea still vibrating through her.

Clutching the washcloth, she worked her way into the bedroom, using her other hand to steady herself from the sink to the doorframe, then to the dresser, and finally to the bed. She shuffled out of her shoes and pulled off her jacket, letting it lay where it landed. The draining weariness came over her again and she collapsed onto the bed sideways, too tired to even aim her head at the pillow.

* * *

Luke watched her leave the diner, still too paralyzed with shock to even think about going after her. He saw her have trouble getting into the Jeep, and was relieved when she finally drove off safely. He turned away from the door and managed to plop down heavily onto the chair she'd been sitting in just moments before.

He needed time to process this. He needed to understand how the pieces fit together. He sat for uncounted minutes, just letting the words swirl aimlessly through his head as he traced the divots and scratches in the well-worn table with his fingers. Eventually some of the words started to stick.

Pregnant.

Lorelai was pregnant.

His baby.

June third.

He groaned at that. As if he didn't already feel slimy enough about his actions that night, now there would be a perpetual physical reminder. But still…

A baby.

They were going to have a baby.

He suddenly felt his mouth turning upwards in an instinctive smile, and excitement laced with anticipation was curling around his stomach, like a kid waiting for Christmas morning.

_You're crazy_, he told himself. _Crazy if you think this is going to erase what she did._

He continued to sternly lecture himself, but visions of Little League games and a little blue-eyed ballerina alternated in his mind.

He saw that he'd absently picked up the test stick and had been moving it from hand-to-hand. He examined it more closely now.

She'd taken two tests, he realized. Probably because she'd wanted to be sure, but that way there was one for each of them.

_I wanted to make sure that you were here from the very beginning with this baby._ He heard her voice again, telling him that.

"OK, then," he said out loud, standing up decisively. He slipped the indicator into his shirt pocket as he hurried to the stairs. In no time he was back down again. He went straight out the door, not even sparing a glance at the mop still lying on the floor.

Luke walked to Lorelai's house briskly, only dimly aware of the soft night noises and the cooler temperature surrounding him. He found that once again her door was unlocked. He sighed, locking it firmly behind him. At the stairs he sat long enough to remove his boots.

Upstairs he found her sprawled across the bed, and his heart clenched at seeing her so vulnerable and washed out. Cautiously he eased the washcloth she was clutching out of her hand, and then managed to get his arm under her so that he could gently tug her to lay the right way on the bed. Finally he laid down beside her, gratified beyond measure when she snuggled up against him in her sleep.

* * *

By the time Lorelai forced her eyes open in the morning, bright sunshine was pouring into the room. Her eyes went wide as she saw Luke's face next to her own, his eyes already open and waiting on her. Before she could say anything her face paled and she panicked, launching herself out of the bed with an unaware push to Luke's stomach.

"Hey!" he protested, rubbing his stomach, but then he heard her gagging in the bathroom and he understood. He pushed himself to a sitting position on the edge of the bed and waited.

Finally she emerged from the bathroom, shaky but minus the ghostly pallor. She'd washed her face and had attempted to tame her hair. She swept a curious glance his way as she cautiously lowered herself to the edge of the bed opposite of him, once again clutching a damp washcloth.

"So…That's morning sickness?" he ventured. Normally Luke would shy away from asking anything like that, but this was Lorelai and he was concerned. And curious. He really did want to share everything about this baby.

"Yep," she answered with a sigh.

Her looked at the washcloth and made the connection. "Were you sick last night when you came home, too?" he asked, his forehead crinkling with worry.

"Yep," she said again, not feeling up to longer answers.

"Is that normal?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"But I thought―You know, _morning_ sickness," he emphasized, confused.

"Well, Luke, unfortunately the baby has no sense of time. Babies are like little Jimmy Buffets. They figure it's morning somewhere."

"Huh," he said, absorbing that information.

Lorelai suddenly snapped her fingers. "I'll need to get saltines."

"Saltines?"

"Yeah, crackers." She smiled softly. "That was the only thing that saved me with Rory. I'd put 'em beside my bed at night, and then in the morning before I'd even open my eyes, I'd reach over," she said, shutting her eyes and pantomiming the motions, "and grab a cracker and eat it. I'd go through half a sleeve until my stomach felt like it would behave, then I'd get out of bed. I'd keep those little packets you get in restaurants tucked in my purse and in my pockets for emergencies." She chuckled. "Mom was so mad at me. The maid was constantly pulling soggy cracker packets out of the wash."

Luke smiled back at her. They shared the camaraderie of the moment until Lorelai looked away, feeling flustered at his presence in their old bedroom, and noticed the bright daylight.

"What time is it?"

"Don't know." Luke glanced at his watch. "Almost 7:30."

"Shouldn't you be at the diner?"

"I slapped up the 'Gone Fishing' sign when I left last night. I called Lane and told her I'd be out of town for a few days, and if she and Zach wanted to set up a schedule with Caesar, that was up to them. You know what's the best thing about that kid? She doesn't ask a lot of unnecessary questions."

"Yeah," Lorelai agreed, absently, "she's great." She was thinking that she shouldn't be surprised that Luke was leaving. That had always been his way of dealing with new developments that threatened to upset his life. She wondered if he'd taken the time to 'go fishing' after learning about April if things would have turned out differently. Would he have let her in if he'd had time to process it first?

"Lorelai?"

"Hmmm? What?" She became aware that she'd missed something.

"I said, I think you should come with me," he repeated nervously.

"Fishing?" she asked, wrinkling her nose.

"No, just go somewhere so we can talk about this. Figure things out. If we stay here and anyone sees us, it'll be front page news. Especially if you keep throwing up," he added.

Lorelai was ashamed at how excited she instantly was at the thought of spending time with him again, even if was just to hammer out some sort of custody arrangement. _You're pathetic,_ she chastised herself.

"You really think that's a good idea?" she hedged.

Luke nodded. "Just getting out of town would be good. How long's it been since you've had a day off?" he challenged.

"Uh…" Lorelai thought back and spoke without thinking. "Um, Valentine's Day, I guess."

Luke shot her a hurt look, and she made a motion with her hands that meant, 'forget I said that.'

He sighed, shrugging as if it didn't matter. "Well, call Sookie and tell her you need a few days off."

She rubbed at the back of her neck as she considered. "I am really tired," she conceded. "OK."

"Tell her you'll be back by Monday."

Lorelai's eyebrows rose. "That long?"

Luke shrugged. "Might as well make it worth our while. Can you be ready to go by 10:30?"

Lorelai looked blankly around the room. "Uh, sure, I guess."

"Meet me at Liz and T.J.'s," Luke said as he stood up. "They're on the renaissance circuit again, so I thought I'd stash my truck in their garage. And they're on the other side of town, so less chance of the gossips seeing us leave."

"Sounds like quite the plan," Lorelai commented, just a little suspiciously.

"Well, I've been awake for a while," he admitted.

Lorelai followed Luke as he left the room. She leaned against the bedroom door, watching him go down the stairs. Halfway down he stopped, looking back up at her.

"Listen, Lorelai," he started, sounding uncertain. "I love you," he said in a rush. "That hasn't changed, you know?"

She gave a slight jerk of her head, acknowledging she'd heard him, not that she believed him.

"I want to take care of you, and the baby," he continued. "But I'm still hurt. I'm still angry. I don't know when I'll really be able to trust you again."

Lorelai nodded in complete agreement. "I still love you, Luke. That never stopped, not even for a second, although I can imagine that's hard for you to believe. But I'm still angry with you, too, and I'm still hurt. And the trust thing is really going to take a while to come back for me."

Luke's mouth dropped open in shock, but before he could challenge her, her face went gray again and she ran for the bathroom.

Shaking his head at her crazy words, he continued on down the stairs, knowing that they'd definitely have to have a discussion about them later.

"She doesn't trust _me,_" he scoffed, making sure to lock the door securely behind him as he left. "Yeah, right. _I'm_ the one who can't be trusted."


	4. The Duckiest Town on the Chesapeake

**Notes:** For those of you observing that Luke is an idiot, yes, yes he is. And Lorelai is still pretending to be a mouse with no backbone. But that's all going to change soon. In fact, when you read this chapter you might need some earplugs, because there's going to be some yelling while these two attempt to find themselves again.

* * *

Luke was amazed when Lorelai's Jeep pulled up behind his truck at just a few minutes past 10:30.

"Wow," he said, rather impressed, as she exited the vehicle. "Right on time. For you, anyway."

She dipped her shoulder modestly. "Well, I wasn't sure what to bring, so I just threw some stuff in a bag. I figure I can always buy something there if I really need it. Any excuse to go shopping, you know?"

"Oh, I know," he said, rolling his eyes, but still he smiled as he teased her. He couldn't believe how good it felt to do that again.

"I thought we'd take the Jeep," he told her. "It's probably a little more comfortable. If that's OK with you."

"Sure," she shrugged. She watched Luke grab a duffle and a garment bag from his truck and bring them to the Jeep. Her eyes grew apprehensive at the sight of the garment bag. "I didn't really bring dress-up stuff."

"No big deal," he said lightly. "I just brought something in case you wanted to eat out somewhere nicer. You make everything you put on look dressy, anyway."

Lorelai flushed at the unexpected compliment. "Thanks, Luke."

He nodded, then stepped over and pulled shut the garage door, hiding his old pickup from view. "You ready?" he asked, brushing his hands against his jeans. "How're you doing?"he asked, trying to not study her too directly.

"I haven't had any more morning sickness," she told him, to his relief. "I'm just wiped out. Would you mind driving?"

Luke jumped at the chance. "Sure, that's fine," he agreed, and stepped around her to open the passenger side door. He took the opportunity to look at her closely as she settled herself into the seat, noting her still-pale complexion with the dark smudges under her dull eyes. He couldn't keep the worried frown off his face as he headed for the driver's side.

From inside the Jeep, Lorelai studied him too as he passed in front of the car, sighing at his worried expression. She smiled in appreciation, though, at the nice, dark jeans he had on, and the sky-blue, short-sleeved Henley top. She felt a little unnerved that he was hatless, but that was a thousand times better than the strange black one he'd been wearing.

He took a moment to adjust the seat and the mirrors. "Well, here we go," he murmured, and pulled out into the street.

* * *

Hours later, Luke pulled into a parking spot next to a municipal building in a well-maintained little town. He stretched, looking over at Lorelai, who was still sound asleep, her head slanted over against the headrest. At the beginning of the trip she'd made one feeble attempt at a joke about her music selection and was out like a light by the time he'd looked at her again.

"Hey, Lorelai," he said softly, patting her shoulder. She shifted, mumbling, but didn't really wake up. "I'm going in here for a minute to get some information. Just stay here, OK? I'll be right back."

"'K," she slurred, drifting back off.

It took longer inside than what Luke had hoped, but he was glad to see that she was still asleep when he returned. He consulted the map he'd been given, then drove to the recommended hotel.

Lorelai awoke to his gorgeous smile. "Hey, Sleepyhead," he said quietly. "We're here."

She smiled and stretched, for a moment forgetting the real reason for the trip. For a moment of luxurious amnesia, she she reached out a hand to his shoulder, giving it an affectionate squeeze before everything fell back into place. Embarrassed, she contracted back into her seat. "Thanks for the nap," she muttered awkwardly.

Next they gathered their things and headed inside, Luke leading the way to the room he'd booked while Lorelai was still asleep.

"Nice," she said approvingly, glancing around the neat hallway, appreciating the fresh flowers displayed on a side table.

Luke opened the door and Lorelai stepped inside the room and froze, momentarily taken aback by the duck-printed wallpaper, the paintings of ducks, and a carved wooden duck sitting on a ledge.

"Huh," she said, her eyebrows rising as she took it all in.

"That's a lot of ducks," Luke commented dryly as he hung his garment bag in the closet space.

"Uh, we're sharing?" Lorelai's voice went up shrilly in surprise.

"Yeah," he said, looking up quickly. "Is that wrong?" He blew out a breath and answered his own question. "Of course that's wrong. Sorry, I didn't even think. I just thought if we needed to talk; to work this out…I'll go get us another room." He nodded and headed for the door.

"No, you know what? Don't bother." Lorelai plopped down on one of the beds and leaned back, yawning. "This is fine. If you're OK with it, I am. We'll just have to take turns going down to the lobby if we feel like killing each other."

Luke chuckled, but privately thought that would probably be the case. He watched as Lorelai leaned back further on the bed, grabbing a pillow and squishing it under her head as she cuddled into it, her eyes once again closing.

"You're still sleepy?" he asked in disbelief.

"You have no idea how much energy it takes to grow one of these things," she muttered, but she sat up, cradling her head in her hands, her elbows on her knees. "Sorry," she smiled lazily at him. "I'll try to stay awake."

He gulped and looked away quickly from her unintentional sexy face. The way his body automatically responded to her made him angry at his lack of control. He began to pace the short length of the room. "I just thought we'd talk about stuff," he groused.

"OK." Lorelai forced a smile. "Never thought I'd hear that from your mouth, but sure. Go ahead. Hit me with your best shot." She braced herself, certain that she knew what the first question would be.

Luke turned towards her, but stared at the floor, not at her. He shoved his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his feet, expelling the air he'd trapped in his lungs.

"You're mad at me?" His own anger smoldered under his words. "You can't trust me?" He looked at her then, glaring, his fists clenched. "I hurt _you_?"

Lorelai's mouth dropped open as she discovered she was wrong about what the first question would be. "Well, yeah," she said, bewildered at his demeanor.

He laughed then, bitterly, and went back to his pacing. "That takes the cake," he muttered. "Please explain why you can't trust me," he demanded, sarcastically.

"April," she replied, simply.

He spun to stare at her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means…Two months, Luke! That's what it means!" In spite of her good intentions, Lorelai felt the anger and hurt she'd managed to bury over the whole situation start to rise again. "Let's face it, if I hadn't have stumbled over her in the diner that day, you never would have told me!"

"That's not true! You don't know that! You don't know how many times I tried! Besides, you said you were over that!"

"Well, I lied!" Lorelai snapped.

"How was I supposed to know that anything was wrong when you pretended it was fine? Why is it my fault when you kept quiet? How was I supposed to know that _Lorelai Gilmore_ wouldn't tell _me,_ wouldn't talk to _me_ about what was bugging her?"

"Well, what happened to the guy I knew, huh? What happened to the guy who could take one look at my face and know what I was feeling! Who knew what I needed! Where'd he go, huh? How was I supposed to know he'd lost that ability and wasn't just ignoring me?"

"So it's all my fault because I'm not a mind-reader?"

"Yes! No―I don't know!" Lorelai took a deep breath and tried to focus. "Do you know," she said thickly, more calmly, "before I found out about April, I was worried that maybe you'd found someone else?"

"Oh, come on, Lorelai!" He sounded disgusted.

"No, seriously," she insisted. "I knew something was wrong. Remember Christmas? How weird it was? Rory was home and it should have been so happy, but you were so distant. I gave you that book on the Red Sox, and wrote something in the front about promising not to distract you while you read it, because I'd managed to lure you away from the TV one night. Remember? You couldn't even look at me. It was like you were ashamed to look at me."

Luke was fuming but silent. Her recollection of the holiday was correct. He had been ashamed and petrified into inaction. He'd ached to tell her but by then the hole he'd dug himself into had already seemed insurmountable.

"I didn't think you'd cheat on me, but I just couldn't figure out what was wrong," Lorelai added.

"Well, I didn't think you'd cheat on me either, but boy, was I wrong about that!" Luke shot at her.

"You lied to me for two months, Luke!"

"You're honestly comparing you cheating to me not telling you about April? Unbelievable!"

"All I know is, you had this wonderful, joyful thing happen to you, probably the biggest thing ever, in your whole life, and you didn't tell me! You didn't _want_ to tell me! And then, even after I found out, you didn't want to share it with me! You shut me out, Luke!" she cried, the words still echoing the pain she felt.

He hated hearing her like this. She was keeping herself from crying, but her voice shook with the emotional strain. His fury, however, kept his sympathy buried.

"And you'd know all about that, how? Because you're so good at sharing Rory?"

Lorelai gave a snort of derision. "You think I kept Rory from you? You think I told her she was forbidden to go to the diner when we fought?"

"No, but―"

"That's right, I didn't! You had more access to her than anyone, even before we started dating! More than Christopher ever did!"

Hearing his name made both of them grimace, but Luke tried to vault over it.

"Except when it counted," he fumed.

"What do you mean?"

"That whole fiasco after she dropped out of school. We had to do it your way then, that's for sure!"

Lorelai shook her head vigorously. "That's because she needed to grow up. She needed to push herself and do it for herself, not because her Mommy and Luke were making her. I never stopped you from going to see her and talk to her, Luke!"

"Yeah, right," he said, rolling his eyes.

She growled in frustration. "Don't you realize how much influence you had on us? Don't you know how many times I came to you for advice while Rory was growing up? You'd pour me coffee, and I'd gripe, and you'd grunt out a few words, and by the time I'd leave I'd have a handle on the situation." She paused to let her next words sink in. "It took me years to realize it, but you helped me raise her, Luke."

She watched his face soften a bit. His stance was still rigid, but he didn't look as angry, and that caused her to misjudge what she said next.

"That's why I wish you would have let me help you with April, and with Anna. There were probably a lot of insights I could have given you about how to deal with a possessive single mom."

The hiatus from anger was very, very brief.

"You just don't get it, do you?" he exploded again. "This situation has nothing to do with you! Right now it's just me and my daughter trying to build this relationship!"

"So I'm supposed to share Rory but you get to keep April for yourself?" she cried, incredulous at what she was hearing.

"Right now, yes! Right now it's me and it's April!"

"And Anna," Lorelai said in a thin, brittle voice he didn't even recognize.

"What?"

"You, and April, and Anna!"

"Are you trying to imply something?" he demanded.

"I just think it's strange that as soon as this woman from your past―this gorgeous, sexy woman, I may add―shows up again, suddenly I'm coming in last in your life!"

"You can't be serious!"

Lorelai shrugged, trying to appear cool and unruffled, even as her heart thumped in her chest. "All I know is, instead of getting a lawyer and fighting for your share of April, or trying to work out a custody agreement with Anna, or even letting her know that you've got a stable family life in the wings with a fiancée and a house ready to move into, instead of doing any of that, you're desperate to keep the status quo. And the only reason I can think of for that is because you want it that way!"

Luke came close to her and got in her face. His voice took on his low and deadly tone, the one even worse than his rants. "I want you to hear me, Lorelai. Anna means nothing to me. At one point, I probably had some fond memories of her as a friend, as someone I used to care about. But those are gone since I found out about April. If I could somehow manage not to ever see her again, I would."

"But―"

"I'm not finished! I did not cheat on you with Anna. The thought never occurred to me. I have no desire to be with her. I did not leave you that night, after telling you I loved you, and go directly to my old lover and screw her! Does that sound familiar, Lorelai? Do you remember standing out in the street, telling me over and over that you loved me? And then, what, an hour or two later you were in _his_ bed? Is this ringing any bells for you? So don't pretend that there's any comparison between how I hurt you and how you destroyed me!"

Lorelai had raised her hands protectively during his angry tirade and had placed them over her ears, desperate not to hear the words she nevertheless felt she deserved. She bit her lips to keep from crying, but the tears squeezed out anyway.

Luke despised himself at that moment. He hated being so cruel to her, but he couldn't help it. The words were primed to come out of him.

Someone rapped sharply on their door and Luke stomped over to jerk it open.

"What?" he snapped, flinging open the door.

Standing in the hall were two men. The one who had knocked was in his 30's, dressed in a gray suit with 'Larry Carlisle, Manager' helpfully printed on his nametag. The other man was probably 10 years older than Larry, and although some inches shorter than Luke, he was heavier, more solidly built and much more intimidating, even without his police uniform and his hand casually resting on his gun holster.

Luke's eyes went wide and he tried to rid his face of any residual anger.

"Hi, folks," Larry said amiably. He introduced himself, then pointed to the other man. "This is my brother Russ, who's chief of police here. He stopped by to have a cup of coffee with me, and we thought we'd check in with you. Everything OK?"

Luke exhaled forcefully. "We're fine," he tried to say as non-threateningly as possible. He stole a glance at Lorelai, who had tucked her hair back behind her ears and was scrubbing at her face with her hands, trying to erase her tears.

"We're fine," she echoed, trying her best to smile her usually dazzling smile and failing.

Larry glanced at his brother before addressing Lorelai. "Mrs. Danes, could I have a word with you out in the hall?"

Lorelai flinched at the 'Mrs. Danes,' but didn't correct him, figuring that was the least of their worries. "Oh, sure!" she replied, shooting a questioning glance at Luke as she headed out the door.

Luke groaned inwardly, seeing that the chief of police had observed what looked like Lorelai seeking his permission to leave the room.

Once in the hall, Lorelai lost no time in trying to explain. "Larry, I'm really sorry if we were…" She paused, trying to find the right word. "Disruptive." She nodded. That sounded good. Descriptive, but not overly negative. "I own an inn, actually, in Stars Hollow, and I've had to call the county deputy a time or two myself. I never thought I'd be on the receiving end, though. One time we had a wedding, where everyone got really happy, if you catch my drift, and the father of the bride ended up in someone else's room, and then the mother of the bride walked in, and all hell broke loose. And another time, Cletus―he's a horse―got loose and sort of sat on a car…" Lorelai abruptly choked off the end of the story. "And you don't care, huh? Sorry, I sort of babble when I'm nervous. Not that there's anything for me to be nervous about. Being here, I mean. With Luke. We're fine," she finished, drawing a breath.

Larry studied her closely. "Russ really is my brother, and he really did just stop by to visit. One of the maids was walking past your room, and she was alarmed at the, uh, _volume_…of your conversation, and she came to inform me. We just want to make sure your visit is a pleasant one, and if we can help, we'd like to do that." His eyes drilled into Lorelai's.

"Look," she sighed. "The yelling? That's just what we do. At least, it's what we used to do. We've gone through some bad times recently, and we've forgotten how we used to be with each other. There are things we need to say to each other―some of them at a high volume, like all the way up to 11―to try and get to where we need to be. See, we live in a really small town, and if tried to do this there, everyone would be watching us. We came here so we could address our issues and try to make peace. I promise we'll hold it down to a dull roar, OK? I'm sorry we made a scene."

He fidgeted for a minute, trying to make up his mind. "Here's my card," he finally said, reaching in his pocket. "Even after you leave here, you can call me if you need help. In fact, while you're here, if you just yell 'Larry!' loud enough, someone will come get me," he added, smiling.

Lorelai grinned. "You know, it seems to me that yelling your name while I'm with Luke might be just the sort of thing that'd get me hit."

Larry looked alarmed.

"See, back home, those are the sort of crazy statements I'm known for," Lorelai explained, groaning. "People laugh and roll their eyes. I know you don't know me or Luke at all, but he's really a kind, gentle guy. He can rant with the best of 'em, but that's all it amounts to. He came to a caterpillar's funeral for my daughter―and brought brownies! He took his nephew in and gave him a home when no one else would. He hasn't let Marilyn Crane pay full price in his diner for over three years, because he knows she's just scraping by since her husband died. And…" Lorelai sighed, "if he ever, ever was going to hit me, he would've done it a couple of months ago when I told him I'd cheated on him. But he didn't. And he never would," she insisted.

Larry absorbed the confidence in her face, contrasted it with the heartbroken woman he'd first spied inside the room, and made the decision to believe her. "OK," he said. "I just don't want to read about you in the paper someday, and wish I'd done something more."

"Never. Well, we might be in the paper someday," and here Lorelai flashed him her real smile, "but never for anything like that!"

Larry nodded as he reached for the door to open it, and they headed back inside.

Luke was sitting on the edge of the bed, his arms folded across his chest. Russ leaned against the desk, calmly watching Luke.

Russ and Larry exchanged a look, and Russ casually pulled himself upright. "You folks have a pleasant visit," he said, exiting the door.

"Call if you need anything," Larry added, as he too, went out the door, with one last hard look at Lorelai.

"Thank you!" she called, closing the door firmly behind them. "Whew!" she said, leaning against it with her back.

"What did you say?" Luke asked anxiously.

"I said that you were a sweetheart, wouldn't hurt a fly, and that there was absolutely no need whatsoever to check with the Litchfield police department, because you were provoked and had every reason to kick the crap out of the Sockman's car."

"Lorelai," he growled, not seeing the humor.

"And yes," she continued, "you did push Jess in the lake, and did physically threaten a 16-year-old boy, but again, you were provoked."

"Lorelai!"

"And I didn't even mention all of the people you've thrown out of the diner over the years. They had it comin'!"

He stopped himself from yelling her name a third time, knowing she was just letting off steam. He bit his lip and looked at the floor.

"Relax, Luke." She sounded tired suddenly. "I said I felt safer with you than anyone. That you'd never hurt me. At least, not like that. Not the way they meant."

He nodded, not knowing what else to say. Her words were true and he was ashamed. He was beginning to see how much he had hurt her with the whole April thing. And just a few minutes earlier, he'd taken a sort of sick pleasure in the way his words were pummeling her. He hung his head and rubbed at the back of his neck, sighing heavily.

"So what did you and Russ talk about?" she asked lightly.

"Nothing," he muttered.

"Nothing?"

"He said not one word. Not the whole time. He just sat and watched me." Luke made a face and Lorelai laughed.

"Well, I'm glad I got the talky brother, then!"

"Yeah." He sighed and stretched, rubbing his face tiredly. "You've got to be hungry. What do you say we go get some dinner? And maybe call a truce for the time being?"

"Sounds great," she agreed, and grabbed up her purse.

They walked quietly across the parking lot to the restaurant situated there. Reynold's Grill had a huge menu with a little bit of everything on it. It seemed like they'd barely gotten to the last page of the offerings when the waitress appeared to take their order.

"I bet I could order for you," Lorelai said, her eyes twinkling like they used to at Luke, the mischievous note in her voice.

"Go ahead," he said, trying not to let on what a relief it was to see her like that.

Lorelai smiled at the young girl. "The gentleman will have the grilled chicken salad, with the vinaigrette dressing on the side, and unsweetened iced tea, with lemon."

Luke smiled his approval, and gave a nod to the waitress to confirm that was indeed his order.

"Your turn," Lorelai stated, motioning to her menu.

"OK." Luke accepted her challenge, feeling confident. "The lady will have the bacon cheeseburger with extra cheese, no tomatoes. She'll want onion rings, fries, a vat of coffee, and a hot fudge sundae for dessert."

"Wow!" She let her mouth drop open in admiration. "It's like you know the real me! That's perfect, except change the cheeseburger to scrambled eggs," she corrected to the waitress. "Make the onion rings and fries into white toast, and change the coffee to ginger ale. I'd like the fresh fruit plate with that, and I'll let you know about the sundae later."

Once the waitress had walked away, Luke asked skeptically, "So, is that really what you wanted, or did you just want to prove me wrong?"

Lorelai gave a playful scowl and rubbed at her stomach. "I _want_ the cheeseburger, but I'm not sure Junior, here, would let me. So I opted for something bland until he settles down."

Luke felt like reality had just slapped him across the face. Somehow he'd managed to totally forget she was pregnant.

"I guess I never realized how much a woman has to change while she's pregnant," he said slowly.

"It's worth it, in the end," she said brightly, shrugging.

"You're a good mom," he said gruffly.

"I wasn't so much, with Rory," she confessed, in the easy way she'd always been able to talk to him. "I was so young, and so stupid! At first, I didn't know I was pregnant. Or more like I didn't want to admit that I was. So I ate crap and drank and did stupid stuff. But once the truth set in I read the books and tried my best. Mom had a cook then, Dolores, who liked me, and she'd make me the most amazing fruit drinks, and sneak in all sorts of healthy dishes that I ended up gobbling down. Luckily I wasn't the caffeine fiend that I am today. But I still think it's a miracle that Rory turned out the way she did."

"Rory was lucky," he insisted, "to have you. This baby's lucky. You're a good mom," he repeated firmly.

She gave another little half-shrug, and looked across the room, taking a deep breath before bringing her eyes back to fix on him. "Hey, Luke, I wanted to thank you for not asking me the one question I'm sure you were dying to."

His eyebrows pulled together. "What's that?"

"You know, if I'm sure."

He shrugged. "You showed me the tests. I figure you're as sure as you can be."

She licked her lips nervously. "No. I…I don't mean sure if I am. I mean sure that it's you."

Once again he felt like reality had kicked him in the head. Once she'd mentioned June third no other scenario had crossed his mind.

Lorelai rushed on, seeing his face. "I know you're too much of a gentleman to ever really question me, so I want to make it really clear that it was just that one, stupid night with Chris. I haven't seen him since. Really. And there hasn't been anyone else," she added, barely able to breath. "Just…Just June third."

"Stop it," he ground out. "I know you. I know you wouldn't do anything like that."

She laughed bitterly. "Yeah, I used to think that, too, but apparently I am exactly that kind of skanky whore."

He leaned across the table and grabbed her wrists. "Stop! Do you hear me?" He glared at her, his voice low but intense. "You will not say things like that about yourself!"

She held his eyes for a moment before dropping her gaze to the table, shrugging again. "Anyway, once I get to the doctor, she'll have ways of measuring and calculating that'll prove it, in case you've got doubts―"

He slapped his open palm against the table between them, effectively cutting her off and emphasizing his irritation. "Enough," he spat out. "I'm serious, Lorelai. One more word and I walk out the door."

She swallowed hard. "OK, but Luke, we need to be honest with each other. If you have questions or concerns about anything, I want you to bring them to me. I don't want you to go sit in some dark place and stew over them. I want us to be able to talk about anything."

With his mouth set he met her gaze. "I agree," he muttered. "But I don't want to hear you questioning your character again."

The awkward silence that followed had them both reaching for their water glasses.

After several sips, Luke broached another topic of discussion.

"I wanted to say that before, when I was talking about Rory, I was really always OK with the fact that she came first. I mean, that's the way it should be, and I knew that going in."

Lorelai's forehead crinkled as she tried to figure out his meaning. "First?" she questioned.

"Yeah, you know. First." He shifted uncomfortably. "Like, in your heart."

"Oh, Luke," she gasped, shaking her head slowly, stunned. "You think I love Rory more than you?"

"You love Rory more'n coffee," he forced a grin, trying to show how he really was OK with it.

She pressed her hands against the table, still shaking her head. "I'm so, so sorry you think that. I'm so, so sorry I never made it clear. But believe me, from Fiddler on the Roof time on, you guys have shared top billing. I have to admit, for most of my life I never thought it would happen, but it did. Now, if the two of you were drowning, I'd still probably save her first, but that's only because you're a better swimmer than she is. And plus, you'd kill me once I got you out and you found out I'd left her in the water." She smiled fully at him, her eyes shining.

"Yeah, I would," he agreed gruffly, caught up in the magic of her eyes. He felt like he could have sat there, feeling connected to her again, for a long, long time, but their food arrived then and broke the mood.

* * *

Once back in their room, Luke sat heavily down in one of the chairs at the table and watched as Lorelai examined the décor.

"Man, there's a lot of ducks," she muttered. "What's Larry thinking?"

Luke decided that this was the moment to plunge right in. "I think it's time we discussed what we're going to do about this baby." Nerves made his voice sound cold as steel.

Lorelai whipped her head around to stare at him, fire-red anger already flowing out. "If you think there's any chance in hell that I'm _not_ having this baby, you don't know me at all!" She advanced on him, her arms flailing.

He jumped up to meet her, grabbing her arms to hold them down. "Jesus, Lorelai! Do you honestly think I'd ever suggest such a thing to you? Do you not know me? This is _our_ baby! Ours!" He pressed one hand over her stomach, staking his claim.

He watched as she battled her emotions. Sanity slowly made a comeback, and she rested one hand over his. "Yeah," she said, sounding a little shaky. Her eyes met his and she blinked a few times. "Sorry. I didn't mean to jump down your throat. Of course I know. There was just something about the way you said it…Sorry."

She shook her head to clear it and disentangled herself from him, walking over to peer out the window as she further tried to calm her emotions.

"You know," she said, turning back to him, "I just realized I don't even know where we are. If you get totally fed up with me, how far is the taxi ride to get home?"

Well, he couldn't hide it any longer.

He swallowed hard. "Maryland," he sighed, and waited for it to hit her.

The air rushed out of her lungs, and she tried to suck some of it back.

"So…Maryland, huh? Wow. That's something," she gulped. "Forty-nine other states and you picked Maryland," she murmured, almost to herself.

"Well, you said we'd have to come here someday," he pointed out, hoping for the best.

She was stunned into silence, not able to believe he was throwing her words back at her from that night of the ultimatum.

"We're just over the border," he rushed on, when she didn't respond. "The town's called Havre de Grace. It's the duck decoy center of the world," he added, filling up the dead space in the conversation.

"Hence the ducks," she said, pointing.

"Hence the ducks," he nodded, waiting.

"Well, OK," she said slowly. "As long as there's a reason." She looked over and met his eyes.

He didn't look away. "I think we should get married," he stated, carefully not making it into a question. It wasn't a proposal in any way.

"Oy," she gasped, once again breathless. She made her way over to the bed she'd claimed, sinking down to sit on it. "Are you crazy?" she asked, faintly. "You are, aren't you? I've finally pushed you over the edge!"

"I'm not crazy," he insisted, rolling his eyes. He'd expected this. "It makes perfect sense. I want to be involved, and you won't be trying to take care of the baby on your own. We can make this work," he stated firmly.

Lorelai stared at him, a conflict raging inside. One part of her wanted to scream 'Yes!' about a million times and do a happy dance, thrilled that she was finally getting what she wanted all along. The other part of her, however, didn't want to get it this way. That part wanted Luke down on one knee, telling her he couldn't live without her, asking her to marry him because he wanted _her_; not because of the baby that was coming.

"That wouldn't be fair," she finally managed to spit out.

"Why not?"

"Because you'd be stuck in a marriage. To me," she added painfully. "What happens when you find whoever you should be with?"

He snorted a laugh. "You think I'm gonna get married and then start hittin' the clubs, looking for someone else? You think I'm gonna sign up for online dating? Come on!"

So not the response she was looking for. She averted her gaze, and Luke seemed to sense what she needed.

"Look." He sat down on his bed, facing her. "I've already told you that in spite of everything I still love you, and from the things you've said, I'm pretty sure you still love me. The two things I'm most certain about are that I want to take care of you, and I want to take care of the baby. So we get married, and legally I'm there to do just that."

"Luke, this is just so…so…" She couldn't even find the words to tell him how insane this was. "Before, you didn't want me anywhere around April. And now, you just want to spring a stepmother on her? Or will I be a stepmother in name only? Will you still entertain her privately at the diner?" She couldn't keep the snotty tone from coloring her words.

"I'll figure something out," he assured her. "I'll talk to Anna, and―"

"No! No! That's just―No!" Lorelai jumped up. "You marry me, there is no 'I.' There's 'we!' It becomes _our_ problem. _We_ deal with it!"

He worried his bottom lip. "I just don't know if Anna―"

She cut him off again. "I don't _care_ about Anna! I don't care if she has a problem with it! This is a woman who decided on her own to cut you out, Luke! She decided not to let you be a father! She didn't care about what you wanted, or what was right! Legally you have as much right to April as you do this baby! _God!_ Why won't you see that!"

"I do, Lorelai," he said quietly, not giving his frustrations voice the way she was. "I don't want to put April in the middle of a situation like that. I don't want her to ever have to choose, because you and I both know she'd choose her mom, just the way Rory'd choose you. And if the courts get involved, and tell her that she has to be with me for so much time during the year-this weekend, that holiday―I don't want her to grow up resenting me. I don't want to force her to see me. I'd rather suffer myself, and work it out with Anna, and save April from any of the nasty part."

"OK, so I admire that, Luke, I really do. But what happens when the baby gets here, and Anna decides that since I'm temporary, the baby is temporary, too, and she won't let April be around the baby? Then what?"

"That's not gonna happen," he stated darkly. In his mind, he'd already seen April holding the baby, asking millions of questions about infant care.

"But what if it does?" Lorelai persisted.

"Then I―" He stopped himself, paused, and turned to Lorelai with a more determined look. "Then _we_ go see Anna. And a lawyer, if necessary. We won't let that happen. I promise."

"OK," she said, a small glimmer of hope struggling to be seen on the far horizon. "But you know," she said slowly, not sure how much longer she could continue to fight against something she wanted so badly, "it's not the 1950's. It's not like we're going to be ostracized if we're not married. Hell, I've already done the whole 'unwed mother' thing. It's not that bad. You'll get used to it."

Luke shook his head emphatically. "I don't want it to be like that. I don't want that for the baby, or for you. I want to take a stab at doing this right."

Lorelai chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully, trying to land on a persuasive argument. "You know, when I got pregnant with Rory, Chris wanted to marry me. He wanted to do that 'right thing' too, but I wouldn't let him. I wanted him to go on and have his future."

"I'm not some 16-year-old kid, and neither are you. I know what I want, and it's trying to make a home for this baby. _That's_ my future!"

Lorelai leaned forward, forcing Luke to look her in the eye. "I do love you, Luke, I do. And it's because I love you that I don't want to see you forced into some sort of puritanical marriage sacrifice."

"It's not a sacrifice, Lorelai," he snapped. "It's duty. It's obligation. It's family!"

"Oh, my God," she muttered, taken aback. "You've turned into my father."

"I want to be_ in_ this, do you understand? I don't want to be on the outside, with my involvement limited to some timetable. I want to _be_ there!"

Lorelai's hackles started to rise. "You think I'd deny you access to the baby? You know that's not how I am! Of course I want you there! I want you involved!"

"Look, here's the deal," Luke said forcefully, tired of trying to explain it. "Either we get married, and I'm there 24/7, or I don't want to be there at all."

"What?" she asked, almost laughing. She figured his words had gotten twisted as they came out of his mouth, because he surely didn't mean what he'd just said.

"You heard me. Either we get married, and I'm this baby's father in every sense of the word, or I'm stepping away."

Her mouth opened in shock. "Luke," she chided him, still not believing he meant it.

The muscle in his jaw was working furiously. "Financially, I'd make sure you were covered. But otherwise, I'd be out."

"Luke." She tried again. "You don't mean that."

"Yes, I do, Lorelai." She saw the glint in his eye, the set jaw. "Either we get married, or I'm out."

Lorelai wet her lips nervously, feeling a little like the room was off-kilter. She tilted her head to one side, hoping that would help straighten things out, studying him.

"I thought you didn't like ultimatums," she finally said quietly.

"I don't like Mondays, either, but unfortunately they keep coming around." He quoted her own words back at her.

_What do you know. He was listening that night._

"Do you want to explain to me where this is coming from?" she asked softly.

He ran his fingers through his hair, looking around the room as he tried to find a way to explain.

"I've missed so much with April. _So damned much._ It's great that I get to see her now, but I still know how much I miss. When she stays with me I see the difference. I know if she wakes up cranky. I know what she eats for breakfast. I know if her shoelace breaks. I know who she calls for history class notes. I know if she needs a snack before bed. When she's not with me, I only hear the big things, like what grade she got on the test, or where they went on a field trip. I get cut out of all of those little, insignificant things that actually make up what life is. I don't want to miss the broken shoelaces with this kid, Lorelai." His voice cracked. "I couldn't stand it. So I can't do this halfway. It's all or nothing."

His voice was full of despair and heartbreak and almost more than she could stand. She wanted to say something to reassure him but the words refused to come out of her tightened throat.

He looked at her and knew. "It's not you," he insisted hoarsely. "I know you'd do your best. I know you'd be generous. It's just not enough." He paused, and then said with great effort, "I bet even Christopher would agree with me. If you'd ask him about the difference between being Rory's dad, and G.G.'s, he'd tell you." He shook his head slightly in disbelief. "And the last thing I'd ever want is for him to agree with me on anything, but he would."

The room was suddenly silent as both of them caught their breath for a moment.

"This is what I want," he then said with quiet conviction. "I want my shot at a family."

Lorelai let all of the air whoosh out of her lungs before drawing in another breath. This was crazy! This was so crazy! And yet, Luke was so sincere, so desperate in his plea to be with this baby; to be a family together. She just wanted it to be because of _her,_ not the baby.

"Do I have to give you an answer right now?" she ventured.

"No, you can think about it some." He waved his hand in the air, trying to be casual. "Take all the time you need, as long as you decide before Friday at 4:30."

"Why?" she asked, her heartbeat picking up speed again. "What's Friday at 4:30?"

"That's the latest that the clerk of the court can marry us, so I scheduled us in."

"You…" Once again, Lorelai was speechless. "You've flipped out," she finally sputtered out. "Totally, freakin' flipped."

He tried to explain. "Even though it's easier to get married here, you still have to wait two days, and I didn't know how long we could take the ducks, so I thought I'd make the appointment first and try to convince you later."

Luke's explanation was sincere and honest, and even a little sweet, but there was something about the mention of the ducks that pushed Lorelai over the edge. She could feel the laughter working its way up through her body and she had no choice but to let it out. Luke looked at her, with that special annoyed-but-inwardly-pleased look he saved just for her. She leaned against the desk, gasping with hysterical laughter, wiping her eyes.

"The ducks," she choked out, through her giggles, pointing at the carved wooden one. "Oy with the ducks already!"

Luke felt a smile breaking across his own face. He'd always found Lorelai's laughter contagious, and, he had to admit, what he was trying to talk her into was pretty ridiculous. He chuckled ruefully.

She looked at him, trying to come down from her laughing jag, shrugging her shoulders helplessly. On impulse, he stepped close to her and wrapped his arms around her in a fierce hug, letting his chin rub against her hair in the way that used to comfort them both.

"It's going to be OK, Lorelai," he said softly, next to her ear. "We'll make this work. I promise."

He held her close and she gradually quieted, giving herself up to the comfort of resting against him, feeling her bones melt as he gently rubbed her back, swaying slightly.

_I should step back_, she thought. _Let him know I'm OK, that he doesn't have to hold me anymore._ But she didn't move except to tuck her head deeper into the crook of his neck.

_I should let her go_, Luke thought. _I don't know if she really wants me touching her. But this is so nice, to hold her again._ So his arms tightened instead of releasing her.

Eventually he felt her yawn against him. "Tired?" he asked.

"Exhausted," she confirmed.

"Go get ready for bed," he told her. "We'll talk more about everything tomorrow." He gave her a gentle nudge.

She made a noise of protest as he withdrew his arms, but she gathered up her things and headed for the bathroom.

Luke pretended to be watching Sports Center when she came out. He was happy to observe that her powder blue pajama set was cute but not overtly sexy. He didn't know how he was supposed to handle sleeping in a room with Lorelai Gilmore and not actually sleeping _with_ her.

"You want to watch anything?" he asked, pointing at the TV.

"No," she groaned, crawling into her bed, her eyes already half-closed.

He turned it off and went in to get ready, and found that by the time he returned she was already sound asleep.

He stood for a moment just watching her, marveling at her beauty, his mind boggling at the fact that inside her gorgeous body a baby was already taking shape. He tore his gaze from her and turned off the lights, shaking his head a little at the wonder of second chances.

* * *

Lorelai was struggling towards consciousness, her eyelids fluttering. Suddenly there was something pressed against her lips. Something dry and rectangular.

"Don't open your eyes," he voice ordered quietly. "Just open your mouth and eat this."

A grin jumped across her face. "Dirty!" she observed, but obediently kept her eyes closed and let him feed her. She could feel his warmth hovering beside her. As she chewed, she put up her hand.

"What are you doing?" He jerked to one side, trying to avoid getting poked in the eye.

"Trying to find your mouth," she said, hoping she wasn't spitting cracker crumbs at him.

"Why?" he asked bewildered.

"I want to find out if you're smiling." Her fingers finally connected with her goal and she ran the tips of them over his mouth, smiling herself as she detected his smirk. She could feel his heart rate increase, too. Good, because _her_ body was certainly wide awake.

As soon as she polished off that cracker, he brought another one to her mouth.

"So," she observed, munching, "you brought me saltines."

She could feel the Luke Danes' patented aw-shucks-it-wasn't-anything shrug. "Well, you said they helped, and I had extra in the storeroom."

Another cracker was pressing against her lips, but she put her fingers around it.

"I think I can take it from here, thanks," she said.

She opened her eyes to the treat of Luke's crystal clear blue ones twinkling right over her. Her heart started to beat even faster.

"You brought me crackers," she said again, her voice so tender, swallowing hard.

"No big deal," he said.

"Yeah, Luke, it is, and the fact that you don't think so is what makes you you." She carefully swallowed, and then ran her fingers over her mouth, making sure all traces of cracker crumbs were gone. "So, that suggestion you made last night. Is it still on the table?"

"Yes," he said, holding his breath.

She nodded, looking down at the sleeve of crackers pressed against her side. Then she looked up, meeting his eyes again.

"Then I'll marry you, Luke."

"Good," he said, sounding relieved and panicked at the same time. "That's good."

She smiled up at him tremulously, waiting for him to kiss her.

But the kiss never came.


	5. Rings and Recriminations

**Note:** This chapter begins immediately after the "kiss that didn't come." For those of you with weak hearts, this is the last 'rough' chapter. Things start looking up really soon - I promise! As always, thanks for reading!

* * *

Lorelai had lived her life learning how to cover her tracks. When you're the type of person who opens her mouth on a daily―sometimes hourly―basis and wildly inappropriate things coming pouring out, you learn how to twist them to your advantage. You learn how to recover. You learn how to never let 'em see you sweat.

So before the moment could lengthen much further into awkwardness, waiting for that kiss that Luke obviously didn't want to bestow on her, she scooted herself upright on the bed, leaning her shoulders back against the headboard. She shifted her focus away from his uneasy eyes and to the cellophane length of crackers instead, pulling out another and bringing it to her lips. Munching it gave her mouth something to do.

"Well, since you're the one with a plan here, what's next?" she asked, chewing.

"I figured you'd want to call Rory."

That brought chewing to a halt. "Rory?" she questioned tentatively.

"I figured you'd want her here." He smiled sheepishly at her. "I know there's no way you'd do something like this without Rory here."

The warmth she always felt when he made it apparent how much he cared for Rory broke over her.

"We're not much more than an hour away from her. Hopefully she can make it here tomorrow."

Lorelai felt her eyes open wide in panic, and she forced what was left of the cracker down her throat. Tomorrow. They were really getting married tomorrow. She was really pregnant, and she had really agreed to marry Luke for all the wrong reasons, and now she had to call her daughter and explain this crazy plan and make it sound plausible. Sure. Easy.

She moved the sleeve of crackers to the bedside table as she shifted her position nervously. She licked the salty taste off her lips and cleared her throat, pushing her hair back behind her ears.

"Luke, are you sure…Are you sure this is what you want?"

"I know this is what I want," he said firmly, handing her the phone.

She nodded, trying to absorb some of the confidence radiating out from him. She opened her phone, but snapped it back shut almost immediately.

Sighing, she tried to explain. "I don't want to tell her all this over the phone. Of course I want her to be here. But telling her we're suddenly back together and getting married and she's got a sibling on the way…It's too much. Let me get her here and then we'll break everything to her in person. I just…I don't want you to think I'm trying to hide stuff from her. It's just too much at once."

Luke considered, and then nodded. "You're probably right. I'll leave that up to you."

Lorelai glanced over at the clock. "I can maybe get her before she leaves her room." She took a deep breath as she pushed Rory's number and forced a sunny look onto her face.

"Hey, Kid!" she cried out, striving to hit her normal level of happiness in talking with her daughter. "How's it hangin'?"

Luke gave his head a little shake and went to get ready for the day, leaving Lorelai privacy for her talk with Rory.

Twelve minutes later she slumped back against the bed, exhausted. She knew Rory was suspicious, but she'd finally accepted Lorelai's explanation that she hadn't gotten sick after all but had instead felt the overwhelming desire to flee Stars Hollow, and had landed in this ducky little town on the Chesapeake which Rory now needed to come share with her.

"She'll be here tomorrow afternoon," she muttered tiredly to Luke, who had emerged from the bathroom completely dressed, his hair still damp from the shower.

"She knows how to get here?" he asked worriedly.

"I'm sure she's Mapquesting as we speak," she assured him. "I told her there was a fabulous restaurant, so she needed to bring along something nice to wear. So…I guess now we need to find a fabulous restaurant."

"Sure," he agreed. He moved over to the dresser to put on his watch.

"Are you calling April now?" she challenged him.

"What?" His head shot up to look at her in the mirror over the dresser.

"Well, my daughter is going to be here. Don't you want your daughter here?"

"I…" He finished strapping on his watch, then turned to face her. "I hadn't really thought about it."

"Really?" she questioned. She focused her gaze across the room. "You haven't thought about it or you still don't want her around me?"

"I hadn't thought about it," he said shortly. "And frankly, I don't see any way to get her here. I can hardly call her mother and ask her to drive her four hours to get here on such short notice. That would probably just be asking for trouble. We'll tell her when we get back."

Lorelai shook her head. "That seems wrong."

"Look." Luke put his hands on his waist and slowly scanned the room as he got his thoughts together. "I like April. I really do. It doesn't seem weird to have her around now. And I think she's warming up to me, but our…relationship…it's not really like a father and daughter yet. We're trying. But I really don't think it's to the point yet where it matters whether or not she'll be here."

Lorelai's mouth opened in disbelief. "Luke, of course it matters! You don't think that she'll be hurt at being left out? Because trust me, I know what that feels like, and it hurts!"

"We're not leaving her out," he muttered. He didn't appreciate Lorelai reminding him that he'd hurt her already this morning, nor did he care for her once again pointing out that he was doing this fathering thing wrong. He took a deep breath and buried the irritation he was feeling. "I don't see any way to make it happen, so let's just make the best of it, OK?"

She squeezed her eyes shut, knowing it was wrong, and once again knowing that she was locking down her own feelings to keep him happy. "OK," she sighed, capitulating.

He opened the door and picked up the newspaper lying in the hall for them. She got out of bed and started gathering her things to get dressed.

"What's next on the agenda?" she tried to ask lightly, trying to move beyond their first disagreement of the day.

"Well, breakfast," he said, smiling at her enthusiastic thumbs-up to that idea. "Then, probably shopping."

"Shopping?" she squeaked, stunned.

"You didn't pack a wedding dress, did you?" he kidded her, a half-second before his internal censor kicked on.

"No, I didn't." She steeled herself against visualizing her perfect dress hanging forlornly in her closet at home.

He hurried past his thoughtless words. "Well, we need to go find you something pretty to wear, then. Probably some shoes, too," he added, trying to sweeten the pot.

Her eyes started to shine a little bit. "You'll go shoe shopping with me?"

"I'll do anything you want me to today," he promised.

She grinned then, her full-on Lorelai grin. "You may live to regret that," she teased.

He grinned back at her. "I expect nothing less," he confirmed.

* * *

They found the dress in the third store, which was two stores too many as far as Luke was concerned, but he agreed that the dress was perfect. It didn't look like anything Lorelai would normally wear but she decided to try it on just for fun, and when she came out of the dressing room, her eyes totally shining in deliglht, they both knew it was the one.

It was ice-blue, with an empire waist and a handkerchief hem, cap sleeves and a scooped neckline edged with just a little bit of white lace. It laced up the back and looked as if the designer had fitted it specifically to Lorelai's measurements. The blue made her eyes dance and altogether it looked like a dress special enough to get married in.

They had to compromise on the shoes. Luke nixed the pair with the high, high heel that Lorelai swooned over, already worried about her tripping while pregnant. Her scoffing couldn't dissuade him, so she at last conceded defeat and went with a white dressy sandal that was her second choice.

Back out on the street, Luke carrying their bags, Lorelai could barely contain her shopping high. "What's next?" she chirped, practically skipping along beside him.

He found he just couldn't do grumpy today, not with her like this. "Jewelry store," he stated, with a little grin.

That stopped her in her tracks. "Jewelry?" she gasped.

In response, he picked up her left hand, pointing at her ring finger.

"Oh," she said, stunned. "Of course."

Luke had consulted a map of the retail area and led her into a fine jeweler's he'd seen listed.

As soon as they stepped inside, Lorelai zeroed in on the wedding ring case. In no time she was quipping a mile a minute with the young female salesperson, trying on ring after ring.

Luke smiled, not bothered by the fact that she was trying on rings that were probably worth more than the diner and the Dragonfly combined. He knew that this was just like her wanting to taste every possible wedding cake combination, even though she already knew what she wanted before she stepped in the door. He knew she'd select something gorgeous, but reasonable.

He stepped over to the far end of the case, and an older man instantly came over to assist him.

"Could I see that one?" Luke asked, pointing to a plain silver band.

"Certainly," the man said, unlocking the case and pulling out the display Luke had pointed out.

Lorelai was suddenly right at his side. "You're getting a ring?" Her voice almost sounded accusing.

"Well, yeah," he told her mildly. "I'm getting married too."

She blinked a few times, astonished. "You want to wear a wedding ring?"

"Sure," he shrugged.

She couldn't keep the words from spilling out. "You didn't before."

He grimaced. "Yeah, well, neither did Nicole."

"But you want to, this time."

"Well, it's a real marriage this time."

_Is it?_ Lorelai wanted to scream. Instead she looked at the smooth silver band Luke was turning around on his hand.

He nodded his approval to the salesman. "I run a diner, and I do some woodworking. I don't want anything that I'm going to have to worry about while I'm doing that."

"Let's see about the size," the salesman said, bringing out the finger-sizing gauge.

Lorelai stared at the dull gray rounds the man was pushing on Luke's finger to find the correct size. She thought there was little difference between them and the actual ring Luke had picked out.

The jeweler found the ring he needed down below the display case and pulled it out to show Luke. Luke, in turn, held it in his hand, scrutinizing it. He gave a nod of approval and then held it out to show Lorelai.

She took a sharp breath, staring at the plain silver band before turning to the jeweler. "I want one to match."

"Lorelai, no," Luke protested. "Just because this is what I want doesn't mean that you have to. Pick out something pretty for you. Get what you want."

"I want this," Lorelai said stubbornly, pointing at his ring. "I want to match."

"Lorelai." Luke's voice was taking on that note of total exasperation. "This ring looks nothing like you. I want you to pick out something for you."

"I pick this," she insisted.

He tried again, bending his head closer to hers to talk more privately. "You know what my day is like. My hands are in grease and hot water all day. I don't want to be wearing anything that I have to worry about, but that doesn't mean you do. I know there are at least a dozen rings over there that suit you better. I want you to pick out something that'll make you happy to wear it."

"This will make me happy." She pointed again at the plain band and firmly nodded at the jeweler.

"Cecily," the jeweler called to his associate. When she stepped over, he pointed to an area in the display case and then to Lorelai. "Why don't you show the lady some of these wedding bands right here? I believe they may be a close match." He then moved out from behind the counter and moved towards another display case in the center of the room. "Sir," he said to Luke, "if I may?"

When Luke joined him, the man smiled kindly. "It's my experience with brides, sir, that when they get that particular tone in their voice, it's suicide to try and reason with them anymore. It usually just makes things worse for the groom."

Luke sighed wearily. "Yeah," he agreed, resigned.

"This may be a solution for you, in the future." The jeweler tapped on the case, drawing Luke's attention to the rings showcased inside.

He didn't expect to be interested in whatever it was the man wanted to show him, but a ring made up of alternating square diamonds and oval sapphires instantly caught his eye.

"These are called eternity bands," the jeweler explained. "They're often given on an anniversary, or on the birth of a child, to show the wife that you'd marry her all over again." He followed Luke's line of vision to the ring featuring the sapphires. "With her eyes, that would be an excellent choice," he confirmed.

"I'll keep that in mind," Luke told him.

"Very good," the jeweler said, "because believe me," and here he motioned towards Lorelai, "you will not win this battle today."

Luke had to chuckle a little bit at that. "No," he agreed. "I never expect to win a battle with her."

The man smiled at him conspiratorially. "Well, if you've already learned that lesson, then I predict a long and happy marriage for the two of you."

In short order the rings were purchased and they were back outside on the sunny sidewalk, the two velvet boxes tucked safely into Luke's pocket.

The sun was shining just as brightly as it had been a little earlier, the flowers planted in containers along the storefronts were just as cheery, and just as many duck-themed window displays were available for mocking, but Lorelai was silent. Eerily silent. Luke soon felt the burden of whatever was weighing on her pressing against him.

"You OK?" he asked cautiously. He wondered if she was feeling queasy again and didn't want to spoil their outing.

She shot him a quick, guilty smile; the fake one that he detested. "Sure. Great," she said airily, with just a hint of sarcasm.

He stopped abruptly. "Come on, tell me. What's wrong?"

She didn't try to smile anymore. She opened her mouth, but then snapped it back closed. "Nothing," she said, sounding defeated.

Luke shook his head vigorously. "No, we're not doing this anymore. Tell me," he insisted.

Her eyes darted nervously across the street to some colorful banners flying in the wind coming off the sea. The same breeze made her push her hair out her face. With a deep sigh she turned to him. "You married her," she said simply.

"Yes, I know," he said snidely. "I was there."

He watched as Lorelai's face swiftly transformed into that mask she'd worn for most of the spring. She swallowed hard, nodding, and turned to continue on down the sidewalk.

He closed his eyes momentarily, kicking himself mentally. Hard.

"Wait," he said gruffly, reaching for her arm. "I'm sorry. I don't want it to be like this between us anymore. I want you to talk to me." His fingers caressed her skin where he was touching her arm, just a little. "I'll listen. I promise."

Her hand fluttered up to her hair again, nervously, while her eyes skittered over the displays across the street. "How did she do it?" she finally asked, softly. "How did she get you to marry her?"

His lips pressed together, grimly. "We've talked about this a million times."

"No. No, we haven't," Lorelai disputed, finding some long-lost backbone. "We talked about it once, that first night you told me, that night you were helping me get Rory packed up for Yale. And then, after we got engaged, I think there was one quick reference from you, something along the lines of how I was it for you. But we haven't really talked about it at all." She tossed him a defiant look.

Luke's eyes focused far-off down the street, wishing they were still on their lighthearted shopping trip. He knew this was important. He also knew this was a discussion he didn't want to have. He knew if he truly wanted Lorelai and a chance at making this work that they needed to start breaking down the walls around all of the topics they'd skillfully managed to ignore over the years. He recognized that this was a turning point. He was just terrified at turning the wrong way.

He spotted a small park in the next block, with a bubbling fountain and benches scattered around it. He nudged Lorelai, pointing towards it. "Let's go sit down," he suggested.

Once they were settled, he crossed his arms across his chest, resigned. "What do you want to know?" he sighed.

Nerves swarmed over her, nearly making her teeth chatter. "Whose idea was it?" she managed to ask. "Did she ask you, or did you ask her?"

She regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. She wasn't sure she could take it if Luke had indeed been the one to ask Nicole to marry him. On the other hand, if Nicole asked Luke, then that meant that Nicole was more like Lorelai than she wanted to admit. She held her breath, waiting on his reply.

Luke reached a hand up to the back of his neck, rubbing it, trying to buy some time as he tried to find the words to explain something he didn't understand himself. "I don't think either of us did," he finally muttered.

Lorelai looked at him sharply. "I don't think that's possible," she pointed out.

Luke shrugged his shoulders, staring at the water dancing in the fountain. "Everything I told you about that damned cruise was true. It was like being outside of reality. Like an alternate universe, or something. It was like none of the normal rules applied. You had to be in love or you were a freak. The first night, when we sat down to dinner, all of the other couples at our table jumped on the fact that this was our first trip together. They all were teasing us about how we'd be engaged by the time we got back to port. Somewhere along the line…It just seemed like it was true."

"Come on," Lorelai scoffed.

Luke gave his head a shake, as though he was trying to shake off those memories, and turned to look at Lorelai's doubtful face. "There was this one couple, Cindy and Ben, from San Diego. They were celebrating some big anniversary. One night they came roaring into dinner, all excited. They said they'd spoken to the captain, and he'd agreed to marry us. Everyone jumped into the planning. The women took Nicole off to get her hair and nails done. The guys took me drinking―not that you had to work to do that. There was booze everywhere, all the time. And somehow, it just seemed real." He rubbed at his jaw, still trying to find a way to explain it. "I was pretty sure I hadn't proposed. But I thought maybe she had. And I didn't want to back out and hurt her feelings. And I think she felt the same way, that maybe we'd come to this agreement and we just didn't remember." He sighed again. "If it makes you feel any better, I never discussed it with her, either."

Lorelai studied him, trying to remember what he looked like when he told the truth. "Did you love her?" she asked. Stunned at the words that had popped out without forethought, she clapped a hand over her mouth.

He cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably. "I liked her. She really seemed to like me, which was an ego boost for me at the time. She made things different. And," here he turned and gave her a suddenly intense look, "she wasn't you."

Her mouth dropped open. "What's that mean?"

"It means…" He squeezed his eyes shut, forcing himself to give up all pretense. "It means, I didn't want to go on the damn cruise at all, Lorelai. I wanted you to tell me not to go. I wanted you to tell me to stay in the diner, where I belonged, and wait for you to come back home."

Lorelai was staggered for a brief moment, but irritation soon overpowered surprise. "And how was I supposed to know that? Why didn't you just say that to me, instead of being all coy and asking me if you should go or not? I mean, I didn't think Nicole was right for you, but you seemed all happy with her! Why would I try to wreck that for you?"

"Because you loved me!"

That brought her up short. "I'm not sure that I did, then," she admitted, softly. "I…I was pretty confused. I knew I really didn't like her. I knew that the thought of you…_with_ her…drove me crazy. But it wasn't until later, when you tried to patch things up with her, that I started to wonder what my feelings were, exactly."

Luke glanced at her coldly. "Exactly," he said, with a bitter laugh.

"What?" she frowned.

"That's exactly why I went with her on the cruise. That's why it was good she wasn't you. She had it figured out, and I didn't know if you ever would. So I liked her, and she liked me, and I thought that would be good enough. I was wrong, of course, but that's what I thought."

"Luke," she protested. "Why didn't you just tell me?"

It was his turn to scoff. "And watch you run the other way?"

"You don't know that."

"Yeah, I do," he said snottily. "I had years of watching you do that."

Lorelai took a moment to get her thoughts together. "You didn't love her. But you married her."

He gave a curt nod.

"You loved me," she said quietly, to herself. "But you wouldn't marry me."

His angry posture deflated. "Yeah," he agreed sadly.

Lorelai was blinking hard. "That's what I still don't understand," she nearly whispered.

"What?" he nudged her, curious.

"I begged you to marry me, Luke." She fought against the tears, and won, although her voice sounded raw. "You married her, even though you say you didn't love her. Supposedly you loved me. But you said no to me. You wouldn't marry me. Why not? What did I do to make you not want to marry me? You married her, Luke! Why not me?" She was gulping in deep breaths of air and shaking by the end of her distraught query.

"Lorelai, that night…" He trailed off, unsure. "Long before that night, you weren't yourself. I couldn't even find you for a couple of days, remember? And then you suddenly showed up, talking like a crazy person; looking like a crazy person…" He shook his head. "I wasn't sure what was wrong, but I sure as hell knew getting married wasn't going to solve it. I'd already gotten married for the wrong reasons. I wasn't going to do it again."

Lorelai was shaking her head sadly. "You didn't know what was wrong," she sighed, again mostly to herself.

Luke started to say something, but changed his mind, clamping his lips together.

"Really?" she asked, a new infusion of strength shooting through her. "You really didn't know what was wrong." She made it a statement, even though her face was bathed in disbelief.

He looked away. Took a deep breath. Rubbed at the knees of his jeans. "I knew," he admitted at last, quietly.

She nodded at that, grateful for his honesty. "So marrying Nicole was wrong," she stated, to sum up.

He nodded.

"And marrying me then, in May, would have been wrong."

He hesitated, but nodded.

She turned her body to face him. "But getting married now is right?"

His face set in the stubborn lines she knew so well. "Yes," he insisted.

She looked away. "Because of the baby," she said flatly.

"Because of the baby," he agreed, "and because I…I don't know how to be without you, Lorelai. I don't even _want_ to know how to do that. I've tried it, and it hurts too much." He looked at her defiantly, daring her to dispute him.

"Oh," she breathed out, his words smacking her straight in the heart. Her hand was all at once cradling his cheek, and she swallowed down most of the emotion she was feeling with difficulty. "Yeah, being without you pretty much sucks," she said, striving for a light tone to offset the heavy conversation.

His shoulders relaxed and he leaned into her hand, his eyes locked onto hers.

Suddenly self-conscious, they pulled apart.

"So," Lorelai said briskly, "good talk."

"Yeah," Luke agreed, amazement coloring his words, "it was."

She smiled at him then, her real smile. "Well, then, we should do it again sometime," she decreed, her voice full of the flirty tone he used to hear all the time.

* * *

The rest of the day went by smoothly. They stopped and got Lorelai some sort of frothy fruit drink at a frozen yogurt place, which Luke had determined was the healthiest snack on the menu. He rolled his eyes, but let Lorelai wheedle him into a cone filled with mini chocolate chip cookies, too. They made it back to their room, Lorelai yawning, and Luke left her there to take a nap while he went to scout out some more things about the town.

Later they asked Larry for some restaurant recommendations and went to dinner at the one on the top of his list. It was mercifully light on the ducks but strong on the menu and both of them found plenty of dishes to rave about. They agreed that they'd bring Rory here.

Tomorrow.

After the wedding.

Luke took a gulp of his beer. Lorelai guzzled her lemonade.

It still didn't seem real.

Still later, they were back in their room, tucked into their individual beds like some 50's sitcom characters. Lorelai wasn't tossing and turning, but she was light-years away from falling asleep as her mind circled around and around.

Finally, she worked up her nerve. "Luke?" she whispered, in case he really was asleep.

"What?" he grumbled. Sleep was eluding him, too.

"I just…" She expelled a huge breath, steeling herself to get the words out. "There's just something I need to know. And it's fine, it's really fine, if that's the way it is. I mean, I'd totally understand if you never want to touch me again. That would be a perfectly reasonable reaction on your part. I just - I need to know. So that I don't make a fool of myself sometime in the future." Now that the words were out, hanging there between them, she held her breath.

She heard him go still while she spoke, then saw his shadowy upper body jerk upright.

"You think I don't _want_ to touch you?" he hissed, incredulous. "You think if I could have managed to _not_ touch you that night, that we'd even be in this situation now? Yeah, right, Lorelai," he added sarcastically, "I don't want to touch you at all."

She frowned at something he seemed to be implying, and she pushed herself up in bed as well, facing him in the dark. "Do you think…Did you somehow get it in your head that I wasn't a willing participant that night? Do you think you forced me, somehow? You know that's not true! Did you not hear me that night, what I said to you?"

"Yeah, I heard you," he said shortly. "But that doesn't make it right. I had no business being with you that night, Lorelai!"

Before she could even think about how to respond to that, more words came wrenching up out of him.

"I…I need to know. I've tried not to think about it, but I need to know. I have to know if that's the way it was with him that night."

She gasped, shocked that he wanted to talk about it.

"I keep seeing you," he continued, his voice hollow with pain, "the way you were that night, out on the street, begging me…And it was the same way, the night Paul Anka died. You were…shattered. Broken. Hysterical. And I just have to wonder, if that's why…if that's how…he ended up trying to comfort you."

Lorelai couldn't seem to catch her breath. "I don't know," she finally said, dully.

Luke didn't say anything more. He _couldn't_ say anything more because the anguish had tightened around him. He balled up his fists, waiting on her.

"I wish I knew," she finally whispered.

"What?" he asked, nearly terrified to hear.

"I wish I knew," she repeated, still faint. "I wish to God I knew what happened that night. I wish to God I knew how I was able to hurt you like that. I wish…I wish I knew _how_ I was able to destroy us like I did. I wish I knew what I told myself that made it OK. I mean, we're all supposed to have some sense of self-preservation, right? So how was I able to sabotage myself the way I did? I had to have known how much pain my actions were going to cause! So how did I do it?"

"I don't know," he told her, heartbroken.

The sound of the pain in his voice pushed her closer to the edge. "I remember…us. And you were right, I was acting like a crazy person." She tried to get herself back into control. "I remember thinking that I had to get out of town, I had to get away from you, because if I stayed there, knowing that you didn't want me...that you didn't come after me…I'd lose it completely. So I jumped in the car and I just started driving. I didn't know where to go. I'd just been with Chris at my parents' and that seemed logical somehow, to go ask him for help."

She paused for a moment, trying again to peel away the fuzziness that shrouded that night. "I remember knocking on his door. I remember soothing G.G. back to sleep, because I woke her up when I first got there. I remember him getting out a bottle of tequila, and telling me―" She broke off the thought abruptly.

"Told you what?" Luke prodded her, his tone harsh.

"The usual crap you say when a friend gets dumped." She tried to sound normal. "You know, you're too good for him; he didn't deserve you; blah, blah, blah." She rubbed at her forehead. "I remember thinking that if you didn't want me, that if that was true, then everything I believed was upside down. My whole life was shattered into these little pieces that didn't fit together anymore. I felt so empty. I felt… so…alone. Cold." Her voice faded out.

"And he was there," Luke stated painfully.

"God, Luke, why won't you listen to me!" She sprang out of bed, agitated, rubbing her bare arms frantically. "I don't know! I don't remember! I wish to God I did, but I don't! I don't know how I ended up doing the one thing that was guaranteed to destroy us! I don't know! I don't know! I don't know!" A sound of utter despair tore out of her throat as she slumped down on the edge of the bed. "I don't know!" she cried out once more, pitifully.

He recoiled at the note of hysteria once again in her voice. He heard her trying to stifle the sobs tearing out of her. And once again, he had no choice but to try and comfort her. He tossed his covers aside and swung his legs over the edge of the bed, towards her.

"Hey," he said gently. He found her knees in spite of the dim light and gave them a squeeze. She tried to shy away from him, ashamed, but he moved over to sit beside her, putting his arm around her shoulders and pulling her head down on his. "It's OK, Lorelai. It's good we're talking about this. This is exactly what we need to do. But you need to calm down, now. This isn't good for the baby, you being this upset. Shh," he soothed her, petting her hair.

She straightened up when he mentioned the baby, and wiped her face. "Yeah," she agreed, leftover sobs still trying to shudder out of her.

He held her until she quieted completely, and then helped her slide back under her covers. He climbed back into his bed, staring at the ceiling with the strange patterns of light coming through the curtains in the room.

A long time passed, and he thought she'd fallen asleep. It startled him when her voice suddenly broke the silence again.

"There's just one thing I still need to say, Luke, and you need to hear me on this," she said with determination. "I hate myself for what I did. I hate myself so much for hurting you."

"Lorelai, don't―"

"No," she insisted. "You need to hear this. You need to believe this. Because I'm growing a baby. I'm this baby's caretaker. And I know that babies can pick up on everything the mother is feeling, so it's important that the baby not sense how much I despise myself. So starting tomorrow, I'm taking all that hate and I'm locking it away someplace where the baby can't feel it. That's why it's important that you hear me now. When you look at me, and I seem OK, you need to remember how I really feel about what I did. I'll always feel ashamed, even if it doesn't seem like it. I'll always remember. I'll always regret it. I'll always hate how I hurt you." Her voice was calm and decisive when she finished. "Do you understand?" she asked quietly.

He gritted his teeth. "Yes," he told her.

"All right then," she said, sounding relieved.

More minutes passed by in the dark. "Goodnight," Lorelai finally mumbled softly, and turned to face the wall.

"'Night," he responded. He laid there awake for a long time more, wondering why he couldn't tell her that he knew exactly what it felt like to hate yourself.

* * *

**Story Alert!** Happy chapter coming! Happy chapter coming!


	6. Wedding Day, Part Deux

**Notes:** When I first posted this chapter, I remember saying that it practically killed me, and it did. I was so nervous about it. Just like most brides in real life, I wanted everything to be perfect for Lorelai and Luke in their fictional world, too, and although I didn't actually spill blood over this chapter, I sure sweated and shed tears while trying to get it just right. Reading it again now after so much time has passed, I still think it does the job. Hope you all like it, too.

* * *

Lorelai leaned forward, examining her face critically in the mirror, and tried to stifle a groan. Last night's late-night confessional had not left her with the rosy-cheeked complexion a bride was supposed to have.

She got up and raised the blinds on the window, letting more light into the room to aid her in putting on correcting make-up. She gave a little twirl before she sat back down, loving the way her dress swished around her legs.

A thrill shot through her. It was really her wedding day. Ill-advised or not, she _was_ going to be Mrs. Lucas Danes by tonight.

Someone knocked on the door, making Lorelai's heart leap. She scrambled to see a clock. It couldn't be Rory already, could it? She bit at her lip. Of course it would be her uber-punctual daughter. Who else?

She rushed to the bathroom door. "Luke!" she hissed through it. "I think Rory's here!" Water was running, so she wasn't sure if he heard her or not.

There was another rap at the door, plus a "Mom!" called out in Rory's voice. Lorelai took a deep breath, rubbing her cheeks as she hurried to the door. She ordered her eyes to sparkle and her face to look happy in the split second before she threw it open.

"Rory!" she cried, opening her arms.

Rory tumbled through the door, a garment bag thrown over her arm and her ever-present backpack slung over her other shoulder. She still managed to get her arms around her mother, though, squeezing her tightly.

"You still remember me?" she grinned, trying to sound dramatic.

"I think so," Lorelai confirmed, holding her first baby. She pushed the thick bangs off of her forehead. "I'm still not used to these, but I recognize this sweet widdle face," she teased.

Rory unburdened herself and turned to get her first really good look at her mother. She blinked twice at the dress Lorelai had on.

"Wow," she said, pointing. "You went all out. How fancy is this restaurant?"

"It's…It's nice." Lorelai could feel her smile getting strained, and she put greater effort into appearing carefree. "And it's just nice to get all dressed up sometimes, you know?"

Rory's face started to do that calculating thing, where her eyebrows pulled together and her lips drew into a thin line.

"So you found the place OK, huh?" Lorelai rushed on. "How was traffic?"

Before Rory could answer, the bathroom door opened and Luke stepped out, tucking his t-shirt down into his dress pants. He stopped abruptly when he registered Rory's presence.

"Rory," he breathed out, shooting Lorelai a shocked look.

Rory's mouth dropped open. She turned to her mother. "Mom?" Her voice had just a slight edge of panic in it.

Lorelai's brain decided that flustered hostess was the way to go. "Luke, Rory's here. A little early," she said, stating the obvious.

"What's going on?" Rory asked, trying to be calm.

"Rory." Lorelai blew out a breath. "Luke and I…we're trying…We've decided to try again."

"You're going to _try?_" Rory asked, her voice going up shrilly on the last word. "What's that mean?"

"It…It means we're talking, and we're trying to find a way to be together again, and we're―"

"We're getting married," Luke jumped in.

Lorelai groaned and put her hands over her eyes.

Rory's shocked face looked between the two of them. "Are you _crazy?_" she finally spit out. "You are, aren't you?" She looked over at Luke. "She finally pushed you over the edge!"

To her surprise, Luke barked out a short laugh and then looked over at her mom, smiling. Her mom gave him a strained smile and shrugged her shoulders.

"You think this is _funny?_" Rory demanded, incensed.

"No," Luke agreed, sobering. "It's just weird how much alike the two of you can be. Weird in a good way," he hastened to assure her.

Rory shook her head. "How in the world can the two of you even think about getting married again already? Have you talked at all? Have you even tried to fix things?"

"We are trying," Lorelai said earnestly. "We've had some really good talks."

"Talks," Rory scoffed, shaking her head. She turned to Lorelai, her hands on her waist. "You're OK that he shut you out of his life? You've forgiven him for that?"

Sadness rippled over Lorelai's face and she had to squeeze her eyes shut for a moment. "I forgive him," she finally said thickly.

Rory scoffed again while she turned to Luke. "And you're OK about what she did? You're just going to overlook that little indiscretion?"

Luke looked down at the floor, his face grim as he tried to find words. "Are you OK with it?" he finally asked, turning the tables on Rory.

Taken aback, Rory swallowed, then looked sadly at her mom. "No," she admitted softly. She turned away, not wanting to see the hurt on her mother's face.

"So you don't love her anymore, then," Luke prodded her.

"Of course I love her!" Rory snapped. "Maybe she made a terrible mistake, but she's still my mom!"

Luke nodded. "It's the same way for me, Rory. I still love her. She made a terrible mistake, and she hurt me, but that hasn't made me stop loving her. I feel the same way you do."

Rory still shook her head. She turned again to Lorelai. "So that's it? You're just going to let him in again? What guarantee do you have that he's not going to just toss us aside again when something better comes along? I mean, he was supposed to care so much about us! He was always going to be there for us! And then, here comes his perfect little _real_ daughter, and suddenly we mean nothing! How can you let him do this again!" she shouted at Lorelai.

"Rory!" Lorelai gasped.

Rory gulped but turned to Luke, all of the words she'd longed to say finally spilling out. "This girl was going to be my sister, Luke! _My sister!_ And if I hadn't decided to go to Jess' at the last minute, I never would have met her at all! How do you think that makes me feel, huh? You know, I've already been dumped once by my real Dad! I never expected that from you!"

She dropped down into the chair by the door, too shaky to stand anymore. She tried but failed to keep from dissolving into tears.

Luke put up his hand, halting Lorelai's rush to her daughter. He hurried over instead, dropping to one knee beside her.

"Don't you know?" he said to her quietly, pushing back her hair, making her look at him. "I loved you first. The only reason I can be any kind of a father to April at all is because I loved you first. The only reason I can do this at all is because I had the example of you and your mom to follow." He shook his head and put his hands on her shaking shoulders. "I loved you first," he told her again, insistently. "That hasn't changed, either."

Rory nodded, but the heartbroken tears weren't ready to turn off yet. "You hurt me," she said between sniffles.

"I know," he acknowledged, as Lorelai appeared at Rory's other side with a box of tissues. "I hurt you both, and I'm so, so sorry. That's one of the things we've been talking about, and I promise you, things are going to be different. I want you both to get to know April. I don't want us to all be apart anymore."

Rory took some tissues and wiped her face. She drew in some huge, shaky breaths. "So that's good then, that you're talking." She took a minute to compose herself further. "It's good you both realize you made some huge mistakes." She sighed, thinking. "It's good you want to change." Suddenly she frowned, and looked from one to the other. "But why are you talking about getting married again already? Take some time here and get things right first."

She watched as Luke and her mother looked at each other and did that silent communication thing that she thought belonged only to her and Lorelai. Something that felt a lot like jealousy coursed through her when she saw Luke barely raise his jaw and her mother agree with him by the tiniest incline of her head.

"Rory," Lorelai said, sounding much more determined than what she felt, "I'm pregnant." She braced herself for Rory's reaction.

Rory's mouth dropped open again. A million questions rolled through her head, but somehow the one that managed to pop out was, "How?"

"Well," Lorelai couldn't help but quip nervously, "if you don't know that by now, all of the money for that fancy Yale education is being sadly wasted."

"Mom!" Rory snapped. She held her breath, praying that she wasn't going to be told that she was getting a full sibling.

Lorelai's air of assurance crumbled away. "That night, when Paul Anka died…I called Luke…and…" she looked over at him helplessly, words for once failing her.

"That's good." Rory was almost surprised to hear her own voice. She cleared her throat. "I'm glad you weren't alone," she added, not able to look at her mom.

"So, here we are," Lorelai said after a moment, with a nervous laugh.

Silence cocooned the room for a few minutes as Rory tried to absorb all of the new developments.

"How soon are you thinking about getting married?" she finally asked.

"4:30," Luke replied, looking at his watch and then crossing the room to grab his shirt.

For the third time, Rory felt her mouth drop open in shock. "4:30? You mean today? That 4:30?"

"That's the one," Lorelai confirmed, wringing her hands.

Rory looked at her mother's dress with more understanding. "Are you trying to kill Grandma?"

"No, that'd just be an added perk," Lorelai joked nervously.

"I don't get it," Rory complained. "Sure there's a baby coming, but that doesn't mean you have to jump right into this! You've got, what? Eight months? Take your time and give this some thought. There's no reason you've got to rush into it like this!"

Luke continued buttoning up his blue dress shirt while he answered Rory. "That's all my idea, I'm afraid. I'm tired of being alone." The words had poured out from him almost on their own, and his fingers fumbled with the buttons on his cuff, embarrassed to be opening himself up this way to Rory. At the same time, he realized he needed to be more forthcoming with both of the girls. He cleared his throat. "I want this family, Rory, and I want it to start now. I don't want to wait and miss more of it." He finally looked over at her and gave her a tentative smile. "I guess you and your mom have finally taught me how to be selfish."

Rory smiled back, even though she was still unconvinced. It had been a long time since she'd seen a smile on Luke's face.

He walked over and grabbed his wallet and a room key. "I've got some errands to run. I'll leave you two to get ready." He nodded at them as he left.

Lorelai and Rory both sighed and looked at each other.

"You're really OK with this?" Rory asked.

Lorelai looked away. "It's what he wants," she said lightly.

"But what about you? Is it what you want?"

Lorelai let out a laugh with a bitter note in it. "To marry Luke? Of course that's what I want. Just not like this."

"Then stop it." Rory urged. "Take your time, and think about this some more."

Lorelai rubbed her fingers along her jaw, contemplating how much to tell Rory. "Do you know what he told me? He said that if we didn't get married, he didn't want to have anything to do with the baby at all. He said either he was a full-time father, or he was out."

"No way," Rory scoffed. "You don't believe that, do you? That's not Luke!"

"Of course I don't believe it," Lorelai agreed. "But the fact that he was able to even say such a thing shows how much he really does want this. He's convinced himself that this is the way to go."

"And are you convinced?"

"I think…We've waited for years. We waited for both of us to finally look at each other at the same time and realize we'd been waiting on each other. We kept waiting for everything to be perfect. And…maybe perfect's never coming. Maybe this is as good as it gets. Maybe if we'd just gotten married when we first wanted to then when April showed up it wouldn't have made any difference. We could have avoided all of this. So maybe…leaping in does make sense."

"Marry in haste; repent in leisure," Rory quoted, her voice mocking.

"I've already had plenty of leisure to repent in," Lorelai stated sadly. "Maybe it's time to try the haste part."

"Mom," Rory tried, shaking her head.

Lorelai looked at her intently. "I do love him. You don't doubt that, do you?"

Rory swallowed hard. "No," she murmured, "I don't doubt that part."

"I just wish I didn't feel like this was so unfair to Luke," Lorelai muttered, almost to herself.

Rory watched her mom for a minute. "I'm not going to be able to talk you out of this, am I?"

"No," Lorelai confirmed. "I'm not sure I want to be talked out of it."

"OK, then I guess I'd better get dressed." Rory picked up her bag and headed towards the bathroom, but stopped suddenly halfway there, letting the bag drop back to the floor.

"Hey," she said, heading towards her mom. She gave her a big bear hug when she reached her.

"What's that for?" Lorelai asked, hugging her back happily.

"You're finally making me a big sister," Rory said. "How does that part feel to you?"

"I'm pretty excited," Lorelai said with a genuine smile. "I've wished for this for a long time. It's just not really the way I wanted it to happen, but yeah, the baby part's pretty cool. You're going to babysit, right?"

"As much as I can. Maybe the baby can just come and live with me at Yale, huh?"

Lorelai laughed affectionately at that. "Yeah, I'm sure Paris would be in favor of that! Just think, though, by the time the baby gets here, you'll be almost ready to graduate."

"No empty nest for you," Rory told her.

"No empty nest," Lorelai agreed.

Rory scrutinized her closely. "How are you feeling?"

"I've had some morning sickness," Lorelai admitted. "It wasn't the flu, after all." She suddenly paused to reflect. "You know, since I've been here, I don't think I've been sick at all."

"Must be the ducks," Rory observed astutely, pointing to the carved one sitting on the ledge, once again heading off to get dressed.

"Yeah," Lorelai agreed absently, knowing instinctively that it probably had more to do with someone else who was sharing the room.

* * *

Luke knocked on the door when he returned. Lorelai opened it, frowning in confusion when she saw it was him.

"Didn't want to just barge in," he explained to her. Softer, he asked, "How is she with this? OK?"

"I think so, yeah," Lorelai murmured, giving him a smile of relief.

Luke moved into the room, carrying what looked to be two flat pizza boxes. Lorelai was instantly fascinated and followed him closely, trying to sniff at the boxes.

"Not pizza," she said, puzzled.

"Nope," Luke grinned. He handed one box to her, just as Rory stepped out of the bathroom.

"Did you plan this?" he asked in disbelief, taking in Rory's deep blue sleeveless dress.

Lorelai laughed, delighted. "I think this is just one of those spontaneous serendipitous Gilmore girl things that happen sometime."

Rory laughed, too, holding the skirt of her dress out as she curtsied to them. Then she noticed the boxes. "Pizza?" she asked hopefully.

"Not pizza," Luke told her, "but this one's for you."

Lorelai flung open the top of her box, then stopped, frozen in place. "Oh, Luke," she finally said, her voice wobbly with the memory evoked.

"I know you said you didn't need flowers to carry," he explained gruffly. "But I thought you needed something. And I'll never forget how pretty you looked the day Liz got married."

Lorelai gently touched the wreath of flowers lying inside the box. This time it was made up entirely of white roses and she could see long white ribbons attached to the back of it. She shook her head, trying to get in control of her emotions. "So sweet," she choked out, giving him a tender smile.

Rory pulled hers out, made up of pink roses and bachelor buttons, with deep pink ribbons trailing down the back. She rushed to the mirror, anxious to try it on. As she admired herself in the mirror, she saw her mother carefully settle her wreath onto her own dark curls. She watched as Luke took a step closer, helping Lorelai in placing it evenly on her head. She watched as he let his fingers touch her mom's face and absently play with one of her curls while the two of them shared a long, deep look.

She turned towards them, clearing her throat, making them break up the semi-intimate moment they were enjoying.

"Something occurred to me while I was getting ready," she told them, breathing a little easier now that she'd seen with her own eyes that their feelings for one another were still present. "I realized that I'm the one person who can actually empathize with both of you."

She nodded towards Luke. "I don't know if you know this or not, Luke, but Logan cheated on me. A lot." She watched as Luke's face stiffened and his jaw clenched, and she knew on some psychic level that not only did he know, he'd had to be restrained from decking Logan over it. She smiled, secretly pleased at that. "He had his reasons and his excuses, but that didn't make it hurt any less. But I can tell you that if you really want to get past it, you can. So there is hope."

She looked at her mom, who looked ashamed. "And Mom, I know what it feels like to be cut out of someone's life. I should have always been a part of Dad's life, but I wasn't. His parents should have been my grandparents, but they weren't interested. I know it's not my fault, and I don't think I even actually care anymore, but I still know how much that hurts, to not be wanted by someone who should care about you. So I kind of know how you felt too."

She sighed and looked between both of them. "I'm still not absolutely convinced that you're doing the right thing here, but I wanted to let you know that I'm not opposed to it, either. I think…I think that one way or another, you're supposed to be together. And I…I love you both." Her throat had closed up alarmingly by the end of her words, nearly pinching them off.

Lorelai clutched at Luke's arm as she motioned frantically at Rory with her other hand. "Oh, Kid, c'mere!"

Rory rushed over to them. "Group hug?" she asked, right before she threw her arms around them both.

"Group hug," Lorelai confirmed, happily, forgetting her reserve with Luke as her arm went around him as well.

Luke drew both of them to his chest, enjoying a brief, satisfied moment of pure contentment. Then, just the tiniest flicker of guilt poked through his chest because April wasn't here, sharing this too. He resolved to make it up to her, somehow, and decided that for the time being, two out of three wasn't bad. He breathed in their complimentary scents of vanilla and cherry, and gave each of them one last squeeze.

"Time," he reminded them, pulling back.

They rushed about, putting themselves together. Luke put on his tie and pushed his arms into his suit jacket while the girls looked in the mirror one last time.

Lorelai caught his reflection and turned around, disappointed. "Oh, I should have thought about getting you a boutonniere."

"Yeah, because I hate to show my face without a flower in my lapel," Luke said dryly.

"Wait," Rory said, and whipped the flowers off her head. She turned it to the back and carefully pulled out one rose and one bachelor button where no one would notice. She twisted them together with a single green leaf lying in the box, and cautiously poked it through Luke's button hole. Lorelai fastened it with a bobby pin found in the dresser drawer.

"Perfect," both girls decreed.

"Do you have pockets?" Luke asked Rory, while she looked in the mirror, once again putting on her flowers.

"No," she laughed, patting her skirt. "Why?"

"I was going to give you the rings." He opened his hands, showing the black velvet boxes. "You're kind of the maid of honor and best man all rolled up into one here. I figure that made you in charge of the rings." He started to pocket them.

Rory frowned, concentrating. "Why don't I just wear them?" she asked, reaching for the boxes. She slipped Luke's larger band on first, then put Lorelai's on top to anchor it. She shook her hand, showing that they were secure. "Are we set then?"

Luke's eyes met Lorelai's, and they both looked away, nervously.

"R-Ready," Lorelai stuttered.

"Let's go," Luke said, trying to sound confident. To his surprise, he realized his confidence wasn't an act. "Let's go get married."

* * *

Luke led them down the hall to the Clerk of the Courts office, swinging open the door so that the girls could enter first.

The young blonde woman sitting at the reception desk looked up from the sheaf of papers by her computer screen, a harried expression on her face. A pleased smile soon chased the sour look from her face when she took in their wedding clothes. "You must be the 4:30," she observed, glancing at her appointment book. "Gilmore/Danes?"

"That's us," Lorelai piped up, her nerves unleashing all of her pent-up words. "We're the Gilmore part," she waved at herself and Rory, "and he's the Danes." She pointed at Luke. "So yeah, together we're Gilmores and Danes. Gilmore-Danes," she repeated, suddenly putting a hyphen in it. "Lorelai Gilmore-Danes," she muttered, more-or-less to herself. She smiled. That sounded pretty good.

The receptionist scurried to the doorway of a small office behind her. "Sondra, the 4:30's here."

"Send 'em in!"

As they entered her office, the small, assured woman stood to greet them, her chin-length gray hair swinging forward as she extended her hand. "I'm Sondra Kennedy. I'll be performing your ceremony today."

"Lorelai Gilmore," Lorelai said, rushing to take the woman's hand. "And this is Luke, Luke Danes," she added, as Luke took her hand, "and this is our daughter, Rory."

Both Luke and Rory's heads jerked at that, and they shared a look. Lorelai didn't seem to even register what she'd just said.

"Nice to meet you folks," Sondra said. "Well, as with most things in life, we've got some paperwork to complete here. If you'll follow Christy back out to her desk, she'll help you get through it." She looked again at the three of them and appeared to be pondering something. She motioned for them all to go back out into the front room.

While Luke and Lorelai started filling in the necessary documents, Sondra spoke again. "It's such a lovely day, and you all look so pretty, and after all, it is almost the end of the workweek. How would you feel about going across the street to Lighthouse Park and getting married out there? It will be out in public, but it's a beautiful spot. The flowers are exceptionally gorgeous this year. How does that sound to you?"

"That sounds really nice," Lorelai said wistfully. "Luke?"

"Whatever you want," Luke smiled at her.

"An outdoor wedding would be perfect! Thanks for being willing to do it," Lorelai told her.

Sondra chuckled. "No, you're doing me a favor, getting me out of this dark office on such a nice day!"

"OK," Christy, said, briskly, looking over the papers, "your daughter, here, is one witness. Do you have anyone else coming?"

"No, we're it," Lorelai said.

"Well, Christy, then it looks like you get out of the office early, too," her boss winked at her.

"I can't," Christy said regretfully. "I've still got this report to finish by 5. But you all head on over. Don't worry, I'll rustle up someone to be a witness for you, and send them over there as soon as I can."

They followed Sondra across the street, to the lush, green park built around the lighthouse point. Rory stepped up beside her, asking about its historical significance.

Luke had automatically put his arm around Lorelai's waist when they stepped off the curb, crossing the street. She leaned against his side, an automatic response on her part, as well. They stayed that way, even after reaching the park.

"Luke," Lorelai said quietly, suddenly stopping and turning to him. She smiled at him, hoping that her eyes were conveying how seriously she meant what she was going to say. She leaned over, whispering into his ear. "Barrel of monkeys," she said, grinning at the ridiculous words.

The lines creased around the corners of his eyes as her words made him smile. His head dipped down quickly as he laughed. He leaned over to her ear. "Your battleship sunk me," he replied. Then, because he really couldn't help it, he kissed her softly, right at her temple. His fingers lightly traced the ribbon streaming out from her wreath of flowers.

They beamed at each other because suddenly all of those intervening years had vanished. Once again they were those same giddy people they'd been on that other wedding day, just starting to explore their relationship. Luke took her hand and they walked around to the other side of the lighthouse.

"I think this is a lovely spot," Sondra told them, gesturing.

It was. They were on the seaside part, so the water on the bay was sparkling back up at them. Deep purple petunias, dark salvia and bright pink impatiens lined every walkway. Huge pots of trailing purple and white petunias sat all around the lighthouse. Sondra led them over to an archway that graced a small path leading down towards the docks. A bright pink flowering vine cascaded over it.

"I thought we could have the ceremony right here," she offered. "We won't be too long, so I don't think we'll inconvenience too many people."

"It's beautiful," Lorelai agreed.

Sondra caught sight of someone. "Over here!" she shouted, waving her arms.

"Oh great," Luke muttered, under his breath. Lorelai bit at her lips, trying to contain her giggles.

"What?" Rory asked, looking back and forth between her mom and Luke, and the man in the police uniform whom Sondra was greeting.

"It's Luke's new best friend," Lorelai told Rory. "I'll explain more later," she whispered to the girl, grinning madly.

"Russ, this is―" Sondra started to say.

"We've met," Russ said mildly, cutting her off. His eyes sized up Luke again.

Lorelai jumped into the breach. "You haven't met our daughter, though. Chief Carlisle, this is Rory."

Luke and Rory looked at each other again. Once might have been a goof. Twice was deliberate.

"Nice to meet you," the Chief of Police said as the girl with the same dazzling smile as her mother gave him her hand.

"You too," Rory said politely. "I hope these two haven't been giving you a lot of problems." She'd picked up on the atmosphere.

"Nothing we can't handle," he assured her.

"Well, let's get started," Sondra said briskly. "I can give you the state-sanctioned cut-and-dried version, or I can give you something of my own, that does the job but it's a little bit more traditional. Which would you prefer?"

"I―I haven't done a lot of traditional in my life," Lorelai said hesitantly, "but I think I'd like it if this was."

"Traditional it is," Sondra said.

She posed them so that Luke and Lorelai were holding hands under the archway, the sea in front of them. Russ stood by Luke's side; Rory by Lorelai's.

"Everyone who comes before me to get married has a story to tell," Sondra began. "There's always some reason why people choose to come here and get married. Sometimes they're very romantic stories. Sometimes people just can't wait. Sometimes they're running away from problems at home, or from families that just don't understand. Sometimes, frankly, they just don't care. One place is just as good as another. I hesitate to marry the ones like that. I want you to understand that this ceremony is just as binding as if you were standing in a cathedral, with hundreds of people watching you. The two of you are going to promise to live your lives together here today. If you are not ready to do that, if you have any doubts whatsoever, this is your opportunity to step away."

Sondra paused for a beat, waiting.

"Lorelai." Sondra turned smoothly to her. "Do you come here today in front of these witnesses willingly, to commit yourself to being a wife to Luke? Are you willing to share your life with him, to create a home with him, to be with him for the rest of your days? If so, please answer, 'I will.'"

Lorelai gave a little gasp, as though she really hadn't expected to get right into it this way. "I will," she replied, a little breathlessly, squeezing Luke's hand for all she was worth.

"Luke, I ask the same thing of you," Sondra continued. "Do you come here today willingly, to commit yourself to being a husband to Lorelai? Are you willing to share your life with her, to create a home with her, to be with her for the rest of your days?"

"I will," Luke said firmly.

Sondra then slowly spoke the words Lorelai needed to repeat.

"I, Lorelai Victoria Gilmore, take you, Lucas William Danes, to be my beloved husband, to have and to hold you, to honor you, to treasure you, to be at your side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times, and in the bad, and to love and cherish you always. I promise you this from my heart, for all the days of my life."

Lorelai did indeed speak those words from her heart, letting her eyes tell him how much she meant them. She could feel tears threatening by the end, but she blinked them back defiantly.

"I, Lucas William Danes, take you, Lorelai Victoria Gilmore, to be my beloved wife," Luke spoke the words gruffly, the emotion he was feeling nearly overwhelming him. "To have and to hold you, to honor you, to treasure you, to be at your side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times, and in the bad, and to love and cherish you always. I promise you this from my heart, for all the days of my life."

"Do you have rings?" Sondra asked.

"Yes, here," Rory said, taking them from her finger eagerly.

"Lorelai, as you put this ring on Luke's finger, please repeat these words," Sondra instructed her.

"I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you," Lorelai repeated, pushing the silver band over Luke's knuckle. "Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side and that I will always be―" She choked up for just a moment, regained control, and continued. "I will always be a faithful partner to you."

Luke reached out, put his hand under her chin and gently raised her face so that she was once again looking directly into his. He nodded at her, silently letting her know that he believed her.

Then it was his turn to slide the narrow silver ring onto her finger. When he repeated the words "I am always by your side" he increased the pressure on her hand, signaling to her that he was never leaving her again.

Lorelai looked at the silver band, mesmerized, as it shone in the summer sun. She couldn't believe this was the same band she thought was so dull back in the jewelry store. It was the most beautiful ring she'd ever seen. She curled her fingers, locking it onto her hand.

Before Sondra could say anything else, Luke spoke up. "Is it OK…I mean, are we allowed to say anything on our own?"

Sondra smiled at him. "Certainly. Feel free, if you'd like to add something of your own."

Luke blew out a breath, decidedly uncomfortable, and took both of Lorelai's hands in his as he turned back to her.

"We've been friends for a long time now," he reminded her. "You've been a huge part of my life for a really long time. We were always brutally honest with each other. And somewhere along the line…I forgot the friendship part. I forgot the honest part. But I'm promising you, Lorelai, I won't forget it again. I'm promising you that when I say that I'm sharing my life with you, I mean it. I love you, and Rory, and April, and I promise you that we're all going to have a life together."

Lorelai was absorbing those amazing words from her normally-quiet diner guy when she realized that everyone was looking at her, waiting on her say something back. She gulped, and hoped that her never-ending fountain of words would not fail her now.

"I love you so much, Luke," she started. "You know you share that top space in my heart. I love you because of the way you've always taken care of Rory. I love you because you want to be a father to April. I love you because you tried, so hard, with Jess. I love you because you'd fix everything, for everyone, if you could. And I love you, so, so much, because you're willing to give me a second chance. I want us to all have our life together, too, and I promise you that I'm going to be right there beside you, until we're old and gray and sitting on the front porch in our matching jogging suits and you're totally sick of me."

There were a couple of chuckles and Luke smiled at her fondly.

"Never gonna happen," he said.

"The matching jogging suits?" she asked, arching her eyebrows.

"Getting sick of you," he insisted.

Sondra cleared her throat. "Marriage can stand for love, loyalty, honesty, or trust, but most of the time everyone forgets that it starts with friendship. Before you two knew love, you were friends. And that friendship turned into the path that led you to today. Don't ever make the mistake of thinking that you can direct the course of love. Because love, if it's the real thing, it directs you."

"And now," she said, smiling broadly, "it gives me great pleasure, with the authority from the state of Maryland, to pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride," she winked at Luke.

Lorelai felt her insides quiver as something cold clutched at her in fear, but before it could take hold at all, Luke had her in his arms. His lips sought hers out eagerly, and she locked away any of the fears and insecurities still haunting her and she kissed him back, letting all of the love she'd ever felt for this man flow out onto him, praying that he could feel how happy she was.

"I love you," he whispered into her ear, the emotion making his voice raw.

"So much," she agreed, blinking hard, and smiling her dazzling smile at him and to the others, as well, suddenly realizing that they weren't alone.

Almost at the same time they opened their arms to Rory, and she eagerly stepped between them, hugging them both, laughing so that she didn't cry.

"That was pretty impressive," she said, trying not to let her lips tremble. She felt a tear slide down her cheek anyway, and she laughed at herself as she chased it away.

"Congratulations, folks," Russ offered, stepping up and putting out his hand for Luke to shake. "I wish you all the best." He gave Lorelai a sedate kiss on the cheek and smiled at Rory, preparing to leave.

"Oh, wait! Pictures!" Lorelai cried, diving for the camera stashed in Luke's pocket.

The girls insisted on getting every possible combination of pictures of them all, Lorelai taking especial delight in posing Luke and Russ together. Luke already knew one of his favorites was going to be of the girls together, their heads touching, the ribbons from their wreaths tangled together in the summer breeze, both of them smiling at him.

Finally Russ ambled away, and Sondra prepared to take her leave as well. "Best wishes to you," she said sincerely. "I don't know what story led you here, but I have a feeling that you're one of the couples that's going to make it. Drop me a line on your anniversary and let me know, OK?"

Once she'd left, and it was just the three of them, Rory looked at them expectantly. "Well, what's next?" she demanded, pretending to be bored.

Lorelai shrugged her shoulders as though it was obvious. "There's only one thing to top this," she insisted, rolling her eyes. "Duck Museum!"

"Are you kidding me?" Luke demanded, but he really wasn't surprised to find himself strolling through the Decoy Museum a short while later with his new wife and stepdaughter, all of them still dressed in their wedding finery. He shook his head, trying not to laugh at their ridiculous conversations with the decoys on display. He also wasn't surprised when he ended up carrying all of the decoys and duck-printed paraphernalia purchased in the gift shop for all of their family and friends.

They went back to the hotel to drop off the ducks and freshen up, and then strolled along the boardwalk until it was time for their reservations at Larry's recommended restaurant.

They ate, and laughed, and the girls ate some more. They reminisced about when Rory was little. Luke told them some stories from when he was a boy. They remembered the first time they'd been in the diner. Luke recalled the first time Lorelai had lured him over to fix something in the house. Lorelai stared at her ring, convinced it was absolutely the prettiest thing she'd ever seen.

The girls gasped in surprise as a small wedding cake was brought over to their table. They didn't miss the smug look on Luke's face.

"You!" Lorelai said, smacking his shoulder lightly, completely delighted.

He shrugged, modestly. "Someone had to think of these things."

Playfully, Lorelai put Luke's hand on top of hers as she cut up the cake.

Rory found the camera. "Go on," she urged, bringing it up to her eye, "do that cutesy feeding each other cake thing. Come on, Luke. Say 'I hate cake,'" she prodded him.

"I hate cake," he said obediently, with a huge smile. He willingly took the bite Lorelai brought to his mouth.

Lorelai fought down the nearly-overwhelming desire she had to kiss off the small lick of icing clinging to his lower lip, because, well, Rory was right there, and she still wasn't sure if he would want her to. The sudden memory of his kiss after the ceremony made her shiver, just as he raised a cake-laden fork to her mouth.

"Good," she said, through a full mouth, her eyes shining back at him in a way that made him suddenly very interested in his water glass.

The first notes of music broke over them, and they all turned to the far corner of the room, where a 3-piece band had set up next to a small dance floor. They'd all been so interested in their own conversation that they hadn't noticed.

The band went through several songs and finally a few couples got up to dance.

Several minutes later Rory stopped in the middle of her story, cocking her head as the band began another song. She grinned madly at them. "Go on!" she insisted. "It might not ever get better than this! Go have your wedding dance!"

"Oh, I don't know," Lorelai began doubtfully.

Luke stood up and reached for her hand. "Come on, Mrs. Danes. Let's dance."

Joy shot all the way to her toes when he called her that. She eagerly took his hand and they made their way to the tiny dance area.

"So, what's the song?" he asked, not recognizing it. He pulled her tighter against him, until it felt right.

She waited until the band reached the refrain, then she put her mouth up close to his ear and sang, very softly, just for him.

"And I-I-I-I…will always… love you."

She felt him chuckle against her as he squeezed her just a little bit tighter. "Rory's right," he confirmed, "that's pretty much perfect."

They danced through all of that song and the next one as well, even though neither of them was sure what it was. It wasn't about the song, by then. It was about how good it felt to be close to each other. But finally, with abashed, guilty smiles, they made their way back to the table where Rory was waiting for them.

"You guys are just _so_ adorable," Rory pretended to gush at them, as Lorelai took her seat. But the happy look on her face let them in on the secret that she really thought they were.

Luke held his hand out to Rory. "Isn't there supposed to be a father-daughter dance, too?"

Rory's tongue probed the side of her cheek as she stared at his hand. "I think―I think that's supposed to be when I get married."

Luke shrugged. "Well, like your mom says, we're not exactly traditionalists here."

Rory grinned and took his hand, eagerly following him to the dance floor, shooting her mom a pleased glance as they took their places.

Lorelai picked up the camera and took several shots of her husband and her daughter moving slowly around the dance floor, but she wasn't sure how good any of them were because she could barely focus through the happy tears swimming in her eyes.

* * *

"Stay," Lorelai insisted, holding Rory tightly as they stood by her car.

"Stay," Luke echoed, letting the hood of her car slam closed from checking all of the fluid levels. "It's getting late. You don't need to be driving back tonight."

"Yeah, I do," Rory refuted. "I need to work Alyssa's shift tomorrow, since she covered for me this afternoon. And…you two are all right. You should have this time together, without a pesky daughter poking her nose in it."

"You're welcome to stay," Lorelai tried once more.

"I'll be home soon," Rory assured her, with one last hug. "I love you both," she said, getting into her car. "You're going to be OK."

Luke and Lorelai stepped a little closer to each other. Lorelai crossed her arms over her chest. Saying goodbye to Rory never got any easier.

"Take good care of my little brother or sister," Rory teased, and then backed out of the parking spot, waving as she drove away.

Both of them watched her drive out into traffic, while silence and uncertainty washed over them once again.

The silence followed them back to their room, where fatigue made an appearance as well.

Lorelai carefully removed her wreath and hung it over a post on the dresser, softly running her finger down over the long ribbon.

"I think I'm going to get ready for bed," she mentioned, sitting down and loosening the straps around her ankles.

"Go ahead." His eyes met hers from where he stood in front of the mirror. "Big day, huh?"

"The biggest," she smiled, grabbing her bag and heading into the bathroom.

Once the door closed behind her, Luke stood motionless for some minutes in front of the mirror, staring at his reflection. Finally he sighed, shifting his weight, and the overhead light glinted off of his wedding band, shocking him. It already felt completely normal to be wearing it. It already felt like it had always been a part of him. He looked up and stared into his own eyes again.

Inside the safety of the bathroom, Lorelai stuck her hand in her bag and slowly drew out a long, black, lacy nightgown she'd brought along. She didn't know why she'd grabbed it on that morning when she was frantically packing and had tucked it into the bottom of the bag. Was she honestly thinking that she could somehow seduce him back into wanting to be with her? She shook her head at her reflection, stuffing the lacy garment back into the bag. With a sigh she once again reached for the blue pajamas she'd worn every other night.

When she went back into the bedroom she was surprised to see that Luke was still standing in practically the same position as when she left the room. The only thing different was that he was now wearing light-cotton drawstring pajama bottoms.

And…nothing else.

Her breath caught somewhere in her chest, smacking against the lust that was traveling upwards. She had been planning on giving him a friendly hug, to thank him for the day. No way could she do that now. She slowly walked over to him, anyway.

She touched his arm lightly, and smiled at him in the mirror, hoping he couldn't hear how her heart was pounding. "Thank you, Luke, for planning all of this today. I don't think we could have had a nicer wedding day, no matter how long we would have had to plan it out. Remind me to have you help out at the Dragonfly, the next time we have a really difficult bride to pacify." She squeezed his arm just a little tighter, before she let it go. "You made all my dreams come true today, Mr. Danes." She smiled at him again, trying hard to keep that flirty, teasing note in her voice. "Goodnight," she almost whispered, and turned to go over to her bed.

His hand shot out and grabbed her arm, right above her elbow. He carefully turned her around, while turning himself to face her.

His hand rubbed her arm where he was touching her. He carefully kept his eyes on that spot on her arm, too nervous to let her see his eyes and the desire that was lurking there.

"You know, Mrs. Danes, it is our wedding night," he said, as casually as he could.

She felt like she might not be ever able to breathe again. "Yes, it is," she agreed faintly.

He nodded, as both of his hands now started rubbing up and down her arms. "Society pretty much expects us to sleep together tonight," he observed.

The air all rushed out of her at that, making her dizzy. "Well, we certainly wouldn't want to disappoint society." She had no idea how she was able to get words out at all.

He looked straight into her eyes then, drinking her in, letting her see what he really felt. "Lorelai," he said, very softly, leaning his forehead down against hers, "I would really like to make love to you tonight."

She clutched at him, very afraid that she'd end up in a heap on the floor if he didn't hold her up. "I'd like that too," she managed to gasp out.

He was suddenly much closer to her, with his hands running under her hair, and over her neck and shoulders, down her arms. "Is that…I mean, with the baby…are you sure you feel like it?"

"I feel like it," she assured him, pulling him even closer. "I really feel like it."

Not able to resist any longer, he bent his head to kiss her. He let all of the huge emotions he'd been feeling all day melt into her with the kiss; all of the love he wanted to give her along with all of the hopes he had for their future.

When he pulled back she tried to get her bearings, pushing gently against his chest, staring at the dark hair scattered there. She sucked in a gulp of air, trying to calm her racing heart.

"I'm…I'm really OK," she tried to assure him once again. She gave a vague wave towards her chest. "These are just a little sore. Hormones, you know," she said, with a breathless little chuckle.

He nodded soberly. He opened his hand, and then slowly slid his flattened palm down her front, his breath hitching as her nipples sprang to attention under his touch.

Electric desire washed through her, completely filling up every cell. Breathing once again became a lost art.

"I can be gentle," he whispered to her, swallowing hard.

She could only nod as he carefully picked her up and carried her to his bed.

Her last coherent thought was that she should have put on the lacy black nightgown after all.

* * *

**Postscript:** I used ideas from the following websites to formulate Luke and Lorelai's wedding vows and some of Sondra's dialogue: _about,_ _1weddingsource_, and _myweddingvows_.

When I was reading this over again and cleaning it up a little bit, I realized that this is the only wedding scene I've ever written for them. I've had them married a lot by the epilogues of my stories, but this is the only time we got to see their wedding. Maybe I'll have to do that again some time!


	7. Homecoming

**Notes:** It had been so long since I'd written this story that I honestly didn't remember this chapter at all. When I recently read it again, it was like reading something for the first time. Normally I am the last person to ever praise their own work, but I have to admit, I _love_ this chapter! In fact, I think it's become the second favorite chapter I've ever written, next to "The Substitute" from "Just the Perfect Friendship." Hope you read and enjoy it as well!

* * *

A small sleepy snort from the passenger seat made Luke glance over at his wife, who was once again taking the opportunity to nap while he drove the Jeep home. A smile made up of a certain percentage of satisfied smugness tugged at his lips while one of his hands immediately tried to creep over to stroke her alluring leg. He snatched it back and anchored it firmly onto the steering wheel, exhaling forcefully.

Lorelai deserved to catch up on some sleep. Their wedding night had been the joyful start of what had turned out to be a real honeymoon. They had even stayed an extra day, so anxious were they to prolong that delicious feeling of belonging to each other again. And even this morning…Luke's smile turned into a full-on grin. They'd barely made it out the door by checkout time. Yes, Lorelai deserved a nap.

However, as Luke swiveled his head at an unfamiliar intersection, he wished she'd wake up. He'd driven into town from an unaccustomed route and he was momentarily confused about where they were. He wished she was awake to look at the landmarks and tell him where to turn next.

But on the other hand…That wouldn't be good, if she _did_ wake up and divine his plan. Determined to do this on his own, he turned right and drove several blocks until a street name jogged his memory. With relief he turned left and soon found the neighborhood he'd been seeking.

He pulled over to the side of the tree-lined street. He looked over at Lorelai and this time, he did rub his hand over her leg.

"Lorelai," he said gently. "Hey, sleepyhead. Wake up." He hoped the anxiety bubbling in his stomach wasn't obvious in his words.

She stretched and smiled, her eyes still tightly closed. She straightened and leaned over to him, unerringly finding his mouth. Her lips clung to his in the most familiar way and when the kiss ended she spent some long, indulgent moments just rubbing her cheek against his. Finally she sighed and opened her eyes, lazily looking over his shoulder at the scenery visible from the driver's side window.

He heard her gasp in recognition. She pushed away from him abruptly, landing forcefully back in her own seat as her head snapped around to look at the other side of the street.

"Luke!" she hissed shrilly. "This is Hartford! What the hell are we doing in Hartford?"

He ran his fingers over the cover on the steering wheel. "We're going to tell your parents we got married." He hoped he sounded authoritative.

"We will do no such thing," she fumed.

He nodded, looking straight out of the windshield, taking in all of the painstakingly manicured front lawns ahead of them down the street. "Yeah, we are," he stated quietly, but with certainty.

Apparently she heard the note of conviction in his voice and tried a different tack. "Look, of course we'll tell them. Eventually. Just not now. Let's just enjoy this by ourselves for a while first," she pleaded.

He shook his head, not looking at her, knowing he wouldn't be able to resist the pleading in her eyes. "That's what you always do, Lorelai. How's that been working for you?"

"Suddenly you're Dr. Phil?" she demanded.

"Well, right now I've still got more hair than he does." Luke ruefully rubbed a hand over his head. "But I've watched you do this dance with your folks for years, where you keep something from them and then it all blows up in your face when they find out. And I don't want to be a part of that anymore. I'm a middle-aged guy, Lorelai, and you're…" He grinned when he saw her already taking offense at what she thought he was going to say, and toned it down. "You're an adult. You're no kid. Hell, your kid isn't even a kid. We're too old to be trying to sneak something past your parents. It's ridiculous! If they don't like what we have to say, fine, that's their business. They can choose whether or not they want to be around us. But I'm not going to deliberately keep something this important from them."

Lorelai's mouth opened and closed several times while he watched her try to find some way to refute him. Her eyes darted all around, trying to find an argument to persuade him. Finally she smacked the dashboard in front of her in frustration.

"Fine," she said petulantly. "We will throw ourselves to the lions. We will put aside any effort at self-preservation and we will march in there and tell them we're married. Just don't expect any heroics from me. I'm not taking a bullet for you. This is all on you."

"Yes, it is," Luke agreed soberly.

"OK, then." Lorelai gulped in a nervous breath. "Just…This is just about the getting married part, right? Please don't make me tell them about the baby yet. I really…I really don't want them to know that I screwed up again."

Luke bit his lip as he reached for her hand. He hated that she thought anything about the baby was a mistake, although the way it had been conceived still made pangs of regret shoot through him. He squeezed her hand until she looked at him, trying to blink away the anxiety in them.

"I think that the baby news can wait," he agreed. His thumb rubbed over the smooth silver band on her finger. "I just want to keep them informed," he added in his dry tone. "I'm not trying to kill them."

Lorelai's big breath of relief rushed out of her. "Good," she said, leaning back in her seat. "Well, let's get this over with, then."

Luke pulled the Jeep around the block and started to turn into the Gilmore's driveway.

"Wait, wait!" Lorelai said urgently. She rubbed at her stomach and gave him a big-eyed look of distress. "I don't think I feel good, Luke."

"Don't do that, Lorelai," he muttered, parking the car.

"Luke," she whined.

He swallowed hard before he turned to face her. "You can't fool me, Lorelai. I know exactly what you look like when you're sick. And I remember far too well that night you came to the diner to tell me about the baby. I'll never get how you looked that night out of my head. I don't ever want to see you look like that again. Do you understand? Pretending to be sick is something you can't ever do to me. Promise me that."

He watched as her face lost the pouty look and her eyes widened as his words made an impact on her. "I didn't mean…I'm sorry, Luke. I won't do that again." Her tone was sincere as she met his eyes, and he nodded.

He pulled the keys out of the ignition. "So. Are we ready?"

"Let the games begin," Lorelai said gloomily, reaching for the door handle.

At the massive front door they paused to prepare themselves. Luke felt a chill swirl down his back in spite of the heat from the July day. Nothing good had ever happened to him in this house and he dreaded what lay in store for him this day. He had a sudden insight into how hard it must be for Lorelai to face this over and over again. He put his arm around her waist, giving her a squeeze to remind her that she was no longer facing this alone. She gave him a slight smile and a sigh, pushed the doorbell, and squared up her shoulders in a way he'd seen her do countless times.

That week's maid answered the door.

"Hi. Are Mr. and Mrs. Gilmore here?" Lorelai asked. "I'm their daughter."

The maid nodded silently and ushered them into the sitting room before turning to go find her employers.

"Wait!" Lorelai called, taking a step towards the maid before she disappeared. "Tell them that Mr. and Mrs. Danes are here to see them, OK?"

"Lorelai!" Luke barked at her.

"No, this is better," she insisted grimly. "Let's give them a chance to have some warning."

Soon they could hear a door slam somewhere in the house. Voices were raised. Another door slammed. They instinctively took a step closer to each other.

Emily Gilmore stalked into the room, a thunderous glare pasted onto her face. She was carrying gardening gloves and as she entered the room she tore off a wide-brimmed hat she'd been wearing, and tossed both it and her gloves towards an upholstered chair. When they missed the chair and she didn't react, it proved just how upset she was.

Richard was on her heels, a stunned look haunting his face. He had a newspaper jammed under his arm, while his fingers were trying to retie the bowtie hanging under his collar.

Emily's eyes swept ferociously over them. "Lorelai, I hope to God this is one of those jokes you always think are so funny. I always had faith in your intelligence, if nothing else. I sincerely hope that you didn't allow this man to worm his way into your life again!"

Luke felt his nostrils flare and he had to press his lips together to keep from laying into this woman who was now his mother-in-law. He felt Lorelai tense beside him. Then she threw back her head and flung up her hand so that her ring was clearly visible.

Emily actually gasped. Her shoulders sagged, briefly. "What were you _thinking_?" she shouted, getting her second wind.

Richard caught Luke's eye. He nodded a cordial greeting. Luke looked at him in disbelief.

"I was thinking I wanted to be married to Luke!" Lorelai shouted back at her mother, fuming.

"After the way this man treated you? The callous way he cast you aside? After the way he showed he cared nothing about your feelings, you decided to go back for more?"

"Now, just a minute―" Luke heatedly tried to interject.

"We had some bad times, yes," Lorelai jumped in. "But that doesn't erase all of the good memories. It doesn't do away with how much we care about each other!"

"Bad times?" Emily sniffed. She zeroed in on Luke. "Is that what it was, Luke? It was just a bad night that forced your fiancée to go to Boston?"

Luke's mouth dropped open as his heated anger turned to cold fury.

"Mother!" Lorelai stepped closer to Emily, her fists clenched. "We know we both made mistakes. We are trying to fix them." Her controlled voice was showing how hard she was attempting to keep herself in check.

Richard suddenly appeared at Luke's shoulder. "Luke, what do you say we have a drink?" he asked amiably.

Luke's head whipped over to stare at the older man. "What?" he asked, incredulous.

"You call what happened a mistake?" Emily flung out the words to Lorelai. "Oh, it was just a mistake," she repeated, making her voice high-pitched and sugary. "It was just a mistake that I forgot for two months to tell you I have a daughter. It was just a mistake that I ended up in another man's bed!"

"Let's go have a drink," Richard urged again.

"Yes! Those were mistakes! Mistakes that we are trying to put behind us! Mistakes that we are going to recover from, because we love each other!" Lorelai shouted.

"But…" Luke pointed helplessly to the two furious women.

Richard shook his head, smiling slightly as he stepped over to the drink table. "That doesn't really concern us anymore."

Luke looked with apprehension at Richard, who was calmly pouring them glasses of Scotch, to the two women shouting at each other, their arms flailing in synchronization. He wondered if Richard had lost touch with reality. "How does that not concern us?" he asked, agitated.

An insightful smile made Richard's lips curl up. "Scotch OK with you?"

"Sure," Luke said in resignation, still keeping watch over the fight going on across the room. He reached to take the glass, giving his attention to Richard.

The older man leaned towards him slightly. "Emily has been so worried about Lorelai," he confided. "Both of us were concerned that this break with you was going to permanently scar her. She just hasn't been herself for a very long time now. It's good to hear some fight back in her voice."

"This is good?" Luke asked dubiously.

"Oh, yes, this is good." Richard paused to savor a mouthful of the smooth Scotch. "I'll tell you a secret," he offered. "I know Emily very, very well. I watched her shoulders sag in relief when she saw that you two were really married. She knows that's what Lorelai has desired more than anything."

"But she's trying to rip her to shreds!" Luke was still fighting the desire to go over and rescue Lorelai, to drag her away from her mother's shrill words.

Richard shook his head again, thoughtfully. "This is what they do, Luke. I know it's not pretty. But you have two very strong-minded women here, both who think they know best and both who refuse to back down in a fight. They'll get past this. It'll be all right. Trust me."

Luke's head swiveled between Richard's calm assurance and the turmoil being flung across the room. He took a gulp of his drink, not knowing what else to do.

"Tell me Luke," Richard said, the amiable note still in his voice, "why _did_ you decide to marry Lorelai?"

That brought his focus solely onto Richard. As he tried to formulate a response, he recognized how firmly Richard was clutching his glass. He became aware of the set of the man's jaw. It came to him that Richard was not asking him this just to make conversation.

"I didn't have a choice," he said, and he watched as Richard swung his grim eyes to him. "I tried to live without her," he continued. He paused a moment, taking another small sip of Scotch. "I couldn't do it," he admitted.

Richard visibly relaxed. The social smile returned, maybe mixed with some genuine affection. "Good," he observed.

"You think that ring is going to make everything better?" Emily's voice soared out.

"I think this ring shows that we're committed to making this better!" Lorelai shouted, matching her mother's volume.

In confidence, Richard inclined his head towards Luke again, as they both watched their wives spar. "You know, Emily and I were married very young. We didn't have all of the years apart to make the mistakes you two did, but it's very easy to hurt the ones you love. Their love is what makes them so vulnerable to your slights. You hurt Lorelai very badly, Luke."

Luke clutched his glass and hung his head. "I know," he sighed.

Richard nodded at his admission. "I don't condone her behavior, either. Her actions were monstrous. I'm aware she was under some belief at that moment which she thought justified her actions, but she hurt you terribly, too." Here Richard drew himself up, and Luke realized again just how tall the man was. "I just want to make it clear, Luke," he said levelly, "that if you try to cut my daughter out of your life again, or if you cause her pain like this again, you and I will not be standing together civilly, having a drink."

Luke looked into the determined, dark eyes of the man who had been Lorelai's first protector. The thought bounced into his head of what he would want to do to any guy that treated April or Rory the way he'd treated Lorelai. He swallowed hard again.

"I'm in this, Richard," he promised the man. "I'd like to say I'll never hurt her again, but I'm sure I'll say something stupid down the road and I'll hurt her, whether I mean to or not. But I plan to make a life with her. I plan to take care of her. I don't ever want to be without her again, and I'll do whatever it takes to make sure that happens."

Richard sized up Luke for a moment. "I believe you will," he said finally.

Emily's shrill voice once again drew their attention. "And after I had to call everyone in the family to tell them you're not getting married, you go slink off to who knows where and get married anyway! Honestly, Lorelai! Were you that desperate to not have anyone there to witness your marriage?"

"Rory was there," Lorelai said curtly, her arms folded across her chest.

"Rory?" Emily's stance deflated a bit. "Rory was there?"

"Yes, Rory was there," Lorelai grumbled. "Luke made sure Rory was there."

"Oh." Emily pushed back her hair and blinked a little bit as she glanced around the room. "So," she asked after a moment, grudgingly, "are there any pictures from this alleged wedding?"

Lorelai's head snapped up. "Yes," she said warily.

"Make sure you bring them Friday night." Emily regally walked over to where her gardening accessories had fallen and swooped them up before she continued over to the stairs. "7:30. Don't be late," she admonished. "Richard, we need to get ready. The Mendel's are expecting us by 6."

Richard watched as Emily ascended the stairway before he crossed the room to Lorelai's side. He peered kindly into her face. "Is this what you want?" he asked her, thoughtfully.

Lorelai's face tilted to study him. "Yes," she said cautiously.

He leaned a little closer, making it seem as though he was saying something in confidence to her, although his narrator-quality voice easily made it back to Luke. "If it's not, I know people, you know. We can make this go away."

Lorelai grinned at him then. "I want this, Dad," she insisted.

"Very well, then." He kissed her gently on her forehead. "I wish you both every happiness." He started towards the stairs, following his wife. "Don't be late on Friday," he reminded them as he went.

The room was suddenly bathed in silence and serenity. Luke passed a hand over his face before throwing back the rest of his drink. He set the empty glass down and then hurried over to where Lorelai stood.

"I'm sorry," he said to her at once, enfolding her in his arms. He rocked her gently back and forth. "I'm so sorry. I should have never made you do this. Are you all right?" He stopped his comforting motion and looked her in the face, searching.

"I'm fine," she assured him. She paused for a moment, taking stock. "I'm actually glad we got it over with. That feeling of dread that's usually hovering over me is gone."

Luke took a big breath in relief. "Then let's get out of here."

As he helped her into the Jeep, he let his hand linger over her stomach. "I've changed my mind about ever telling them about the baby," he muttered. "Let's just wait until you're big as a house and let them figure it out on their own."

"Ha!" Lorelai crowed victoriously. "See, you're catching on about how to survive in the Gilmore world!"

By the time he'd made it around the car to climb in himself, her face was creased in consternation. "What makes you think I'm going to be big as a house?" she demanded.

He settled into his seat, grinning. "I saw Sookie. Both times. Remember?"

"Oh." She stared down at herself.

He finally caught on. "Hey, you're not actually anxious about that, are you?" he asked, urging the Jeep to hightail it out of the ritzy neighborhood.

She looked out of her window and worried her bottom lip. "Maybe."

"You really think I'm that shallow?"

"No, but part of why you like me is because of the way I look," she argued.

"Or it could be that the reason I like the way you look is because I like you. If you were 5-foot nothing and blonde, but still you, then I'd like short blondes. Did you ever think of that?" Luke disputed her.

"I guess that makes some sense," Lorelai said slowly, thinking it over.

"I think…" Luke leaned over and took her hand, looking straight ahead as he watched the road. "I think I'm always going to think you're beautiful. And I have a feeling that seeing you carrying our baby is gonna take my breath away."

He glanced over and saw that Lorelai's face was covered with her pleased smile. "You smooth talker," she teased.

"Yep, that's me," he grinned.

They traveled a few miles in contented silence before Lorelai sat up in her seat and pointed down the road.

"Hey, you don't think you're going to Stars Hollow, do you?"

Luke frowned. "Where else would I be going?"

"Woodbridge," she replied matter-of-factly.

"No, I don't think so," Luke said curtly

"Yes, we are," Lorelai insisted.

"Lorelai," he started to complain.

"None of that!" she ordered. "You made me go tell my folks. I still feel bad that April wasn't there. We need to go tell her now."

He shook his head. "I don't know. Springing something like this just sounds like a colossally bad idea."

"Holding it back is just going to make it worse," she refuted. "It looks like we're hiding it."

Luke glanced down at his watch. "I don't even know where April would be right now," he grumbled.

"Oh, no. No, no, no," Lorelai was shaking her head now, emphatically. "We don't tell April first. We go to Anna first. We tell her first. Otherwise it just looks like we're going behind her back, and that's one thing you never want an insecure, possessive mom to think. No," she continued, sounding very sure of herself, "we go see her first. And somehow, we need to make it sound like we're asking her permission to tell April, although we're really not."

Luke had to admit that there was some sense in what she was saying. "You think we can pull that off?" he asked skeptically.

"I think we need to at least try," Lorelai said, her forehead crinkling in thought. "We need to get this started in a new direction. We need some new rules with her. Otherwise I'm afraid we'll just slip right back… to where we were."

Luke heard how her voice faltered at the end. He looked out the window and rubbed at his face. He thought about standing with Lorelai outside the door at her parents' house, hoping that his presence beside her gave her some strength. He now hoped that having her by his side would help him face down Anna.

"OK," he said glumly. "But this is all on you. I'm not taking a bullet for you."

She grinned at him, hearing her own words bounced back at her. "Fair enough."

They sat in nervous silence the rest of the way to Woodbridge, both of them fidgeting in worry. By the time they found a parking spot in front of Anna's shop, both of them were ready to turn around and run to Stars Hollow.

As they walked up to the door of the shop, Luke heard Lorelai panting for breath. He looked over and grabbed her around the waist when he saw the ashen, queasy look on her face.

"Hey," he said, leaning down to her, rubbing her back gently. He knew this time it wasn't an act. "We don't have to do this today. Let's just get you home."

She gulped down a few mouthfuls of air. "It's just nerves," she told him. "I'll be all right. Let's just get it over with." She patted his arm and tried her best to smile.

Against his better judgment, Luke opened the door for them to enter. On top of his other worries about how this summit meeting was going to go, he now added what Anna's reaction would be if Lorelai threw up all over her merchandise. Or on her. That evil thought actually made him smile a little bit, and that was what Anna saw when she looked up and saw them entering the empty store.

Her brows knitted together and she crossed the room briskly, confronting them before they could get more than two steps inside the door.

"What are you doing here?" she snapped at Luke. "It's not on the schedule for you to see April today. And after the way you just up and disappeared last week, I don't know if I can trust you to keep up this visitation plan, anyway. And what is _she_ doing here?" she fumed, pointing at Lorelai.

"_She_ has a name," Luke said, through gritted teeth. "Her name is Lorelai. As a matter of fact," he added, suddenly feeling dangerously daring, "as of last Friday, her name is Lorelai Danes. Does that meet with your approval?"

Anna gasped and her face paled in shock, soon replaced by fury. "Oh, you didn't," she said, warningly. "You ran off and got married to her? Without discussing what that was going to mean for April?" She laughed harshly. "Well, I guess now I know where April rates in your life. I guess I don't have to try and find some way to fit you in anymore!"

Luke opened his mouth, but Lorelai beat him to it.

"Back off, lady!" she ordered. Luke had heard that tone in her voice before, usually when she was defending Rory, but he hadn't heard it for a long, long time.

"Lorelai," he ventured.

She held up a hand towards him. "It's OK, Luke. I've got this," she said pleasantly, facing down Anna.

"Watch it," Anna warned her.

"You don't get it," Lorelai told her, taking a step closer to her, and Luke bit back a smile as he watched Anna back up. "You really don't get it. We've been tiptoeing around you, all cautious and careful, always so 'Oh, don't upset Anna!' Well, no more! You need to understand that he—" she pointed at Luke—"is a wonderful man. He's kind and loving and all he wants to do is to get to know his daughter. His daughter! _His!_" She paused a moment to regroup and grab a breath. "And I love him. I love him with my whole heart." She gave a little grim-sounding laugh. "But here's what you don't get. As much as I love him, and as much as I hate what you did to him, I'm still on your side! How messed up is that?" she cried out harshly.

"I…" Anna started to say hotly, but Lorelai overpowered her.

"Because see, I'm practically you. Well, if you leave out the part about how you hid your daughter from her father for 12 years, because frankly, that's some serious control-freaky stuff there, if you ask me. But I raised my kid on my own. I know exactly what that's like. I know all about the fear that someone else could take your place; could worm her way into your daughter's heart. Into that place that's always been yours. I understand that. But guess what? I've already got my own kid. I don't want yours. I _would_ like to be her friend, though. I would like to get to know her. And that's my prerogative now, because I'm married to her father. And I understand how weird that is for you. I know how that screws with your head, when you see your ex with someone else. Believe me, I've been there."

"You think I _care_ that he's with you?" Anna disputed her loudly.

"I know you do. It doesn't matter how long ago it was or how it ended, or whether or not there's still any actual feelings there. There's just something about seeing your ex happy with someone else that makes you doubt yourself. Makes you think, why her and not me?"

"You're delusional," Anna muttered.

"No, I'm not," Lorelai said, advancing further. Anna was now backed up against the counter. "I know all sorts of stuff. Do you want to know what else? I know April is a really bright girl. She already figured out who her father was when you wouldn't tell her. Right now she's still at that stage where she thinks you're perfect, but that's all going to fade really soon, especially when she realizes you're the one causing the problems between her and Luke. Do you want to know what really terrifies you? If she bonds with Luke, that means she'll actually have someplace else to go. When things get ugly with you, she'll actually have an alternative." Lorelai chuckled bitterly. "Like I say, I understand better than you can possibly imagine."

Anna looked away, her fingers nervously clutching at the counter. "That'll never happen," she insisted, although her voice lacked conviction. "Not between me and April!"

Lorelai shrugged. "Maybe not. Maybe you'll get lucky. But you keep acting like a crazy person and make it harder for her to be around her dad, eventually she's going to get fed up with the theatrics. And the older she gets, the more she's the one who determines what she's going to do. That's just a fact of life. You can't control her forever. And seriously, what's the downside here, if Luke and I get to know her better? That just means April has two more people in her corner. How is that bad?" Lorelai's voice had changed into a softer, gentler tone, and had taken on more of her wheedling quality by the end.

Anna's eyes darted around her store as she gulped in a shaky breath. "Maybe it's not," she muttered.

Lorelai glanced over to where Luke had settled back against a display table, his arms crossed over his chest as he enjoyed the show. "Um, anything you want to add here?" she asked him, suddenly sounding nervous.

"I think you've pretty well covered it," he told her, trying not to grin. He straightened up and walked over to stand in front of Anna too. His face and voice lost the amusement. "I would like to see my daughter now," he stated. "We would like to tell her we're married. We'd like to share our news with her. Like you say, it does affect her, and we'd like her to know as soon as possible. I don't think that's unreasonable at all, do you?"

Anna scowled and bit her lip. She looked over at a clock resting by the cash register. "She's just getting out of her swim team practice. It's over at the Natatorium on 7th. You've dropped her off there a couple of times, remember?" She grudgingly gave out the information.

"You're saying it's OK if we go pick her up?" Luke questioned, his hands on his hips as he tried to figure out this woman in front of him. She might as well have been a total stranger for all the more he understood her.

"Oh sure, it's fine," Anna snapped out sarcastically. She closed her eyes and drew in a long breath. "There might be something in what you say, that it's better for April if we all work together."

"Better for you, too," Lorelai said gently. When Anna's eyes flew open, startled, Lorelai nodded at her. "Trust me," she told the woman, holding her gaze.

Finally Anna shrugged and looked away, fighting to maintain her icy composure. "Just bring her back here after you talk to her."

"Of course," Luke agreed. He touched Lorelai's elbow and they started towards the door. "Do you think she could spend some time with us in Stars Hollow this weekend?"

Anna gave an annoyed look towards the ceiling. "I'll have to check the calendar." She sighed. "But it's probably OK."

"Good." Luke nodded, reaching for the door. "I'll call you later."

"Hey, Luke," Anna called, just as they stepped over the threshold.

He poked his head back in to look at her, trying to stifle his irritation at whatever restriction she was going to decree. He noticed that she no longer seemed as angry.

"You know," she said, sounding almost amused, "I used to think one of the reasons we broke up was because I was just too feisty for you." She laughed a tad bitterly, and pointed out the door to where Lorelai was standing. "I guess I was wrong."

He felt a smile crack across his face. He nodded at her and closed the door.

Lorelai was waiting on him a few steps away. He could see the doubts starting to swirl through her now, eating away at the confidence she'd just displayed inside. He hurried over to her, putting his hands on her shoulders. He gently kissed the top of her head. "Welcome back," he said to her.

"What?" Her blue eyes were dark and huge with worry.

"You sounded like yourself in there," he told her. "I haven't heard you like that for a really long time. I've missed that." He felt his throat closing up a little bit and he fought against it. "You sounded like my Lorelai again." His voice was gruff.

She squeezed her eyes shut in relief. "You're not mad? I kinda got carried away in there."

"Nah. You're just feisty," he told her, trying to joke. But then he cleared his throat and spoke seriously. "The only person I'm mad at is me. I should have brought you with me the very first time I came over here. We should have fought for April together. I'm sorry, Lorelai. I'm sorry I left you out. I'm sorry I tried to do this alone."

She buried her face in his chest and clutched at his arms. He stroked her hair and held her tightly to him. Finally Lorelai took a small step back, still clinging to his arms, her face shining as she looked at him.

"We're…We're going to be OK, aren't we?" she asked, her voice nearly sounding giddy.

"Yeah, we are." He smiled at her, feeling the little bit of doubt he'd still been hiding pop like a balloon and sail off into the atmosphere. "We're going to be fine."

* * *

They parked across the street from the indoor swimming facility and soon spied April walking out the side door with two other girls. She had a clear plastic bag slung over her shoulder and her wet hair was starting to dry into a wild cloud of frizz.

They scrambled to get out of the Jeep and get her attention. "I can give her much knowledge on how to tame her hair," Lorelai panted as they rushed across the street.

Luke spared a glance at her as he raised his hand. "April!" he called over to the girl.

She turned, as did the other two girls. They all started over to meet them, and Luke and Lorelai, realized that the other girls were Chelsea and Tamara, who'd been at April's birthday party.

For a few minutes there was a lot of chatter from the three 13-year-olds and from Lorelai, who slipped into 13-year-old chatter mode herself. Luke stepped back, observing the scene in amusement. Finally a small pause in the conversation left him room to step in.

"Your mom said it was OK if Lorelai and I brought you home," he told April. "We'd like to talk to you for a little bit."

"Um, sure," April shrugged. "See you guys," she said to her friends, stepping over closer to the adults as she shifted her bag.

"I saw a Dairy Queen just down the street. How about if we score a Blizzard while we talk?" Lorelai suggested.

April turned her serious eyes on her. "I'm not much on the sweet stuff," she stated, "but some onion rings might be good."

Luke watched Lorelai's eyes widen in shock. She gave him a look then that he knew without a doubt meant 'She's your daughter!'

"Yes, she is," he said out loud to Lorelai. "Only I wouldn't eat the onion rings, either."

"His eating habits are freaky," April complained to Lorelai as they started to walk down the street.

"Yes, they are," Lorelai agreed at once. "But we love him anyway!"

April shot her an appraising look.

The temperature inside the eatery was icy compared to the hot July day outside. April, still damp from swimming, started to shiver at once. As soon as their order was completed they hurried outside to eat at a table set in the sun.

Luke shuddered as he sipped at his water, watching Lorelai attack her swirled ice cream concoction laced with Reece's pieces. April ran an onion ring through a pool of ketchup and munched with gusto.

"So, April," he hedged, unsure of how to begin, "there's something we'd like to talk to you about."

She nodded, licking her lips. "You guys are married."

Lorelai's spoon stopped in midair and Luke's hand nearly crushed the flimsy paper cup holding his water.

"How did you know?" Lorelai asked.

"I saw the rings." April shrugged, carelessly picking up another onion ring. "I notice stuff. I'm pretty observant. That's one of the reasons I'm so good at the science stuff."

Luke tried to search Lorelai's expression to figure out what to say next. "We got married last Friday," he finally said.

April tore an onion ring into fourths and then proceeded to eat each piece. "I thought you guys broke up," she observed.

"We did," Luke confirmed, "but we didn't like being apart."

April nodded, her eyes never leaving the red blob of ketchup in front of her. "I thought it might have been because of me."

Lorelai gasped and at once reached for April's hand. "Oh, honey, no!" she insisted, lowering her head to look into the girl's face.

April looked at Lorelai calmly. "Well, you were never around. I figured there had to be a reason."

That caused Luke to take in a harsh breath. "April, that was my fault. Lorelai wanted to be there, and I kept her away. I had some weird idea that you and I needed some time for just the two of us, so that I could figure out how to be a father. But that was a stupid idea."

April regarded Luke coolly. "Ideas themselves aren't really stupid. You just have to test them out and see if they're practical or not. You know, see if they'll hold up. What's stupid is to keep going when you see it's not working."

Luke blinked at his daughter's serious brown eyes for a heartbeat or two. "Keeping you and Lorelai apart wasn't working. She's a huge part of my life, and I hope you're going to be a huge part of my life, too. The two of you need to be together."

"That's logical." April absently dunked a piece of onion ring for a couple of seconds. "I know Mom's been problematic, too."

Once again Luke and Lorelai's eyes met over the table.

"We…We talked to your mom today," Lorelai revealed. "I think…I hope we have a better understanding now."

"That'd be good." April munched for a few beats. "So, you're like my stepmother now, huh?"

"Yes." Lorelai nervously rubbed a napkin over her fingers.

"That's cool." April nodded her head as she opened up another ketchup packet. "My friends think you're awesome. They still talk about my birthday party."

"Well…" Lorelai shot a glance at Luke. "Maybe we can do something like that again over the summer."

April continued to thoughtfully stare at the designs she'd swirled into the ketchup. "So, that means that Rory's like my stepsister, right?"

"That's right," Luke agreed.

April's head shot up. "Is she in Stars Hollow?"

"No, not right now. She's working at a summer internship right now," Lorelai informed her.

"Oh," April said, sounding disappointed.

"It's not that far away," Lorelai said cheerfully. "It's just past Philadelphia. She comes home sometimes."

"Really?" April's face brightened. "Could we go see her, maybe?"

"Um, sure, I guess," Lorelai shrugged, looking over at Luke for guidance.

"Will she be home soon?"

"Well, she's got another four weeks on this job, and then I think she might fly over to visit her boyfriend in London―"

"London!" April interrupted. "Cool!"

Lorelai grinned. "But she'll probably be home as much as she can. She misses Stars Hollow and her mommy, even though she won't admit it."

"So, does Yale do the thing where siblings can come spend a weekend? I mean, I'd totally qualify for that now, right? That would be super awesome, if I could spend a whole weekend there with her." April's eagerness was apparent in her words and posture.

"Uh…" Luke looked helplessly over at Lorelai. "We'd have to run it by Rory, and your mom, too, but I guess that'd be OK―"

"You know, there's a ton of stuff I'd like to talk to her about," April cut him off, her thoughts running together. "I need to decide pretty quickly where I'm going to go to high school. Rory went to Chilton, right? I'd love get her insights on that. I've got this chart I've been working on. Hey, do you have her email? It'd be OK if I'd email her, right?"

Lorelai's eyes were starting to glint with amusement. "I'm sure it'd be OK," she said, grinning at Luke.

"So, what's this internship about? How did she get it? Does she get school credit for it, or will it just look good on her résumé?" She eagerly peppered them with Rory questions.

Luke leaned back in his chair, smiling, slowly shaking his head as Lorelai answered all of his daughter's questions. For the first time since leaving their hotel room that morning he felt completely content.

* * *

Luke heard Lorelai make a muffled noise from her seat in the Jeep as he finally drove towards Stars Hollow.

"What?" he asked cautiously.

She tried again to stifle the giggles that were trying to break out of her. "Nothing," she squeaked.

He smiled in spite of himself. It was good to hear her giggly. "Tell me," he urged.

The laughter pealed out of her. "It's just, here we've been, all of this time, so concerned about April. You were scared to let me around her, for fear she'd like me better than you. I was terrified she wouldn't like me at all. And here all that matters to her…is Rory! She's a Rory groupie! She doesn't care about us at all!"

Luke grinned ruefully as he signaled a turn. "That does appear to be the case."

"Oh, wow." Lorelai sighed thankfully, relaxing back into her seat. "Today's been good, huh?"

"Pretty good," Luke agreed.

Lorelai sighed again. "I have to say, I'm not exactly looking forward to the third degree we're going to get from the town. I wish we could just settle in and not have to explain it to everybody."

Luke scowled. "That's for sure."

Lorelai sat up straighter. Her hands waved in excitement. "What if we could?"

"How would we do that? You know the gossips are going to be all over us the second we get there."

"Well, what if we had a sort of…spokesperson. A representative. Someone who'd field all of the inquiries for us."

"What are you talking about?"

"On TV, you know, every time a family has some sort of trauma, they usually don't speak to the reporters. They always appoint the family lawyer, or a friend, or someone as their spokesperson. That's what it always says under their picture. You know, 'Thaddeus So-and-So, Representative of the Smith Family' or something like that," Lorelai explained.

"And how does that relate to us?" Luke questioned.

"Well, when Miss Patty comes up and peppers you for details about our honeymoon, you say, 'Sorry, Patty, you'll have to ask our designated spokesperson about that.'" Lorelai made her voice go deep as she pretended to speak as Luke.

"And who would that be?" he asked, shaking his head at yet another of Lorelai's crazy ideas.

"Sookie," she answered at once.

His eyebrows rose as he glanced over at her. "Sookie?"

She nodded seriously. "I kind of feel bad, Luke, that we ran off and didn't tell her. Maybe if we go tell her now, before anyone else, and let her trump the rest of the gossips, it won't hurt her feelings as much. Could we? Could we go tell her now?"

He sighed as impatience tugged at him. He was never going to get back to the diner at this rate.

"All right," he muttered.

"Yay!" Lorelai squealed. "Go back behind the Dragonfly property to that access road. Pull up behind the stables, so we're hidden from the main building," she ordered, grabbing for her phone.

The Jeep had barely coasted to a stop before Sookie's auburn head came into view. Lorelai jumped out and Sookie headed right for her, still clutching a wooden spoon with some sort of red sauce clinging to it.

"You're back!" Sookie shouted joyfully, throwing her arms around Lorelai and squeezing tightly. Just then Luke climbed out of the other side of the Jeep, drawing her attention.

"Oh!" she gasped, stepping back away from Lorelai's embrace. "You're together. Oh my God! You're _together_!" She jumped up and down in joy, then abruptly stilled. "Wait. Are you really together?"

"We're together," Lorelai confirmed.

"Oh my God! That's fantastic! You know, in the back of my head I was wondering, because you were gone, and he was gone, and I kept thinking, wow, wouldn't it be something if you were actually together, but here you are, and you're actually together! I can't believe it!" She hugged Lorelai tightly as they squealed and jumped up and down. "So you guys made up?" she asked breathlessly.

"Actually, Sook," Lorelai took a deep breath and looked over at Luke, "we actually did a little bit more than made up."

Sookie waggled her eyebrows as she chuckled knowingly. "I just bet you did!"

"No, no, Sookie, I mean…" Once again Lorelai looked over at Luke but he didn't give her any hints on how to proceed. "We, uh…We got married, Sook."

All of the excitement left Sookie. "You did what?" she asked soberly.

"We got married." Lorelai gulped at the dismayed look on Sookie's face. "Last Friday, in Maryland. We're…married," she repeated again.

Sookie eyes nervously bounced back and forth between Lorelai and Luke. "Are you sure that was the smart thing to do?" she finally asked, hesitantly. "Are you sure you shouldn't have taken this reconciliation thing a little slower?"

Lorelai looked down at the ground for a minute before stepping closer to Sookie. She took her hands and looked into her face. "Sookie. If you'd messed up, and you'd lost Jackson, but then you had this opportunity for a second chance with him, wouldn't you take it? Wouldn't you want your life together to start as soon as possible?" Lorelai shook her head slightly as she rubbed Sookie's hands with hers. "Luke gave me this chance. I didn't want to wait anymore," she said softly.

The green bandana on Sookie's head bobbed as she nodded her head slightly, but she couldn't look Lorelai in the eyes. She looked over at Luke instead. "Luke?" she asked doubtfully.

Luke walked around the car to join the two women. He slung his arm over Lorelai's shoulders as he faced Sookie. "This was the right thing for us to do, Sookie," he said simply. "It was what we needed to do."

Sookie sucked in a huge breath of air. "Wow. You're married." She stared at them for several long moments. "You're really married?"

Lorelai smiled proudly and displayed her ring, pulling on Luke's hand to show his, as well. "And I've got the marriage certificate, some slightly wilted flowers and a kid somewhere in Pennsylvania who'll back me up."

Dimples flashed on Sookie's face as her excitement returned. "This will be the biggest news in Stars Hollow since Gina Pruitt went skinny dipping back in '84 and her undies ended up mixed in with the lettuce in Taylor's produce section!"

"How did…Who?" Lorelai asked, momentarily taken aback.

"Tell you later," Luke promised.

Sookie's brain was working overtime. "I need to bake you a cake! Ooh! A wedding cake! We can throw a party! Here, at the Dragonfly! This is so exciting!"

"No party," Luke said firmly.

"No party, Sook," Lorelai repeated, gently. "We just want to start our lives together. No drama, no excitement, no gossip. We don't want to be the center of attention."

"Oh," Sookie sighed, disappointed.

"Tell her," Luke urged.

"What we would like," Lorelai told her friend, "is for you to be our spokesperson. We'd like you to tell everybody for us. Would you do that for us?"

"Everybody who?"

"Everybody everybody. Everybody in town. Anybody who'll bug us for the whole story. We want to give you the job of getting the word out. Can we count on you?"

Sookie looked at Lorelai in confusion, then looked questioningly up at Luke. "Me? You're sure about this?"

"I certainly don't want to repeat this a thousand times to all of the crazy people in town," Luke said emphatically.

Lorelai nodded in agreement and looked hopefully at her friend.

Sookie looked around, wetting her lips as she considered. "Well," she said, smiling her bubbly smile as she once again started to bob on her toes, "then you need to fill me in on all of the details! Don't leave out a thing!" she playfully threatened, swinging the wooden spoon over her head in emphasis.

Lorelai threw back her head and laughed. She put her arm around Sookie and led her over to a bench by Cletus' stall. "We decided to get out of town," she started, "and Luke drove us to a town in Maryland called Harve de Grace, which is the duck decoy capital of the world. I'd slept most of the way there, so it was a surprise to me…"

Luke leaned back against the Jeep, letting the warm sunshine bake into his shoulders and relieve some of the tension that had collected in them after the long day of driving. He closed his eyes and smiled as he listened to Lorelai telling their story, minus just a few details here and there. In his mind he could picture Lorelai telling the same story again someday, only this time she was sitting in a rocking chair, holding their baby. It was a good story, he decided. A really good story.

* * *

At long last Luke turned into Liz's driveway and turned off the Jeep. He sighed and stretched, trying to loosen the kink in his back before he turned to look at Lorelai. "Do you think you can get over to the house on your own?"

Since he was looking right at her, he saw her face change. He saw that mask-like look slip back down over her happy face. He watched her gulp and squeeze shut her eyes. He watched her nod and act like everything was fine.

"Sure," she said blithely, pulling on her ponytail. "No problem."

"Hey, what's wrong?" He reached out and grabbed her arm, stopping her from getting out of the car. "Are you feeling bad? We've had a really long day. If you're pooped, I can drive you home first and get you settled, and then come back for my truck. It's no big deal."

"No, Luke, it's fine." Her voice sounded brittle to his ears. "I can take it from here."

"Are you sure?" he asked, still worried.

"Sure," she replied. "I understand. You've got things to do. I got it."

He nodded. "Yeah, I thought I could take the truck and get a load of my stuff to the house yet tonight. It stays light so late, and I don't have that much to bring."

For several long moments she sat as if turned to stone. Finally she swiveled to look at him.

"You're moving in," she stated, her voice full of wonder.

"Yeah." He rubbed at his forehead, wondering if he'd somehow misread the situation. "I figure husbands and wives live together, right?"

A chuckle bubbled up out of her. "You want us to live together."

He shook his head, still confused. "Don't you?"

She lost all control then and laughed until tears spilled down her cheeks. She threw her arms around him. "Yes, I really, really want us to live together." She drew a breath and he felt her trying to get herself under control. "That's what I've always wanted."

He patted her smooth hair and rubbed at her shoulders, working his hands down. "I should have moved in a long time ago, Lorelai," he said, letting the regret he'd always felt about that color his words. "I should have been there with you."

She pulled back away from him, beaming. "You'll be there now."

He started to get out of the Jeep. "You're sure you're OK on your own? Don't feel like you have to carry everything out of the Jeep. I can do that when I get there."

"I'll be fine," she assured him happily.

"OK. Then I'll see you at home."

"OK," Lorelai repeated, watching him walk towards his sister's garage. "See you at home."

* * *

_Home._

Lorelai put her shoulder against the door to her house and gave a shove as she twisted the key in the lock. She stumbled over the threshold when the door opened easier than she expected. She saw bits and pieces of junk from her purse still littering the floor from where she'd dumped it the night she realized she was pregnant.

She dropped the bags she was carrying onto the couch and looked around slowly. Had it really been less than a week since that night in the tastefully-appointed restroom at Burger King?

The house smelled musty after being shut up for so many days. All sorts of debris was scattered around from her panic that night and from her frantic packing the next morning. And over everything was the silence.

She swallowed hard and walked slowly through the downstairs. There were no little toenails skittering on the hardwood floors, welcoming her home. There was no leash on the backdoor. She didn't need to check any waterbowls, or reach into the cabinet to pull out a treat. She ended up back in the living room next to the fireplace, staring down at the spot on the floor she'd tried to avoid ever since that third night in June.

The house was silent, and still, and lifeless. She made a small humming noise, just to break the silence and to prove to herself that her ears still worked. She bowed her head, letting regret once more overpower her.

She didn't know how long she stood there, mourning Paul Anka, tormenting herself over her actions, doubting herself even now.

But then she heard something. It was faint but she knew what it was, and her heartbeat sped up.

She turned and headed for the door, throwing off her regrets as she went to fling open the door for her husband.

She ran out to the porch, watching as he backed the truck in the driveway. Their house was no longer going to be silent and lifeless, and she briefly closed her eyes in thankfulness. "Welcome home!" she shouted out to him.

Home. They were home.


	8. Heartbeats

Luke rushed into the house through the front door, making a beeline for the kitchen. He diverted for just a second to swing by the coffee table, where his fingers automatically touched the head of the duck decoy sitting proudly in the middle. Lorelai had placed it there the day after their return from Maryland, getting rid of the wooden bowl filled with ancient nuts that she and Rory had kept out as a joke for years. He wasn't sure why he had to do that every time he went through the room, but he did. Superstition had nothing to do with it. It was more like he needed to feel the smooth carvings under his fingers to reassure himself that the past few weeks hadn't been a dream. They were married, and this was his house, and he was happier than he had any right to be.

He flicked on the light in the kitchen and opened the freezer door on the refrigerator, pulling out a baggie full of meatballs. Lorelai had had an intense craving for spaghetti and meatballs over the weekend and he'd made a double batch. He hoped that still sounded good to her.

He grabbed a pot for the spaghetti and took time to quickly wash his hands before filling it with water and setting it over a burner on the stove.

When they first got home from Maryland they'd talked about how important it was for them to find time to be together. They'd figured out a schedule but soon found out it wasn't necessary. They craved time together. They were impatient with anything that forced them to be apart. They found ingenious ways to make their schedules jive as much as possible. Tonight, for example, Lorelai was working later at the inn, while Luke had arranged for Caesar to close so that he could get home and fix dinner for them. In the morning, Caesar would open and Lorelai wouldn't need to get to the Dragonfly until after 10.

The honeymoon - Thank God - was still in full swing.

Soon another pan filled with tomato sauce joined the waiting-to-boil water on the stove and the meatballs were defrosting in the microwave. He moved to the sink, washing salad greens, and something outside caught his eye.

Babette was waving at him madly, and when he casually acknowledged her she beamed with delight before she went back to watering the geraniums surrounding her gnomes.

The response to their marriage from the citizens of Stars Hollow had been remarkably low-key. It was obvious they were happy for them, and he'd received more than one pat on the back and had heard the comment numerous times that things were now back the way they were supposed to be. Sookie had done an admirable job as their spokesperson until even she had had enough. She'd created an online blog, posting all of the pertinent facts about their elopement, including pictures and an eye-witness account from Rory. Now when inquiries were directed to her she just handed out cards she'd printed up with the web address.

He wondered how crazy things would get when the baby news was added to the pot. So far Rory was still the only one who knew. Lorelai's parents had been away on a trip, which meant they'd only had one Friday night dinner to contend with and everyone on that night had been ultra-polite and cautious with the desire not to rock any boats, enabling them to escape any further prying. He knew that wouldn't last much longer. Lorelai wouldn't be able to use the excuse again that she didn't want a drink because of some cold medication she was using. They'd be forced to tell soon.

Her first doctor's appointment was next week. The reminder card was stuck to the front of the refrigerator, right next to the calendar April had printed up for them, listing the dates when Rory would be home.

He had to chuckle a little bit to himself as he remembered the look on Rory's face last weekend, when April had attached herself to Rory and couldn't be pried away. Rory had turned into a exemplary big sister, though, and had answered all of April's countless questions with good humor. The two girls appeared to be off to a great start in their relationship.

The front door opened and a small spot of constant apprehension disappeared when Luke heard it.

In moments, Lorelai's arms were snaked around his waist, her mouth against his neck. She sniffed in appreciation.

"Smells good, huh?" he observed, leaning his head over to rub against hers.

"We should bottle it," she replied, a sultry note in her voice.

"It's just spaghetti sauce," he reminded her.

"I'm talking about you," she informed him, letting her hands roam. "I can smell every single thing you cooked today, plus your shower soap from this morning. You smell good, Babe."

He rolled his eyes. "I thought pregnant women were supposed to be all nauseous from cooking smells, not turned on."

"Just goes to show you how wrong those books can be."

He turned around to look her over, searching for any signs that she wasn't as chipper as she appeared. "How have you been today?" he asked anxiously, pushing her hair back while he studied her eyes.

"I'm fine, Luke," she sighed.

He could hear the impatience creeping into her voice. She'd had an unexpected return of morning sickness the week before, and ever since then he knew he'd been driving her crazy with his concern.

"You'd tell me, right, if you weren't?" he asked, needing to hear her reassurance again.

"I'm really tired, but I feel great," she confirmed. "Michel found me nodding off at my desk this afternoon. But otherwise, I feel fantastic. I think it's all the sex," she confided to him.

He smirked at that, even as he shook his head. "That's something else the books got wrong. You're not supposed to be like that until the second trimester."

"See? You can't believe everything you read," she commented, patting his cheek. "OK, I'm running up to change. How soon do we eat? Because if it's not like really soon, I'm gonna need a snack to tide me over."

"I'll have something on the table by the time you get back down here," he promised, starting to turn back to the stove.

She grabbed him and spun him back around. "Maybe I'll just snack on you," she said breathlessly, helping herself to a kiss.

Things heated up quickly in the kitchen, including the pan of boiling water. It was the sound of the water sizzling on the hot burner as it jumped out of the steaming pot that finally got Luke's attention.

"Go," he ordered, tearing himself away from her. He turned down the heat under the pot and grabbed for the spaghetti. "Let me finish making dinner and we can_ snack_ later."

"OK," Lorelai said happily, and rushed out of the room.

Later, when he thought back on it, he didn't know how he'd even heard her.

The sauce was bubbling and the microwave was running and his boots were clomping over the floor as he moved about, putting the finishing touches on their dinner. But somehow he heard her faint, anguished voice, calling him from somewhere in the house.

"_Luke,_" he heard. That was all.

Dread chilled him through to the bone. He knew. Somehow, he just knew.

He had enough presence of mind to shut off the burners. Then he turned and ran.

He saw her standing at the top of the stairs and he took them two at a time, not able to get to her fast enough. He searched her face that was so dead white it looked as though every bit of blood had drained out of her.

"Luke," she whispered again, her eyes huge and frightened. She bit at her lips for a moment before she could force anything else out. "I'm bleeding."

His eyes drilled into hers. He couldn't comprehend what she was saying. With a jolt he grabbed her arms and turned them over, looking for blood dripping from a vein.

"No, no!" she cried, pulling her arms back. "No, Luke. The baby." When he still looked at her dumbly, she added, heartbreakingly, "I'm bleeding."

"Oh, God." It burst out of him as it hit him. He got his arms around her and turned, pulling her down the stairs with him.

He sat her down on the couch while he shoved a pair of flip-flops on her feet. He blinked at the duck on the coffee table and turned away abruptly, unable to look at the symbol of their happiness that seemed to be mocking him now. He felt her starting to shiver uncontrollably and he grabbed the fleece throw from the back of the couch while he started her towards the door.

"Purse," she told him, and for a moment he thought she was speaking a foreign language. "Insurance card," she added, and then he understood and grabbed her purse as they went by the desk.

The Jeep was blocking his truck, so he guided her into the passenger side of it. He bundled her in, tucking the throw around her shivering shoulders.

"It's gonna be OK," he mumbled automatically, and then cringed while he raced around to the driver's side. He didn't know that it was going to be OK at all.

He floored the Jeep the second they were outside the city limits. He cursed the budget cuts that had closed the Stars Hollow clinic years ago, forcing it to merge with the urgent care facility in Litchfield. He couldn't believe that he was now flying down the road that he used to drive at a snail's pace, back when it led to Nicole. His head thundered with regrets.

With effort, he ignored them, and concentrated instead on his driving and on Lorelai, sitting motionless and mute beside him.

He reached over and found her icy hand. He clasped it tightly.

"It's OK," he made himself say again. "It's gonna be OK, Lorelai."

She squeezed her eyes shut and gave the tiniest shake of her head, as though conserving movement was somehow going to make a difference.

At last he spotted the sign for the clinic. The tires squealed as he made the turn into the parking lot.

It turned out that practically carrying Lorelai into the clinic all bundled up and with her dead-white face garnered them instant attention. They were both hustled back into an examining room immediately, where a clerk asked him dozens of questions from a clipboard while two others assisted Lorelai. He answered the questions distractedly, trying hard to follow what they were doing and saying to Lorelai.

"Next of kin?"

"What?" he asked, in a haze.

"Next of kin?" The young woman with the clipboard repeated her question patiently, her pen hovering over the paper.

Luke tore his eyes away from the medical personnel helping Lorelai up onto the examining table.

"Um, that'd be her daughter. Rory. Rory Gilmore. Wait…" He fumbled at his pocket, trying to pull out his phone.

"Babe."

"I've got her number; just give me a second…" His fingers didn't want to work as he tried to scroll through the numbers.

"Luke."

This time he heard her and his head jerked around. Thankfully he saw that she was giving him a shallow smile from where her head rested on the thin pillow on the table. Now that the doctor was with her, she seemed calmer.

"Luke. You're my next of kin, Babe."

"Oh." He blinked rapidly a few times, before turning back to the young clerk and her clipboard. "Yeah, that'd be me."

Lorelai found the strength to smile at the doctor and nurse attending to her. She pointed at her wedding band. "This whole 'being married' thing is still kinda new to us," she explained.

"Well, congratulations," the nurse murmured to her, helping her move into position for the doctor.

In actuality the exam only took a few minutes, but to Luke it might as well have been days.

"Well, good news!" the doctor said briskly, after taking a quick assessment. "It's not a miscarriage."

"Oh!" Lorelai's body relaxed visibly, rustling against the scratchy paper sheet on the exam table. Her eyes quivered closed while she took a deep breath.

Luke made his way to the head of the table, where he was able to stroke her hair. The relief shooting through him made him shaky. Lorelai reached her hand up to him and he took it and held on fiercely. She was able to tip her head back enough to see him, giving him one of those blinding smiles of hers, and that more than anything let him know that things were OK.

"You've got an errant piece of tissue up here," the doctor continued, poking around some more. "Normally not a big deal at all, but the crazy pregnancy hormones have got it all inflamed, and it's bleeding. When do you see your doctor?"

"Next week," Lorelai sighed, still holding Luke in her gaze.

"Well, he or she might want to take care of that for you, just so it doesn't scare you again. But everything else looks good."

"She's OK?" Luke's voice came out harsher than he intended. "The baby's OK?"

The doctor studied him a moment from her spot between Lorelai's legs. She shifted her attention back to Lorelai. "How far along are you?"

"Eight weeks," Lorelai replied instantly.

"Hey, Marcie," she said to the nurse, "let's try something to see if we can give them some reassurance here."

She helped Lorelai down from the stirrups and then pulled the sheet down a little, exposing a portion of her stomach, while the nurse rummaged through a drawer.

"This might not work," the doctor warned them. "It's awfully early, and we don't have the fancy equipment your ob-gyn does. But you're a skinny-minnie, so we might have a shot here."

The nurse handed the doctor a white wand, then squeezed a blob of gel onto Lorelai's skin. The doctor pressed the wand below Lorelai's navel, but above her pubic bone, listening intently.

"What―" Luke started to ask, just as a loud, impossibly fast, 'whoosha-whoosha' sound filled the room.

"Oh!" Lorelai gasped out, squeezing his hand tighter than ever, her face transfixed in joy.

"What is that?" In his heart, Luke thought he knew, but he was still too shaken to make assumptions.

"It's her!" Lorelai quavered. "Or him! It's the baby, Luke!"

Marcie, being a good, experienced nurse, knew to slide a stool under his butt at that exact moment. He plopped down onto it gratefully, still holding onto Lorelai as if their baby depended on it. He listened to the amplified heartbeat in absolute wonder.

"It's supposed to be that fast?" he asked, his forehead still creased in worry.

"Yes. It sounds just the way it's supposed to," the doctor told him, smiling kindly. "I think everything's right on track."

"Thank God." And Luke, not wanting all of the women in the room to see him collapse in relief, laid his head down next to Lorelai's, pressing her soft, dark curls against his damp face, as the beats from their baby's heart washed over him.

* * *

They held it together while they got Lorelai dressed. They listened, nodding, when they were told what to mention to Lorelai's doctor the next week. They chatted with the receptionist as they completed the never-ending paperwork and paid the bill. They walked out to the Jeep, Luke carefully guiding Lorelai still, the blanket now neatly folded over his arm.

He helped her into the car. And that was as far as he could keep up the charade. He latched his arms around her, drawing her into him, gasping for breath while he tried to keep from losing it completely.

She clung to him, patting his back soothingly, making nonsense sounds of reassurance.

"I was so scared," she finally whispered to him, her voice breaking.

"Me, too," he admitted, his voice as shaky as his arms.

"I kind of figured that," she said. She pulled back enough to look at him, and her eyes were starting to twinkle again. "I heard the way you landed on that stool."

"Yeah, well, you were flat on your back. You didn't have to worry about falling on the floor," he pointed out.

They traded smiles, neither of them quite ready to leave the comfort of each other's arms yet.

Finally Lorelai sighed. "Are you in any shape to drive?"

"I'll be fine." He gave her temple one last kiss and made his way around to the driver's side.

He sat in front of the steering wheel for a few moments, thinking what a pleasure it would be to drive and only worry about the traffic, nothing else. He reached over and grasped Lorelai's shoulder, kneading it tenderly. She leaned her cheek against his hand, gently sighing. With one last pat on her shoulder, he fired up the car.

Partway home, he realized that Lorelai was very quiet. Eerily quiet. Very un-Lorelai-like quiet. The sort of quiet that made him tense and nervous. He glanced over at her. It was dark, but he could see that she was staring blankly out of her window, biting her lip.

"Hey." He laid his hand on her knee. "What's going on?"

She closed her eyes and looked down, rubbing her forehead briefly. "Usually I think of these things, you know?"

"What things?"

"Things that can go wrong." Her voice was brittle. "I try to be prepared for any contingency. But this time, I didn't. It never even occurred to me that something could go wrong and I wouldn't have the baby. I thought the baby was a given."

Luke felt his heart speeding up. He was sensing that bad things were coming. "The baby's fine," he stated, trying to cut off whatever apprehension was eating at her.

"But…it could happen, Luke! It could! And I didn't even give that a thought. That was…careless of me. It was something we should have discussed, before the wedding. It could have been part of our agreement."

"Our _agreement_?" He already felt the anger tensing inside of him.

"I'm just saying," she said, oh-so-coolly, "that I wouldn't expect you to stay if I'd lose the baby."

He thought his head might explode. "I suggest," he said, his own voice icy, "that you very carefully choose what you're going to say next."

"It's just…" She stopped, swallowed hard, and tried to go back to sounding unconcerned, but failed. "I want to be fair to you. The agreement was you were marrying me because of the baby. If there's no baby, there's no marriage, right?"

His jaw was clenched so tightly it wouldn't have surprised him to hear it shatter. "Honestly?" he growled. "That's what you think of me? You think I stood there that day with Sondra and said the things I did, and promised you the things I did, and then I'd cut and run as soon as things go wrong? Nice to know how I rate," he told her heatedly.

"No, Luke, that's not…" She shook her head. "I'm just saying I wouldn't expect you to stay."

The Jeep passed under a streetlight and he could see her face, tired and pale and heartsick. And he suddenly realized that this was what she always did. Anytime she thought there was a chance that she'd get hurt she'd try to get herself out in front of it. She'd do the hurting first, if necessary, just to avoid the pain of the unexpected. It all suddenly clicked, and he pulled over, as far off of the roadway as he could get.

He turned on the emergency flashers and sat with his hands dangling over the top of the steering wheel, listening to his heart racing in his chest. He took a deep breath and turned to her.

"Lorelai, if you don't _want_ to be married to me, then that's a conversation we need to have. But I think that the woman I've been waking up with every morning for the last month is happy being married. And I _know_ that I'm happy being married to you."

She started to say something, but he cut her off.

"If something were to happen to the baby…" He trailed off, shaking his head. He cleared his throat, but the words still came out husky. "That's something I can't even talk about. It would be a tragedy that I don't know how we'd get through. But the one thing I _do_ know is that the last thing I'd want after that pain would be to lose you, too."

She drew in a sharp breath. He could see her mouth opening and closing. "But we got married because of the baby." She was still stubbornly trying to argue her point.

He sighed. "The baby was the―what's the word April uses? The precipitate. The baby caused us to get back together and get married. But that doesn't mean the baby is the only thing holding us together, does it? I mean, love counts, right?"

He could see she was blinking back tears now. "You'd want to stay married to me, even if there wasn't a baby?" she quavered.

"Ah, Lorelai." He reached over and pulled her against him, stroking her head. "You are so exasperating! Of course I'd want to stay married to you! I love you! You know that, right?"

"Yes?" Her voice was muffled by his chest, but he could hear the uncertainty.

"Look." He took her by her shoulders and turned her so he could look into her face. "I need you to forget about that guy that was masquerading as me from November on. Can you do that? He was an idiot. You need to remember the guy that used to take care of you, and fixed your house, and carried around a ridiculous horoscope for eight long years. The guy who said he was all in. Do you remember him?"

"Yes," she said softly, the tension leaving her face. "I have a vague recollection. He was cute. Really hot. Never really understood the whole baseball cap thing, though."

He rolled his eyes, but nodded. "Would that guy abandon you?"

"No," she said, awe easing into her voice.

"OK," he exhaled. "Are we clear on that, then?"

She nodded, the smile starting to shine on her face again.

He cleared his throat again, and looked down, fighting his own insecurity.

"Hey." She put her hand on the back of his neck, under the too-long hair starting to curl there. She stroked his skin gently. "What's going on in _your_ head?"

"You never said." He pressed his lips together as his eyes darted around the interior of the car. "_Do_ you want to be married to me?"

"Oh, Luke," she crooned. She undid her seatbelt, throwing herself over into his lap as much as she could in the cramped quarters. She brought his mouth to hers and kissed him long, sweet and deep. "More than you can ever imagine," she whispered against his mouth, after the kiss ended.

He took a calming breath, trying to slow his racing heart. "And we're in this, right? Long-term, no matter what?"

"No matter what," she agreed.

"Then," he sighed with contentment, "let's go home."

They walked through the door, exhausted, Luke's arm still hovering around Lorelai's waist just in case. They both paused without comment as they entered the living room, letting the quiet and the peacefulness of just being home provide some rejuvenation.

Luke swung Lorelai around to him, holding her tightly against him, even as one hand pushed its way in-between them to cup her stomach. He rubbed gently, wishing he could somehow feel those heartbeats that had provided such reassurance back in the clinic tonight.

"Hungry?" he asked.

"Do you have to ask?" she joked, but weakly. He felt her sigh against him. "Actually, I'm so tired I don't know if I am or not, but I bet if you put food in front of me, I'd eat it."

"Then let's go find some food to put in front of you," he agreed, heading them towards the kitchen.

She stopped by the stairs. "I think I'm going to run upstairs first and get cleaned up some, if that's OK. I'm feeling pretty grungy here."

"Sure." Luke had to bite down on his impulse to go with her; to follow her; to make certain he was right there the next time her face went dead-white and she needed him. "I'll go scrounge us up some dinner," he made himself say instead.

He watched while she dragged herself upstairs, disappearing into their bedroom. Then he turned and stumbled over to kneel by the coffee table, where he placed both hands over the head of the carved wooden duck, bowing his head reverently.

* * *

**Notes:** Alex, I'm sure this tension-filled chapter wasn't what you had in mind when you requested it, but I wish you a very happy birthday in any case! Have a happy 23!


	9. Olives and Olive Branches

**Note:** Here's a fun chapter- which we needed after that last one, huh?

* * *

"Hey, Cathy!" Entering Anna's shop, Lorelai called out a greeting to the young woman standing at the cash register.

"Oh, hi, Lorelai," Cathy responded, putting down the sweater set she'd been refolding. "Hang on a minute and I'll go get Anna."

Lorelai started over to look at a display of purses but halfway across the room was suddenly hit with an attack of nerves and doubt. Luke had called her at the Dragonfly barely 45 minutes ago with the news that he was hung up at the diner and imploring her to go pick up April for her weekly visit with them. Lorelai had hopped into the Jeep at once. Now, however, she was having second thoughts. Luke should have called Anna, she thought, and let her know. This unexpected twist could be just the thing to set Anna off again.

Cathy reappeared and motioned for Lorelai to come over. "Anna's in her office," she told her. "Go on back."

"Sure," Lorelai said, trying to sound cheery. She cautiously made her way down a dim hallway lined with boxes to a small office. She peered inside and Anna waved her in.

"OK," she was saying into a phone. "Just get here as soon as you can." She put down the phone and smiled at Lorelai. "April's running late. She's washing the chlorine off and then she'll head on over."

"Oh," Lorelai said, trying not to sound jittery. "I could just go over and pick her up at the house, if that'd be better." The Nardini's lived in small house just two blocks over from the shop.

"Nah, it won't take her long," Anna replied. "Have a seat."

Lorelai gave her a strained smile and sat in the chair facing the desk. Anna got up and came around to the front of the desk, leaning back against it casually, folding her arms as she did her best to smile back. Lorelai recognized what Anna was doing. She did the same thing when people came into her office to put them at ease, to make it seem less like they'd been summoned to the principal's office.

"Listen, I'm sorry that we didn't give you any warning that I was coming over to pick up April today." Lorelai decided that she should just plunge right in and face her insecurity. "Luke had a busload of Baptists suddenly turn up at the diner and he's short two workers today. I could get away from the Inn, so I came over. I hope that's OK."

Anna sighed and looked down with a frown, scuffling her shoes together. "Look, Lorelai, the crazy lady's been put to rest for the time being, OK?" She looked back up at Lorelai with a tentative smile. "I think we can try to just act normal here, and see where that gets us. I understand that life doesn't always go like you've planned. A little deviation is OK."

Lorelai exhaled in relief. "You know what it's like when you're trying to run a business."

"Boy, do I!" Anna agreed.

An uncomfortable pause filled the room while two sets of eyes darted around, trying to think of something to say next, desperately wishing that April would just appear in the doorway ready to go.

"I talked to April," Anna blurted out.

"I should hope so!" Lorelai said quickly, not quite knowing what she meant.

Anna chuckled. "I mean, we sat down and had a really long, serious talk. And you were right. She knew a lot more than I thought she did. She'd observed a lot more than I thought she had. And none of it was in my favor."

"Oh," Lorelai said, suddenly understanding.

"I don't want her to think I'm standing in her way to have a relationship with her father. And with you," Anna added quickly. "She's old enough to have her own opinions, and like it or not, I've got to give her the chance to express them."

Lorelai was nodding vigorously. "I know, right? Here you've given life to the little bugger, and tried to mold her into your image, and she has the nerve to come up with her own ideas! How warped is that?"

Anna laughed. Actually laughed. "She's still talking about getting to visit with Rory. That trip was the highlight of her summer so far."

"Sorry about that," Lorelai acknowledged. "We didn't know it was going to be such a case of hero worship."

"No, it was really good for her," Anna revealed. "You were also right when you said how similar our lives were. April has always had these dreams about her future, but since she's been with Rory she's confident about making plans. Now it's not just dreams. It's helped her tremendously to see Rory's example of what she can accomplish. April's always had a lot of faith in her abilities, but for the first time she has the conviction that she_ can_ have the life she wants. Having Rory as a living, breathing example has been a big boost for her."

"Rory's had some ups and downs." Lorelai felt like she had to caution Anna. "But she's back on track now to reach her goals. We had a bad time last summer, where I really thought I'd lost the girl I knew. But she's back now with a vengeance! But," she leaned forward and whispered, telling secrets, "I still don't really like her boyfriend."

Anna held out her hand. "I don't even want to think about that yet!"

"Yeah, neither does Luke," Lorelai chuckled, "but it'll happen one day. Some floppy-haired charmer will kiss her in the market and…Never mind," she said, quickly, as Anna looked alarmed. She gave out her friendly smile. "We really appreciate you letting her spend so much time with us. You've been very generous." Lorelai wanted Anna to know she was sincere with that sentiment.

"You're welcome. She enjoys Stars Hollow. What festival is it this week?"

Lorelai's eyebrows pulled together, trying to remember. "I think it's some sort of Hawaiian thing. Apparently Stars Hollow has a sister city in Hawaii. Who knew, huh? All I know is that there's a boatload of leis inside Patty's studio. Ha!" Lorelai suddenly cackled. "And if you knew Patty, you'd know there could be several meanings to that!"

Anna nodded, listening carefully. "So why haven't you told her about the baby yet?"

Anna said it so smoothly that it took a few seconds before the words actually sunk into Lorelai's consciousness. Then she gasped while she tried to fumble for a response. "Uh…um, what? I'm sorry, what? What do you mean?" She sat up straighter and tried to tighten up her stomach.

Anna's eyes danced merrily. "Don't worry, you're not showing yet. But you are pregnant, aren't you?"

Lorelai bit at her bottom lip. "Yes," she admitted. "How did you know?"

"When you came to pick her up for the trip to go see Rory, I saw you go over to the display of baby things I had in the window," Anna told her. "I saw you pick up that pink blanket. Maybe it's something only a woman who's been pregnant herself would notice, but there's a difference between picking up a baby thing because it's so cute and cuddly, and picking it up with the idea that you could actually use it."

Lorelai took a deep breath and closed her eyes, nodding in agreement. She opened them and looked at Anna worriedly.

To her surprise, Anna smiled kindly at her. "When are you due?"

A few beats passed before Lorelai decided how to answer. "March," she finally said. She could see Anna considering that. She tensed, waiting for her reply.

"Spring's a nice time to have a baby," was her only comment.

"We…We haven't really told anyone yet," Lorelai said in a rush. "Rory knows, but that's it. We…We had a little scare last week, but we've been to the doctor now, and everything's fine. Actually, we were just to the doctor yesterday. That's one of the reasons why Luke didn't feel right about leaving the diner shorthanded again today."

Anna's eyebrows shot up. "Luke went with you to the doctor?"

"Oh, yeah!" Lorelai laughed. "Luke had a million questions for her! He'd read a couple of the baby books, and he―"

"He read baby books?" Anna's voice turned shrill with incredulity.

"Absolutely," Lorelai said proudly. It suddenly hit her that she sounded like she was bragging, and she remembered all too painfully what it had felt like to hear Sherry carrying on about Chris. "I think it's because he doesn't trust me," she confided, trying to address the issue lightly. "And then, after last week, he was really worried," she added, more seriously.

"You said you had a scare?"

"I really thought it was a miscarriage." Lorelai tried to say that as bravely as possible. "But it wasn't, and everything's fine, but Luke can't get it out of his head. It wouldn't surprise me if he's hired someone to trail me. I fully expect he's got some sort of tracking device on my car!"

They smiled at each other again, and Lorelai looked across the room, nodding briefly. "We'd like to tell April. We just wanted to make sure everything was OK first."

Anna took a deep breath. "You tell her whenever you're ready to."

"Thanks―" Lorelai started to say, just as April burst into the small room.

"Hi, Lorelai!" she said. "Where's Dad?" she asked, looking back down the hallway.

Lorelai's head reared up at once in shock. As far as she knew, April had never called Luke anything besides Luke. She looked at Anna, and saw that her face showed stunned surprise as well.

"He's stuck in the Hollow, making patty melts for a busload of Baptists that rolled in," she said quickly. "Hopefully he'll be able to put on one of his Jimmy Buffet shirts and blend in with everyone else at the festival later on tonight."

April laughed and rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah, he'll love that!" she agreed.

"Well, you'd better get going," Anna suggested, pushing herself away from her desk. Only Lorelai noticed the uncertainty in the way she tucked back her hair and waited for her daughter to run up and give her a quick kiss goodbye.

"Bye, Mom!" April called, already striding towards the door. "My bag's out here," she told Lorelai, disappearing down the hall.

Lorelai nodded at Anna and was starting out herself when she heard Anna call her name again. She poked her head back into the office.

"I made a mistake, didn't I?" Anna asked, a seldom-heard note of doubt in her voice. "About Luke. I was wrong, wasn't I?"

Lorelai felt fear catch in her throat, but then resolve straightened her shoulders. If she had to fight this woman for the man she loved, she would.

Apparently Anna could see what she was thinking. "No," she said, smiling sadly, "I don't mean wrong about the two of us. There was never anything long-term between us at all. I mean," she paused and sighed deeply. "I was wrong about keeping April from him."

Lorelai looked at her with pity. "Yeah," she said, as gently as she could, "you were."

* * *

The 'Taste of the Tropics' Festival was in full-swing. April and Lorelai had already tried pineapple ice cream, guzzled fake pina coladas, purchased silk orchids to wear in their hair, and had taken hula lessons by the time Luke found them out in the square. He put his arm around Lorelai's shoulder, quickly checking to make sure she was feeling OK and not too tired out. He patted April's fly-away hair in greeting.

"Nice flower," he told her with a straight face.

"I don't think orchids actually come in this shade," April explained. "But I'm really into this teal color right now, and Lorelai thought it'd look good on me."

"It does," he agreed, no longer joking. "What's next? Or can we just go home?" he asked hopefully.

"April!"

They all three turned and saw Sarah Rust, the 12-year-old daughter of the man who ran the copy center. She'd befriended April last week in the bookstore when they were both looking at insect books.

"There's a fortune teller here again!" Sarah told April excitedly.

"Can I go?" April asked at once. "I have a theory I want to test out."

"Sure," Luke said. "Maybe you can convince your Aunt Liz it's a racket." He handed April some money and they watched the two girls run across the square.

Lorelai instantly turned to Luke, bouncing excitedly. She started tugging him off to the side, away from the crowd of people.

"I have a surprise for you!" she whispered to him, excitement and nerves making her voice husky.

"Lorelai, honestly!" he growled at her. "I guess I should be flattered, but come on! April's here, and we're in the middle of a damn town festival!"

"No!" she laughed. "And seriously, Luke, do you think I'd really try to…" her voice faded out. "Oh. Well, I guess I have tried to get you to do some pretty outrageous stuff from time to time. But that's not the surprise today!"

"What's going on?" he asked, suspicion and worry fighting for top honors.

"Well, to start with, Anna knows." She surreptitiously placed a hand on her stomach, giving him a significant look.

He understood at once. "You're kidding! How?"

"Apparently I have a tell when I look at baby things."

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Never mind," she said quickly, aware that they could be interrupted at any time. "Anyway, she figured it out and she's fine with it, and she says we can tell April whenever we want to."

"Phew!" Luke breathed out in relief. "I never expected that."

Lorelai nodded vigorously. "And there's something else."

He quirked an eyebrow at her. "Well, go on."

Suddenly she was shy about revealing it, frightened that either it would mean too much to him, or not enough. Maybe it wasn't her place to tell him at all.

"Lorelai," he prodded, loosing patience.

"OK," she said quickly, making up her mind. "April called you 'Dad' today."

He didn't say anything for a long time. She began to think he hadn't heard her at all.

"What do you mean?" he finally asked, gruffly.

"I mean she burst into the room, looked around for you, and said, 'Where's Dad?'" Lorelai explained. Again she waited for his response. "Has she…Has she called you that before?" she asked, when at long last he hadn't said anything.

She watched his jaw tense. "No," he said shortly. He turned from her, looking back out over the square, his hands on his hips.

"Hey," she said gently, softly stroking his arm.

He turned on her quickly, and she could see the emotion struggling in him then. "Are you sure that's what she said?"

She looked him in the eye. "Yes," she said clearly. "It just sort of popped out of her, like she wasn't even aware of what she said. But Anna and I both heard it."

She continued rubbing his arm and suddenly she felt the tension flow out of him. He leaned over against her.

"This is good, right?" he mumbled against her hair, letting her support more of his weight for a moment.

"This is really good," she agreed, staunchly holding him up.

"OK," he sighed, "that's what I thought."

* * *

The pancakes were rapidly cooling on their plates the next morning at breakfast. They were waiting for April to digest the news they'd just given her. She was staring at the syrup bottle while her brain assembled the facts.

"So that means you were already pregnant when you got married," she said thoughtfully, doing the math.

Luke and Lorelai's eyes met across the table.

"Yes," Lorelai answered truthfully, but not without a sigh.

April nodded. "Is that why you got married?"

Luke watched Lorelai's face pucker with pain and he jumped in to save her the explanation. "You know Lorelai and I were mad at each other," he told the girl. "We thought we shouldn't be together. But then the baby happened and it forced us to make up, and that's been a really good thing. If it wasn't for that, it might have taken us a really long time to realize that we need to be together."

"Are you happy about the baby?" she asked then, still trying to figure out the adults' emotions.

"We're really happy about the baby," Lorelai confirmed.

April nodded again, but she put her head down, staring at her hands clasped in her lap. Lorelai and Luke traded worried looks.

"April, sweetie," Lorelai started. "Can you tell us what's bothering you?"

April shrugged, still looking down. "I know kids this has happened to. They get a new brother or sister and they get pushed to the side while everyone oohs and aahs over the baby. I just kinda got used to being here."

"That's not gonna happen," Luke said firmly at the same time Lorelai reached for April's face, tilting it up so she could look into it.

"If you think you're getting out of babysitting, forget it," Lorelai told her seriously, while a smile danced over her mouth.

April smiled shyly. "You'd let me babysit?"

Lorelai scoffed. "Are you kidding? It will be expected!"

"I'd better take one of those classes they're always offering at the Y," April mused. "I've never really wanted to before, but I'll want to be prepared."

"That's a good idea," Lorelai agreed. "Maybe your dad better take it with you," she added, winking at Luke.

"Ha ha," he replied, rolling his eyes.

"So what does Rory think?" April asked anxiously.

Luke and Lorelai smiled at each other. This question they'd anticipated.

"Rory thinks it's great," Luke said.

"Good," April muttered in relief. Once again she stared at the syrup bottle. "So will you have to get those ultrasound tests, where you can see the baby moving and his heart beating and everything?"

"Yep," Lorelai confirmed.

"Can I come?" April asked eagerly. "I'd love to see how they do that! I've read about the procedure, but I can't picture how it really works. Do you think I could come and watch?"

"Well, we'd probably have to clear that with your mom, but…" Lorelai looked at Luke, making a 'what the hell do I say here?' face, but he looked back at her blankly and shrugged. "Sure. Why not?" she said, smiling gamely at the girl.

"Cool." April thought for a few more moments before she attacked her pancakes. "You know," she said, her voice a little muffled from the big bite she'd shoveled in, "I'd just gotten used to the fact that I've _got_ a big sister. And now I'm going to _be_ a big sister, too! That's kinda awesome!"

"Pretty awesome," Lorelai agreed, smiling happily at Luke. She licked some syrup off of her thumb and then dove into her pancakes, too.

* * *

Luke was grateful he'd read the baby books and had asked so many questions at the doctor's, because April was full of questions of her own as he drove her back to Woodbridge a little later that morning. Still, he found himself answering more and more with "Ask your mother" or "Ask Lorelai."

At last he turned down the street housing the swimming pool and April spotted Chelsea just getting out of her mom's car. "Just let me out here," she urged, her hand already on the door handle. "Hey, it's OK if I tell people, right?"

"Sure," Luke agreed, pulling the truck over to the curb.

"OK." April jumped out, slinging her small duffel bag across her shoulder. "Bye, Dad," she said, already turning away to run and catch up with her friend. "See you later!"

Luke stared out the windshield, watching April and her friend talk with great animation as they rushed inside the building. He ran his hands over the steering wheel, hearing the words in his head again. Then he reached into his pocket for his phone, so he could share the unbelievable thing that had just happened with Lorelai.

* * *

That evening, while he was driving the Jeep, Lorelai reached over for the sixth time to straighten his tie and Luke batted her hand away with more force than he meant to.

"Ow," she complained, rubbing her fingers.

"Sorry," he apologized, reaching over to grab her hand and soothe it with his. "But the outcome of this night isn't going to hinge on whether or not my tie is straight."

"I know," Lorelai agreed. "I'm just really nervous."

"Me, too." He turned down the Gilmore's street and he could feel Lorelai's hand clench under his. "It'll be all right," he attempted to reassure her.

"No, it won't," she muttered. She pulled her hand away and sat up straight as they turned into the driveway. She spied a Prius parked there.

"Rory!" she cried out in delight. She turned to Luke and regarded his smug smile. "Did you know she was going to be here?" she playfully demanded.

"Maybe," he grinned. "There might have been a couple of calls."

She smiled broader. "Did you plan this?"

He shrugged, happy to see her pleased. "I just figured having her here tonight wouldn't hurt. At least we'll have one person on our side."

He accepted Lorelai's quick kiss of thanks while they hurried towards the door.

"Where's my kid?" Lorelai demanded loudly, as soon as they maid opened the door. She rushed in, gasping out "Offspring? Offspring? Where are you?" dramatically.

Rory hurried into the entryway, laughing, her arms outstretched. "Mama!" she cried out.

The two met in a fierce hug, giggling at themselves.

"Honestly, Lorelai, you'd think you hadn't seen her in a month," Emily chastised them. "Which is the truth about your own mother, by the way."

"Hi Mom," Lorelai smiled, her arm still around Rory.

Richard appeared, offering his hand to Luke in greeting. "Come in, come in," he urged.

Luke followed Richard over to the drink cart while the ladies entered more leisurely.

"How was the trip?" Lorelai asked her mother.

"It was fabulous," Emily declared. "I'm so glad we decided to explore America first this summer. There are so many breathtaking things to see out West. The train trip up the coast was incredible. We're really considering an Alaskan cruise next year," she added, reaching for a photo album to show the girls.

Lorelai arched an eyebrow at Luke when her mother mentioned the cruise. The thought of Nicole no longer made her cringe. He glared back at her, which made her grin.

"So, Luke, everything running smoothly with the diner?" Richard asked, pouring an imported ale into a frosted mug for him.

"Pretty good," Luke replied, taking the drink with a nod of thanks. "A couple of my staff were off doing a concert with their band this week, so I ended up working some extra hours. But the summer's always pretty profitable. I hate all of the stupid festivals our town selectman dreams up, but they do pull in the tourists."

"Good, good," Richard said jovially.

Luke looked over at the girls at that moment, and the sight of their dark heads resting against each other while they looked at Emily's trip pictures made him swallow hard. Suddenly he was back to the day they buried Paul Anka with silent, sad Lorelai, and he was still locked in his own prison of pain. He didn't know it had registered on his face until Lorelai excused herself and came to his side.

"Hey, Babe," she said privately to him. "You OK?"

Her loving voice jolted him back to the present. "Fine," he said, still not able to smile convincingly. His fingers kneaded into her shoulder because he desperately needed to feel connected to her for a moment.

"Lorelai!" Richard boomed out, having seen Luke's distress and wanting to help smooth it over. "What can I get you to drink tonight?"

Lorelai shot Luke a look and drew in a sharp breath. They'd discussed possible scenarios, and this had been the most obvious one. She was on.

"Well, Dad," she said, trying to sound like her usual bright self in spite of her nerves, "what can you make me without any actual booze in it?"

Richard looked confused. "You don't want any alcohol?"

"No." Lorelai took another deep breath and let it out. "In fact, you can skip the alcohol for me for the next nine months." She waited a few beats, letting her words sink in. No one spoke. "Because," she added, sounding a little panicked, "what takes nine months, huh?"

The silence stretched out. Richard stared at her, one hand clutching a martini glass and the other stopped in the middle of his reach for the ice bucket.

Emily's voice shattered the quiet. "Lorelai, have you lost your mind?" She took several steps across the room. "Are you determined to never learn from your previous mistakes? You break up, you marry without thought, and now you choose this way to inform us you're pregnant? Pregnant!" She whirled more towards Richard, fuming, then turned again towards Lorelai when her husband didn't respond. "What would possess you to get pregnant this quickly after getting together again?"

"Mom." Lorelai tried to temper her reaction, squeezing her eyes shut against Emily's indignation.

"Wait!" Emily gasped. "When's the baby due?" she asked suspiciously.

Lorelai pressed her lips together, then nodded. They'd discussed this, too, but she wasn't sure until this moment what she was going to answer. "March," she said, a touch of defiance in her tone.

"March!" Emily cried. "I should have known! 22 years and you still haven't learned your lesson! Honestly, Lorelai, is birth control really that hard?"

"Emily!" Richard huffed, trying to set the glass back down.

Emily drew her shoulders back and her face hardened as another dreadful thought flashed through her mental calculations. "This is why you got married!" she speculated. "You were already pregnant!" Her hand swept disdainfully at Luke. "Is it even his?"

"Grandma! That's enough!" Rory cried out sharply, starting across the room.

"Emily!" Richard said warningly again, as his hand fumbled on the drink cart, sending the ice bucket crashing to the floor. Ice cubes bounced and cracked against the hard surface.

"That's it!" Luke's voice roared over everything. He sat his drink down forcefully and put his arm protectively around Lorelai. "I will not stand here any longer and let you―What was that word you used, years ago? Eviscerate," he recalled. "I will not let you eviscerate my wife and insult me and try to imply that this baby is any sort of a mistake." He glared at both Richard and Emily. "Do you have any idea the number of times she stumbled into the diner after one of these dinners and I had to put her back together with coffee and chili fries? Well, no more! This is it! I'm done trying to make you people into a real family! If this is the way you treat each other, I'm glad you don't want me to be a part if it!" He started to hustle Lorelai towards the door.

"Luke, wait!" Richard hopped over the melting ice and rushed to stop them. He put a hand onto each of their arms. "Please, please wait. Please, let's try to discuss this calmly," he implored.

"How?" Lorelai asked him, sounding distressed, and Luke's arm tightened around her even more. "How could we possibly discuss this?"

"Emily," he said then, rushing over to stand in front of his proud wife. "Emily, I do not believe you are seeing the big picture here."

"And what would that be, Richard?" she sneered, tossing her head.

He reached out and grabbed her arm, trying to make her see. "_We_ are going to have another grandchild," he stressed. "And if Luke and Lorelai permit it, we can have another chance at being around while this child grows up. I, for one, would cherish that opportunity." His voice turned softer. "Wouldn't you like that, Emily?"

She blinked. The rigid lines of her face slackened as his implication registered. "I…" she started.

"Doesn't matter." Luke's voice was harsh. "There's nothing you can say tonight that will convince me to let Lorelai stay here and listen to you people anymore. We're going home. If you ever want to try the family thing again, you know where to find us." His arms wrapped around a stunned Lorelai and he whisked her towards the door.

Rory quickly grabbed her purse and followed them.

"Rory, please," Richard pleaded with her.

"No, Grandpa, I'm going home, too," she informed them, digging her car keys out and rushing to the door. She stopped for just a moment and looked back, tossing her own head the way she'd seen her mother and grandmother do so many times over the years. "This baby is my sister or brother," she said, shaking her head sadly at them. "Don't you understand that?" Her voice cracked and she ran for the door.

Outside, Luke was just closing the door on Lorelai's side of the car.

"I'll follow you home," Rory called to him, sprinting over to her Prius.

He nodded and rushed to get in the car himself, never wanting to get away from anything as badly as he did this stern, unforgiving house. He fired up the Jeep and took a moment to look over at Lorelai, who was staring blankly at the glove box, still breathing erratically.

"You gonna be OK?" he asked with real concern, rubbing her leg.

"Sure," she said dully. "I'm fine." She roused herself enough to give him a shaky smile.

He roared out of the driveway, checking to make sure Rory was behind them. The things he'd said and the words they'd said and the awful, barbed feelings from the encounter chased around his head. He kept looking nervously over at Lorelai, who was still sitting as though anchored in cement.

Partway to Stars Hollow, he heard her make a noise. He looked over at her fearfully, afraid that she was crying. He might have just made this whole mess with her parents a thousand times worse than it had been.

"We'll fix this," he promised her. "I'll fix this. I'm not sure how, but…"

Lorelai erupted in the laughter she'd been trying to smother for the last five miles, rocking sideways and wiping the tears escaping down her cheeks.

"What?" he asked, instantly suspicious, although relieved to see her laughing.

Another peal of laughter rolled out of her. "Oh! _You!_" She fought against the giggles popping out of her. "Coffee and chili fries!" She gulped in some air, sighing with contented exhaustion. "You put me back together with coffee and chili fries," she said weakly, so much tenderness evident in her voice. "You left out the pie," she pointed out, fondly.

"Well…" he glanced at the mirrors, "they didn't need to know all the details."

She sighed again, leaning her face over to nuzzle against his arm. "I love you so much."

He closed his eyes in relief, popping them open the next second in a panic, realizing that he was driving. "I love you too," he murmured, managing to keep his eyes on the road as he dropped a quick kiss to the top of her head.

"So we didn't have dinner," she pointed out a few quiet miles later, still nestled against his arm.

"No, we didn't," he agreed. "We can either go home and see what's in the kitchen, or we can stop at your favorite taco place at the next intersection."

"I'll call Rory," Lorelai said at once, grabbing for the phone in her purse, "and let her know it's taco time!"

* * *

The mental fallout from the confrontation at the Gilmore's caused Saturday to drag for all of them. Lorelai pleaded a headache and came home early from the Dragonfly, changing into flannel drawstring pajama bottoms and a t-shirt. She collapsed on the couch, deciding to watch home improvement shows. Or maybe to just nap while pretending to watch neighbors redo each other's homes. Rory watched with her for a while and then moved off to her room to read. Even Luke ditched the diner around 7 P.M., leaving Caesar and a couple of new kids he'd just hired to close up on their own.

"Scoot," he told her, standing in front of the couch.

She made a noise of protest and lifted her upper body enough that he could sit down. As soon as he landed on the cushions with a groan of approval she draped herself over him.

"Hang on," he told her, leaning over to unlace his boots and kick them off. "That's better," he sighed, resting his head on the back of the couch, his arm trailing over her hip.

"Um," she sighed contentedly, snuggling against him.

"Feeling OK?" he mumbled, keeping his eyes closed.

"Uh huh."

He cracked one eye opened and raised his head enough to peer at the TV. "What'cha watchin'?"

"Don't know," she muttered back. "I think Ty's fixing somebody's house."

He stared at the screen for a few seconds longer before his head crashed back against the upholstery again. "Good," he sighed.

They had both nearly fallen asleep when the doorbell made them jump.

"Who's that?" Luke asked suspiciously.

"Don't know," Lorelai sighed, dragging herself off to the foyer.

She pulled open the door and instantly went to high alert status. "Mom! Dad!" She pushed a hand through her wild hair. "What are you doing here?"

They all heard the thud of Luke's feet hitting the floor. His stern face quickly appeared around the corner. His arm went around Lorelai's waist as he pulled her back about a foot, leaving room for him to get between her and her parents. "That's a great question. What_ are_ you doing here?" he asked coldly.

Richard turned his palms up in supplication. "Luke, you said if we ever wanted to try 'the family thing' again, we knew where to find you. Well, we certainly do want to try. We're here to apologize, and to ask that you please give us another chance. Please let us have a chance to rectify this."

Lorelai blinked at her father, who for once was not dressed in a suit. His casual pants and a golf shirt made it seem like this was truly an informal visit. Her eyes switched to her mother, who was also dressed down in a relaxed summer pants suit.

All eyes moved to Emily, in fact. She bristled, as though feeling unfairly judged.

"Emily," Richard prodded gently.

She sighed and her shoulders lost their rigid posture. "Lorelai, I'm well-aware that we both try to deny that we are in any way alike. However, we both let words fly out of our mouths indiscriminately. What I said last night was mean-spirited and thoughtless. Since you know what it's like to have said words you regret, I'm hoping that you can find it within yourself to forgive me for them."

All eyes shifted to Lorelai, whose mouth had dropped open in shock. She glanced at Luke.

"Um, sure, Mom," she said, hesitating. "I do know what it feels like to sting people with words. I know what it feels like to regret them later." She cleared her throat. "Uh, why don't you come on in?" she offered, half-heartedly.

Luke shot her a questioning look, but stepped back, welcoming Richard and Emily into their home.

"Sorry it's a mess," Lorelai apologized, quickly grabbing up some debris. "We all just sort of crashed tonight."

"Oh, you have a duck, too," Emily pointed out, sitting down primly in the easy chair.

"Yep, this is Desmond," Lorelai said in introduction, patting his head fondly as she fell back onto the couch. "I noticed the one we brought you wasn't out last night," she observed archly.

"Oh! Well, we just haven't found the right spot for it yet," Emily replied, a little flustered. "I thought perhaps it'd go in your father's study."

Richard regarded Emily with raised eyebrows. "Is that right?" he asked, sounding contemplative.

An awkward pause fell.

Lorelai turned her head. "Rory!" she yelled. "Your grandparents are here! Come join us!"

"Ha! Good one, Mom!" They heard Rory call from back in her room. In another second she appeared in the doorway, chuckling. "Like there's any way they'd be—" She choked off her comment as her wide eyes informed her of their actual presence. "Oh, uh, Grandma! Grandpa! You're here!" She gave Luke a beseeching look as she went to perch on the arm of the couch beside him.

"Rory," Richard greeted her. He leaned a little further forward on his chair, nodding towards her. "We're here to make up for last night. We regret what happened. We want you to know that we do indeed know that it's your little sister or brother that's on the way. We want to be included in that."

Rory's eyes gleamed at her grandfather. She nodded happily at him. Then a frown marred her face. "Grandma?" she asked, her head tilted distrustfully, swinging her head to study her.

Emily looked down as her fingers creased a line down her slacks. "That goes for me, too, Rory," she said at last. Her chin rose up automatically. "It's not easy for me to admit my faults." She cleared her throat. "But I recognize that I was out of line last night. I don't pretend to understand how your mother lives her life, but it's her life, and if she's happy with it…" She trailed off, closing her eyes tightly. "I'll do my best not to interfere," she sighed, resigned.

"Oh!" Rory's eyes were big and round as she looked questioningly at her mother and Luke. "Well, OK, then."

Another awkward pause silenced the room.

"So, tell me, Lorelai, how are you feeling?" Emily asked dutifully.

"Pretty good," Lorelai twisted her hand from side-to-side as she smiled ruefully at her mother. "I've had a little morning sickness. And I'm really tired, you know. But otherwise I've been good."

Luke suddenly sat up, clasping his hand over Lorelai's knee, his face grim. "We thought we'd lost the baby last week," he announced, his voice thick with barely-repressed anger.

"Luke!" Lorelai protested.

"No!" he hissed back at her, his eyes raking over Richard and Emily. "I want them to know this isn't something we're just playing at. I want them to understand what we've been through. I want them to realize that we _chose_ to share our good news with them last night; that it wasn't just some casual piece of gossip!"

Emily grasped the arms of her chair with sudden worry and pulled herself upright. "But you're all right now, Lorelai? Have you seen the doctor? You're sure the baby's OK?"

"Everything's really fine, Mom," Lorelai reassured her, patting Luke's tense leg at the same time. "The doctor gave both of us the thumbs up!"

"Who's your doctor?" Emily demanded. "Are you sure he's reputable? Have you checked his credentials? I'm sure I could call Elizabeth Whitson—she's on the board at Hartford Memorial—and find you a top-notch…" She let her voice trail off as everyone turned their warning gazes on her. She blinked. Eased herself back into her chair. "That is, if you ever need to look for another doctor, I'm sure I could find some recommendations for you."

Lorelai smiled, satisfied. "I'll let you know. Thanks, Mom."

Richard cleared his throat. "Speaking of the baby, there's something we'd like to propose."

"Uh-oh," Lorelai murmured, for Luke's ears. "I knew there was a catch."

"And please, this is just merely an observation on our part," Richard added. "We are not trying in any way to tell you how to arrange your life. We were simply speculating on where you could fit a baby into this house. Have you given that any thought?"

Luke and Lorelai looked at each other. Luke rubbed at his cheek and gave a small shrug before turning to Richard. "We actually discussed it some when we were remodeling the upstairs before. There's a lot of unfinished space up there that's just been used as storage. We went as far as having our contractor draw up some plans, but we decided to just enlarge the bedroom and bathroom up there at that time. We really haven't talked about it any more since then."

"You can just use my room," Rory offered at once.

"No!" Lorelai protested immediately.

"Mom," Rory pointed out, cautiously, "I'm not going to be here for much longer. It'd be fine to change my room into a nursery."

"No!" Lorelai said again, her stubbornness plainly written across her face. "It's your room. It's always gonna be your room! Come on, Rory! Where's your sense of sibling rivalry, huh? You can't just give away your room!"

Luke shook his head at Rory. "We'll come up with some other solution than that," he said firmly.

"And your daughter stays here from time to time as well, correct?" Richard speculated.

"Yeah, April's here about once a week," Lorelai confirmed, wondering if that admission would spark another confrontation with her mother.

"Where does she stay when she's here?" Richard asked.

"She uses my room," Rory said.

"More like she sleeps inside the Rory shrine," Lorelai added.

"What?" Emily asked.

"Nothing," Rory insisted.

Lorelai grinned. "April's a little obsessed with Rory."

"In any case," Richard broke in to get them all back on track, "I think it's obvious you could use some more room here. You need something for the baby and something for April as well."

"We don't want to move," Lorelai said quickly. "We love this house, and it only takes each of us a few minutes to get to work. We really want to stay here."

"We understand that," Richard said gravely. "That's why we're proposing that we fund your upstairs expansion."

"What?" Lorelai was dumbfounded.

Luke was already shaking his head. "That's very generous of you, but—"

Richard cut him off. "Luke, normally my inclination would be to go out and buy some sort of investment in the baby's name. That would usually be my way of showing my excitement at becoming a grandfather again. But we're trying hard here to fit into your lives. We want to do something that would actually benefit you. You say you love this house and you want to stay here. Well, then let us help you get the house ready for the baby. Let us show you that we're pleased that a baby is coming into our lives." Richard stopped for a moment and frankly looked at Luke. "Please let us take part in this. Please let us share in the preparation. We would be very grateful if you'd allow us that."

Luke shut his mouth and stared appraisingly back at Richard. Then he turned and looked at Lorelai, who widened her eyes at him and barely shrugged her shoulders in uncertainty.

"We're going to need to discuss this further," he said then, facing the Gilmores again. "But if we do agree to this, and that's a big 'if,' we're going to have to have some strict guidelines. I mean, we'll want to use our plans, and our contractor. We don't want something over-the-top. We want two bedrooms and another bathroom, period. We don't want to redo the whole house, and we want whatever we do to fit in with everything else."

"Of course," Richard said at once. "You discuss it, and get back with us. I'm sure we can come to terms."

Lorelai bit her lip. "And I'm decorating it, Mom. Not you."

"Of course," Emily managed to say, although it looked like it pained her. "Am I at least permitted to show you some ideas?"

Lorelai playfully tapped her finger against her lips. "Hmmm. I don't know. Maybe we can write up an addendum to our agreement about that."

"Honestly, Lorelai," Emily moaned.

"Why don't I see if I can find us something to snack on?" Luke got up from the sofa. "I'm pretty sure there's some cheese and crackers." He gave a sharp look to both his wife and stepdaughter, who quickly nodded their heads, indicating that they hadn't eaten it all. "I'll just be a minute," he added, heading for the kitchen.

Once in the kitchen he put his face in his hands, breathing hard, listening to the pleasant buzz of conversation sneaking in from the living room. He crossed over to the refrigerator, staring for a moment at the reminder card for Lorelai's next doctor's appointment.

"What a difference a day makes, huh?" he muttered to himself, yanking open the door and starting to search for the cheddar cheese. He hand brushed up against a container of olives, and he pulled them out, too.

_They offered us an olive branch_, he thought with a smirk._ I might as well offer them olives._

* * *

Sunday afternoon was not proving to be a busy time at the diner. It was so slow in fact, that Luke left Brian, who'd just returned from Hep Alien's out-of-town gig, in charge with the instructions to call him at home should anyone show up who actually wanted cooked food. Then he sprinted towards the house to spend an hour or so with Lorelai and Rory.

As he cut across the yard he noticed the strange but yet oddly familiar car parked out front. Frowning, he hurried up the stairs and opened the front door.

He heard Lorelai's laughter pealing out immediately, joining a deep female chuckle that he felt he should know, but didn't. Cautiously he poked his head around the corner.

Lorelai and Anna were sitting on the couch together, several shoebox-sized containers between them. They were holding pictures in their hands and looking quite companionable while they continued to chuckle. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up.

"Oh, Luke!" Lorelai looked up and saw him. "Anna stopped by," she told him, stating the obvious.

"Hi, Luke," Anna said soberly.

He merely nodded a greeting.

"She brought us something!" Lorelai announced gaily. "Something for the baby!" She motioned to a large box on the coffee table.

He picked it up, relieved to have something to occupy him. "What is it?" he asked, staring intently at the face of the happy baby on the package.

"It's a Johnny Jump-Up," Anna said. "Well, at least that's what it was called a long time ago. I'm not sure what this one goes by. But April loved it when she was little. I don't know what I would have done without it. It guaranteed I had enough time to make dinner and run a load of laundry every night."

Luke nodded as he skimmed through the instructions. "What does it do?"

"It attaches to a doorframe and then the baby can bounce up and down. It's great exercise for them; keeps 'em happy. And like I said, April loved it. I saw it as I was shopping around today and thought you might need it, once the baby's here," Anna explained.

Luke's head jerked up. "Is that safe?" he frowned.

"They've been around for a lot of years," Lorelai jumped in, smoothing things over. "I'm sure they wouldn't still be on the market if there'd been any problems. Rory never had one because I couldn't very well ask Mia to install one at the Independence, and the doorways in the potting shed weren't tall enough."

Anna gave her a strange look.

"I'll fill you in someday," Lorelai promised.

"Oh." Luke cleared his throat, totally ill-at-ease. "Well, thanks."

"You're welcome." Anna's voice was polite and stiff.

Lorelai flung herself into the breech once again. "And she brought me the tell-tale blanket, too!" She held up an impossibly tiny, fuzzy pink blanket, rubbing it against her cheek.

"What?" Luke asked.

Lorelai smiled at him gently. "This was the blanket that blabbed I was pregnant."

"Oh," Luke said again. He put the box back on the table and jammed his hands into his pockets. "Where's April?" he questioned.

"She went with Chelsea and her parents to the Boston Aquarium," Anna said.

"That's right. I remember now," Luke muttered. He looked desperately at Lorelai.

Lorelai tilted her head back at him, seemingly telling him to be patient. To his surprise, she then turned towards Anna, giving her a look of encouragement. "Go on," she urged her, softly.

Anna clenched her fists and sighed deeply. "This isn't easy," she said to the room at large. She took a moment, staring at her hands.

Finally she looked at Luke. "I cheated you," she said simply. "I didn't realize how much until just recently. I know you won't believe me, but I wasn't trying to hurt you by keeping April from you. I honestly thought I was doing you a favor."

"A favor!" Luke burst out, incensed.

"Wait," Lorelai cautioned him.

Anna squeezed her eyes shut a moment. "Luke, try to remember back to when we were together. Be honest. We had some good times, but it wasn't anything deeper than that. After we broke up, did you ever even think about looking me up again?"

Luke looked down at the toe of his boot, trying to regulate his breathing and his anger. "No," he finally acknowledged.

"And I wasn't pining after you, either," Anna told him. "You didn't want me and I was looking for something more than you," she said bluntly. "When I found out I was pregnant, it was a shock to discover how much I wanted a baby. I knew you didn't, and I was willing to take on the responsibility of it. I didn't see any reason to bother you about it. It was my decision; not yours. I didn't want you to feel obligated towards me or to April. You have to believe me when I say that I was convinced I was doing you a favor by not involving you." Anna's eyes sought his from her seat on the couch.

Luke clenched and unclenched the muscle in his jaw as he tried to make his voice work. "It wasn't fair," he finally told her, the torment he was feeling obvious in his tone.

"No, it wasn't," she agreed sadly. "I made a huge mistake. I cheated you, Luke. I know there's nothing I can do to make it up to you. I just hope that someday you can believe me when I tell you how sorry I am."

"I can't…" He looked off across the room. "I can't do that yet."

"I know," Anna agreed immediately. "I don't expect you to. But I'm going to do my best to make sure you have time with April now. I know it doesn't take away what I cost you, but unfortunately, it's all I've got to offer."

Luke nodded and looked at Lorelai. She was smiling gently at him, her eyes warm with love and understanding for him. She then looked at Anna.

"And there's something else," she delicately reminded her.

"Oh, yeah." Anna pointed at one of the boxes. "I went through a lot of April's pictures and made copies. I know it's not much, but…" Her voice lost steam, unable to convey the apology she wished.

"There's one here where she's baking a cake," Lorelai said brightly, waving the picture at him. "I'm afraid she doesn't have your diner gene, Babe."

He smiled faintly, crossing his arms over his chest.

Lorelai looked at him challengingly and shuffled herself a little closer to Anna on the couch. She patted the spot next to her invitingly. "Come see," she said, her voice filled with encouragement.

"So how old was she here?" Lorelai asked, sharing the photo with Anna.

Anna stopped looking guilty and smiled at the picture of her little girl. "She was about 7. She was fascinated with Alton Brown at that time. She loved to listen to his scientific explanations about what makes food cook the way it does…"

Slowly, Luke made his way to the couch and settled down beside Lorelai. He leaned over her shoulder and she moved the picture so he could see it, too. He studied a 7-year-old April, noticing how much her facial expression in the picture looked just like his mother. He listened to Lorelai asking questions, and he listened to Anna eagerly supplying the answers. And somehow he knew that if he just trusted Lorelai she'd guide him through this hurt and anger to a place where he could enjoy the present without agonizing over the past he'd missed.

Carefully he leaned closer to her under the guise of studying the picture. He rubbed her shoulder the littlest bit. She turned to him, her eyes bright and happy. He smiled at her; gave her _her_ smile, hoping she knew what he was trying to tell her. She smiled even brighter and gave him her endearingly awkward wink. He leaned against her, now able to enjoy what had turned into a special moment.

Sometimes life was pretty good. And this was one of those times.


	10. Life

**Notes:** Here are some highlights from the newlyweds' life from August through Thanksgiving. (Also, in this 'verse, only Lorelai is pregnant. Sookie, Liz, and Lane are not.)

* * *

**August 15, 2006**

The bird's shiny glass eyes were staring at her.

Lorelai could feel them piercing through her brain. She cleared her throat, slyly glanced up over the trade magazine she was reading, and locked eyes with the raven perched on a shelf over by the window. Eventually her shoulders relaxed and she blinked. She'd learned long ago that Rasputin was always going to win a staring contest.

Luke had a fit when he learned she'd put the raven in her office. Rory had tried to logically talk her out of it. Sookie had shrieked the first 17 times she'd walked in and forgot it was there. Michel always carried something in his hand to block it from his sight when he needed to come into her office. The consensus seemed to be that the stuffed bird was creepy and disturbing, but she liked him all the same.

He had been a gift from the Poes to commend her for a job well-done. As much as the memories from the night of the fire still made her shiver with dread, she was proud of the way she'd handled that emergency. And that was what Rasputin meant to her. On the days when she felt like she'd done everything wrong she could look over to where he was perched on his shelf and remember the one time she did everything right.

Well, almost everything. She felt her lips tugging up into a grin. In retrospect, she should've never let Luke snore away on that couch all by his lonesome. His old bed was tiny, but she suspected they could've made it work. They could've locked Jess up in the closet. And Nicole…

_There wouldn't have been a Nicole after that_, Lorelai thought victoriously, flinging her head back in imagined triumph.

Her stomach growled and she instantly looked at the clock. Almost on cue, knuckles rapped on her door.

"Oh, who could it be?" she drawled, in her Scarlett O'Hara voice, quickly sprinting over to the door to open it. "I do hope it's not any of those nasty soldiers that are eatin' me out of house and home!" She swept open the door, eying the tray Sookie was balancing in hungry appreciation even as she dramatically threw an arm across her forehead. "As God as my witness, I'll never be hungry again!"

Sookie giggled and brought the tray over to her desk. "Hate to break this to you Scarlett, but you're always hungry!"

"Boy, that's the truth," Lorelai agreed happily, plopping back down into her chair. She eagerly reached for a still-warm slice of homemade bread, liberally smeared with Sookie's fresh peach preserves. Her eyes gobbled up the sight of blueberries filling up a pretty china teacup along with a tempting glass of ice-cold milk. "Yum," she hummed in approval, relishing the sweet peach flavor serenading her mouth.

"The peaches this year are phenomenal," Sookie agreed, attacking a peach-smeared slice of her own. She licked her lips, nodding. "Jackson says he can't ever remember a year like this."

"We need to build a root cellar," Lorelai concluded, still chewing ecstatically. "You need to make lots and lots of this so we'll have plenty for over the winter."

Sookie licked some preserves off her thumb. "We've got peach pie for tonight."

Lorelai stopped chewing. "With vanilla ice cream?"

"Uh huh," Sookie confirmed. "Being churned as we speak."

Lorelai's eyes grew wider. She glanced over at the clock. "Maybe I'll just stay here for dinner tonight."

Sookie threw back her head and laughed. "Yeah. That'd really get me in Luke's good graces!"

"Well, he could always come over and join us," Lorelai shrugged, smiling.

The two ladies plundered the items on the tray in silence for a few minutes.

"You know, Sook, this afternoon tea idea of yours is pure gold," Lorelai commended her, wiping up a spot of preserves left on the plate.

Sookie nodded, trying to corral some escaped blueberries tumbling towards the edge of the desk. "It seemed like a good way to keep my eye on you."

Lorelai's infectious laugh bubbled out past the mouthful of bread. "You have to keep your eye on me?" she questioned. "Am I that unpredictable?"

Sookie frowned at a spot of jam now gracing her chef's smock. She scrubbed at it with a napkin. "Well, you know," she murmured, concentrating on the stain instead of what her friend had said, "Luke asked me to, and this seemed like a good way to make sure I saw you in the afternoon."

Lorelai felt the blood in her veins nearly slow to a stop. The bread that had been manna from heaven just a few seconds ago turned to sawdust in her mouth and she had to force herself to swallow. She laid down the slice she'd been eating and carefully rubbed her fingers on the napkin. "Luke asked you to?" she questioned warily.

"Yeah." Sookie was still obsessed with the spot staining her embroidered name. "He wanted to make sure you weren't running yourself into the ground here, and so he asked me…" Her brain finally caught up with her words and she stopped, gasping in a sharp breath of realization. Her eyes flew to Lorelai's. "Oh, Lorelai, I didn't mean…Don't be mad at me, OK?"

"I'm not mad at you, Sook," Lorelai said levelly. She pushed herself back away from her desk, as far away from the food now turning her stomach as possible.

"And don't blame Luke," Sookie begged. "He's just worried about you. It's sweet, Lorelai, really. Remember how crazy Jackson was, the first time? Remember how he came after us on the front porch with my meat cleaver?"

"Oh, God," Lorelai breathed out. She stood up, taking a few nervous steps away from the desk. Her hands pushed through her hair as the feeling of dread washed over her. "He _told_ you?" Her arms tightened over her stomach, feeling sick to her core.

"No! No!" Sookie bolted up and scurried over to Lorelai, putting reassuring hands on her elbows. "No, he didn't tell me," she repeated, anxiously. "But I've been pregnant twice now, and it didn't take more than a few times of seeing you turn green in the kitchen and catching you asleep at the check-in counter for me to figure it out." Her impish grin broke out. "You're not that mysterious, lady!"

"Oh, Sookie." Lorelai rubbed at her forehead while shaking her head. "I'm so, so sorry. I wanted to tell you in some big, exciting way. I wasn't trying to keep it from you, honest. I just wanted to make the telling into some big theatrical production." She put her hands onto Sookie's shoulders and looked into her friend's warm eyes. "I didn't want you to find out like this."

"Well, I don't actually _know_," Sookie pointed out. She tried to pull her mouth down and shutter her dancing eyes. "Lorelai, are you all right? Is there anything you'd like to tell me?" she asked playfully.

Lorelai was still stunned that Luke had overstepped their unwritten rules and had tipped Sookie off. She was horrified that her best friend had found out about her pregnancy accidentally. However, she didn't want to disappoint her again, so she pushed everything aside for the moment and concentrated on the joy of what she was about to say.

"Guess what?" Lorelai lightly rested her arms on Sookie's shoulders, bending her head down to whisper into her ear. "I'm pregnant!"

Sookie shrieked with as much delight as if she was truly just hearing the news. She started bouncing in happiness and Lorelai soon followed suit, laughter pushing aside her discomfiture temporarily.

"Oh, Lorelai, that's wonderful!" Sookie gave her a tight squeeze. "I know how much you'd hoped for another baby someday! Come here and tell me everything!" She took Lorelai's hand and pulled her over to the small loveseat in the room. "When are you due? When did you know? Is Luke thrilled? Oh!" Her eyes beamed even brighter when she tumbled down onto the seat. "Our kids can grow up together!"

"Yeah, they can!" Lorelai agreed, curling up in her corner of the small floral couch, facing Sookie. "We'll be able to open our own daycare here!"

A curt rap at the door preceded Michel joylessly entering the room.

"Michel, you'd watch the kids if we had a daycare here, wouldn't you?" Lorelai greeted him, hoping to watch him squirm.

"Oh, but of course," Michel said dourly, placing a folder on Lorelai's desk. He turned and headed back out, giving very little notice to the two laughing women on the couch and deliberately keeping his gaze turned away from the creepy stuffed raven. "The babies, they love me."

"Baby crepes!" Lorelai trilled, giggling. "Baby crepes for everyone," she said then, more soberly, and Michel gave her an appraising look before he sniffed and shut the door soundly behind him.

"So…" Sookie said leadingly, leaning forward to clasp Lorelai's hands. "You knew you were pregnant when…"

"The stick turned pink in Burger King's restroom in Woodbury," Lorelai revealed.

"Oh, the new one? That's a really nice restroom," Sookie said approvingly. She sighed contentedly. "Go on," she urged, smiling happily.

Anxious to do right by her friend, Lorelai threw herself into her storytelling mode, determined to disregard the internal trepidation she felt still churning.

* * *

After Sookie left her office Lorelai tried to get back to business and ignore her smoldering irritation at Luke, but it was like trying to ignore a broken fingernail. Try as she might, her thoughts keep trying to smooth over the jagged edges. Finally she grabbed her stuff and marched towards the door, calling a goodbye to her staff.

By the time she parked next to the square and headed into the diner her irritation had flamed into a full-blown snit. She took pleasure in flinging open the door and catching Luke's shocked eyes with her angry ones.

"You. Me. Backroom. _Now!_" she ordered curtly, heading for the curtain.

She heard Kirk's sing-song voice: "Somebody's in trouble!" She heard Luke grumble "Shut up, Kirk!" as he reluctantly came around the counter to follow her.

She fueled her anger by pacing across the small room until Luke appeared. He looked at her questioningly, stepping just inside the space.

"Door," she ordered.

He sighed, complying with her request. "What's going on?"

"Oh, I just had the most fascinating conversation with Sookie," she spat at him, her hands on her hips. "It turns out she knew I was pregnant!"

Luke's forehead wrinkled. "How'd she know that?"

"Luke!" She all but stamped in foot in frustration. "How do you think she knew? You told her!"

"I did not!" he denied hotly. "I did no such thing!"

"Yes, you did!" she insisted, fuming. "You told her she needed to watch me, like I was some invalid or some character from a Victorian novel! It didn't take more than that! What in the world were you thinking?"

"That's not the way it was!" He pressed his lips together, trying to formulate his defense. "I just asked her to let me know if she noticed you overdoing it at the Inn. That's all I said!"

"But that was enough! That's all she needed to hear! She's my best friend, Luke! How could you spoil this for me?"

His head gave an angry jerk. "You could have told her at any time!" he pointed out. "Besides, I wouldn't have had to spoil anything if you'd just take care of yourself."

"I wasn't ready to tell her yet! You know that! I was still trying to come up with the perfect way to tell her but you took that away from me!" Lorelai took a moment to draw a breath, the fresh oxygen making her anger flame up even more. "And do you think I'm such an idiot that I'm not gonna take care of myself? Come on! Besides, I'm only pregnant, just like millions of other women! It's not that big of deal. I'm not dying of consumption or something. I don't need people watching over me!"

Luke took a step closer, his face dark. "It's a big deal to me! I don't care about anybody else! I care about you!"

"Well, back off!" she hotly ordered. "I don't need you skulking behind me, pulling the strings! I've had my parents trying to do that all of my life, and I certainly didn't trade them for you! You don't get to tell me what to do!"

"Funny," he snapped, "it sure sounds like you're telling me what to do all the time. I wasn't aware it only went one way."

"You know what? I can't talk to you about this anymore!" She pivoted around him in agitation and yanked open the door, striding down the shadowed hallway. She stalked across the dining room, taking wicked pleasure in hearing the sharp retorts of her high heels hitting the wooden floor, punctuating her anger in a way her words couldn't.

She was nearly to the Jeep before he caught up with her.

"Wait!" He grabbed her elbow. "You can't do this!"

She tried to shake him off, even more irritated. "Yes, I can! I need to get out of here!"

"No, Lorelai!" He visibly gulped and shook his head. "You can't just go! I don't…I don't know where the line is."

"The line?" She shook her head too, in confusion. "What line?" she snapped, anxious to be gone, away from him.

He looked past her, to some point over the hood of the Jeep. "The line where you don't come back," he painfully muttered.

She snorted in exasperation. "Where else would I go?" she demanded peevishly.

He looked at her then, his eyes soft and pleading, his lips pressed together to contain the hurtful memory, and 'Boston' floated in the air between them as clearly as if he'd actually uttered the word.

Suddenly icy air flowed into her lungs and she felt shaky. "Oh, Luke," she breathed out. She stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, closing her eyes. He cautiously placed his hands at her waist.

"I'm mad at you," she explained to him softly. "I'm really mad at you. That's gonna happen with us a lot. We've gotta be able to yell at each other, you know? You can't be thinking that every time we have a fight it's over between us. You know that, right?" She pulled back to look at him.

He sighed while his eyes darted around, trying to find words to match his feelings. "I guess I know," he grudgingly admitted. "But that doesn't stop the worry."

"You can worry about lots of stuff, Luke, but you don't have to worry about that," she promised him. Their eyes held for several long moments before she pulled away, inching once more towards the car.

"You're still leaving?" he demanded, sounding shocked.

"I'm still mad," she told him calmly.

"Where are you going?" The poor man was so confused.

She settled herself behind the wheel. "The Williams-Sonoma in Hartford. You owe Sookie some hugely expensive cooking gadget."

"Lorelai―"

"I'll be back," she told him, meeting his gaze with determination. "When I get home, we'll talk about this more. And I expect you to put up a fight," she warned him, starting the car. "So be ready. You don't get to sit there and stew in silence."

His fingers grasped the edge of the window as he searched for the right thing to say. "Be careful," he finally muttered.

"I will," she told him levelly. "I love you, Luke."

There was a long pause before he nodded. "I love you too."

"See you at home," she said lightly, and drove away.

* * *

Lorelai was immensely grateful when she at last staggered up the steps to their front door, lugging a large, awkward bag that kept knocking against her shin. She'd stayed away as long as she dared, trying to find the perfect balance between showing her displeasure and not worrying him too much. The high heels that had added so much satisfaction while she walked away from their fight had not been good shoes for a session of anger-shopping. Her feet hurt terribly and her ankles felt swollen. She was ready to drop in exhaustion.

She entered a dark, quiet house, and for a moment panic skittered through her until her eyes focused on Luke's body tensed on the couch, his feet up on the coffee table. She reached to turn on a light, her nose telling her that he hadn't made any dinner.

The small light seemed to flood the dark room and they both blinked.

"I _do_ get to tell you what to do!" he insisted, his feet landing hard on the floor. He turned to face her, the bottled up words storming out. "You don't have to do it, but I do get to tell you!"

"OK, see, when I said be ready to fight, I didn't mean the second I walked through the door," Lorelai groaned, sinking down onto the couch.

He leaned forward, obviously more than ready to voice everything he'd been pondering since she drove away from the diner. "You've got to stop thinking that you're invincible. You're not Wonder Woman! Someday every bad thing you've done to your body is going to catch up with you, and I have no desire to see it happen while you're carrying our baby. If my concern messes up your plans, then I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is!"

She hadn't expected him to be this ardent. "Where is this coming from?" she asked, flummoxed, slipping a pillow behind her back to ease the tension there.

"Where is this coming from?" he scoffed. "Gee, I don't know, Lorelai. Maybe it's coming from the night we flew to the emergency clinic because you were bleeding!"

"Luke," she protested. "That didn't have anything to do with the baby – well, except that the pregnancy hormones had flooded over everything. I'm fine. The baby's fine. I'm healthy as the proverbial horse. You know that! You really don't need to worry."

"I don't…" He rubbed his hand over his face in frustration. "I don't need to worry," he said, in a slightly mocking tone. "Do you realize that I feel like I've spent most of my life worrying about you and Rory? There's no way I can just turn it off now. It comes with the territory of loving you. I've watched you run yourself into the ground over and over again through the years. Of course I'm going to worry!"

"Listen to me." She leaned forward too, laying her hands over his knee. "I'm already in love with this baby. There's nothing I wouldn't do to protect and guard this little peanut here. Do you honestly think I'd do anything to jeopardize our baby?"

"No," he muttered, conceding that point. "But you don't always realize when you're going too far. You get all caught up in something and you don't even realize it until you're dropping from exhaustion."

She frowned and bent over, trying to loosen the straps that were digging into her ankles. "Maybe I did that when the Dragonfly first opened, but I don't have to do that anymore. I just sit back and reap the benefits now."

"Right," he said, his tone sarcastic. He reached down and pulled her legs up, positioning her feet in his lap. "And who took over Tobin's shift last week when his aunt died?" His fingers eased off her shoes and started soothing over the indentations they'd left on her toes.

She moaned deeply in approval. It was hard to fight when he was making her feel so good. "But I'm the boss. I have to make sure things keep running."

"I think that's exactly my point," he said. His hands stopped while he glared at her She rubbed her feet impatiently against him, wanting him to continue the massage.

"So what would you have me do?" she cried out, irritation starting to seep into her voice. "Not have anybody manning the desk?"

"Of course not. But you've got to learn to delegate more. Yes, you're responsible to keep things running smoothly, but that doesn't mean the only way to do that is to do it yourself."

"Look who's talking," she sniffed.

"But I'm not pregnant," he countered.

She grinned in spite of herself. "I'm trying to picture that. Do they make maternity flannel?"

He sighed and started rubbing her feet again and she leaned back in ecstasy, her eyes sliding closed. "I am sorry I tipped off Sookie. That wasn't my intention."

"She's my best friend, Luke. I'd been looking forward so much to telling her. You robbed me of that, and it wasn't fair."

He bent his head down, concentrating on his hands kneading her feet. "I thought I was your best friend," he finally said, gruffly.

She smiled up at the ceiling, not looking at him. "You're everything I could ever want, Luke, all rolled up in one convenient flannel-clad package. But Sookie gets the girl stuff you don't. We held each other up for a lot of years, during sad times and good. And this was a good that I was really looking forward to sharing with her."

His shoulders hunched over her feet. "Sorry," he muttered.

She made a tiny humming noise, letting him know that she'd accepted his apology. She lost herself in the delicious feeling of his hands massaging her feet.

"Oh!" She suddenly lurched up, her feet nearly connecting with Luke's chin while she tried to right herself.

His arms flailed, trying to protect himself. "Geez, Lorelai!"

"Sorry, sorry!" She swung herself around so that she was once again sitting on the couch. "I just thought of something that might fix this."

"What?"

"When Sookie was pregnant with Davey, she didn't exactly tell me, either," Lorelai explained, her eager words spilling out. "We actually figured it out at the same time and went running to tell each other. And then with Martha, it took Norman Mailer. So," she shrugged, still smiling, "maybe this is OK, too, that she knew before I actually got to tell her. Maybe this is just the way we do things."

Luke's eyes finally met hers. "She's happy about it, right?" he asked cautiously, remembering that Sookie hadn't been the biggest fan of their elopement initially.

"She's ecstatic," Lorelai confirmed.

He looked away again, nervously. "Are we OK?"

Lorelai sighed. She got up, moving to stand in front of him. She bent down and moved his hands, clearing his lap for sitting upon. She lowered herself and he welcomed her weight gratefully, falling back against the couch while he cradled her against him.

"You have to trust me," she told him, her voice low and direct. "You talk real purty to me, sometimes, Luke, and you say just the right things. But then something happens and your actions show me that not much's changed. You've got to trust me, Sweetie." She cupped his face with her hands and tipped it up to hers. "I love you. I'm all in. This is our home, and I'm not leaving it, ever. I'm going to be right here, with you, and Rory, and our baby, until my cholesterol-clogged arteries finally shut down."

"Don't joke," Luke admonished her, his voice husky.

"I'm not joking." She smoothed his hair back and looked deep into his eyes before she leaned down and captured his mouth. She pulled away reluctantly, letting her lips cling to his for an extra second or two. "Do you believe me?"

"Yes." His hand reached for her face, bringing her down for another kiss. "But I think it's good, maybe, that I worry. Maybe that makes sure I don't take this for granted. That I don't take you for granted."

She let the tension seep out of her while she rested up against him. "We're gonna fight, you know. That's us, Luke. The bickering and the bantering, that's always been the way we've communicated best. I don't want to give that up, you know? Because that's what I love about you. That's what makes you my Luke."

He breathed in the scent of shampoo and food court pretzels tangled in her hair. He smiled, letting his fingers massage her upper arm. "Love you," he whispered into her ear.

"Love you too," she whispered back. "Although I don't know why we're whispering."

He chuckled, shaking his head because he didn't know why either. "So what did I buy Sookie?"

"The greatest cake pan," she told him, her enthusiastic hands flying to illustrate. "It makes a castle cake. It's got turrets and a drawbridge door and everything! It would make the most perfect little girl's princess birthday cake!"

"Of course it would," he agreed sardonically, although his hand smoothed lovingly over her stomach. "What else is in the bag?"

"I got a pan for you, too. It makes a cake that looks like a huge Oreo cookie. I thought it would be perfect for Rory's birthday."

"OK," he said, not even trying to argue. "Anything else?"

The side of her mouth tilted up in a pleased smirk. "I might have found some frilly things that make the most of my new assets." Her hands skimmed over newly-expanded bustline.

His finger traced her neckline. "That you could interest me in."

"I figured." She looked over towards the kitchen, giving her chin a jerk. "Anything worth eating in there?"

His face set in challenge. "I brought salads home for both of us. They're in the refrigerator, waiting."

She moved to get up and he helped, pushing against her back. They stood beside each other, both waiting to see what happened next.

"A salad's fine," she said, her voice firm. "In case you haven't noticed, I've been eating every healthy, disgusting, green thing you've put in front of me." She tipped her head up, accepting his challenge.

He nodded, realizing she was telling the truth. "Yeah, you have," he agreed. "So let's go eat."

They wrapped their arms around each other while making their way towards the kitchen. She felt his arm suddenly tighten around her in a squeeze, telling her more than his words ever could.

She looked up at him, wondering, and he looked away from her, sighing.

"I brought you a pie, too," he admitted, his voice a loving growl.

And just like that, her world was perfect again.

* * *

**August 28, 2006**

"Didn't we just do this?"

"Yeah."

Lorelai stared up at the living room ceiling. Once again, the living room was their bedroom.

"Was I like a lot younger then?"

Luke's voice had that note of long-suffering in it that often accompanied their nighttime discussions. "Possibly. It was a year ago."

"Huh." Lorelai blinked up at the weird patterns made by the moonlight pouring through the front windows. She was wide-awake and on-edge in this familiar but yet oh-so-wrong space. "I feel like I was a different person then. Like now I'm this old grump who doesn't like her routine to be altered. Do you think it's because I'm pregnant this time?"

"Maybe." He tried to shut out the distractions in the room by squeezing closed his eyes, willing sleep to come.

Lorelai's eyes could not have been open further. Sleep was no where in her vicinity. Her head tossed from side to side. "Luke."

"What?" he asked, resigned, throwing an arm over his eyes.

"I hate this."

He was quiet for a moment. "I hate this too," he agreed.

She pushed up on her elbow, looking over at him. "Luke, I don't think I can do this again."

"Well, it's too late now," Luke pointed out reasonably. "Tom and the guys started today. Half the upstairs is torn out. We can't throw 'em out now."

"I don't want to throw them out. I want to throw us out."

Luke's eyes popped open at that. "What?"

"I can't stay here like this. Let's go."

He was fully awake now too. "Go where?" he asked, his voice a little desperate. He rose up on his elbow, too, facing her.

"I don't care. Anywhere. But I can't do this!" Her voice was filled with determination and a little panic.

He tried to sound reassuring. "I don't think it will be as long as last time. I have the feeling from Tom's new gung-ho attitude that your dad must be throwing money at him to make this renovation happen quickly. And there's no TJ this time, so that'll help move things along. We can handle it."

"I don't want to handle it!"

He sighed and tried to take a different tack. "Where would we go?"

She sat up, the sheet following her, leaving him uncovered. For a minute she thought, staring straight ahead. Finally she nodded. "How about your place?"

"My place?" He sat up now, too. "The diner?"

"Why not?"

He ran a hand over his head. "I just moved out of there, Lorelai!"

She was shaking her head even as she was cautiously feeling her way out of the bed. "I don't mean to move there. But we could sleep there, couldn't we? Wouldn't that be better than trying to sleep here in the middle of the living room every night?"

He didn't want to agree but she did have a point. "Maybe," he said grudgingly.

She found the floral lamp by the couch and turned it on, both of them shielding their eyes from the light. She hurried back to sit beside him.

"It'll be cozy," she wheedled. "And think how much time it'll save you in the morning! All you'll have to do is get dressed and go downstairs!"

He looked at her, still unconvinced.

She opened her eyes wide and willed the little pout to her lips. "Please, Luke?" she begged. She tried to look pitiful. "I really hate this."

He closed his eyes and tried to pretend he could withstand that look. They both knew he couldn't.

He held out for a full ten seconds.

"OK," he sighed.

"Yay!" She jumped up and started to grab some clothes.

"Wait. You don't mean now, do you?"

"Of course I mean now. I hate this. You hate this. I can't sleep like this. Come on, let's go! It'll be an adventure!" she cajoled, already throwing things into a bag.

"I hate adventures," he grumbled, flinging himself back down on the bed.

"But you love me!" she reminded him cheerfully.

He sighed and opened his eyes, finally capitulating by throwing his legs over the side after another few seconds. "Yeah, I love you," he grumbled. "I don't know why sometimes, but I do."

* * *

**September 21, 2006**

April sat cross-legged on her bed in her dad's old apartment, her attention riveted to the screen on Lorelai's phone. She didn't think her stepmother was feeling very good today. She'd given April her phone along with her blessing to text her friends before she'd taken her wan face into the bathroom. April had just enough Luke in her to be worried, but on the other hand she'd read up thoroughly on pregnancy, and she understood how unfairly the weight of future generations rested on female shoulders. And the prospect of unlimited texting was too good to pass up in favor of worrying.

Her attention was broken by the sound of feet coming up the stairs. Not Dad's, that was for sure. The sound was lighter. Feminine, but not Lane's. She cocked her head, listening for a moment before heading for the door.

Knuckles rapped sharply against the glass in the door, demanding notice. April's eyebrows raised in suspicion. Her lips set in a firm line before she pulled open the door.

"Yes?" she asked coolly.

The perfectly-coiffed head of the woman in front of her reared back just a touch in surprise. Her eyes ran over April and dismissed her just as quickly. "Is Lorelai Gilmore here?" she demanded.

April's first thought was to wonder if Taylor Doose had a wife she didn't know about, because this snooty woman was exactly who she would cast to play that role. Her second thought was that she'd had ample experience with women like this; those who thought they could put on last year's Jimmy Choo's and go slumming in her mother's boutique and the world at large would recognize their worth and bow down and cater to them. They didn't reckon with April Nardini, who'd gotten a double helping of fiery temperament from both her mom and her dad.

She slipped Lorelai's phone into her pocket and squared her shoulders against the visibly seething woman on the landing. "Who?" she asked sweetly.

The woman's eyes swept over her again in frustration. "I'm looking for Lorelai Gilmore," she enunciated in frustration.

April's chin tipped up even further. "She's not here," she replied, her tone ultra-polite and insincere.

The woman's eyes narrowed at her and her lips pressed together angrily. "So the cretin downstairs in the dirty apron sent me up here in error?"

April thought she'd disliked this woman on sight, but now she was sure of it. No one attacked sweet Caesar in front of her and got away with it.

"Guess so," she drawled, her hand firmly on the doorknob. "Sorry you had to walk all the way up here for nothing," she said sarcastically, nodding towards the stairs. "Have a safe trip down," she urged, not backing down an inch.

"Why you little…_hooligan_!" The woman made the word sound like the worst epithet she could utter. But she drew herself up and started to walk back down the stairs, her shoulders rigid.

April watched her, waiting. Sometimes she worried about herself; about how people just didn't scare her. Sometimes she worried that maybe she had Asperger's syndrome, or some other psychological disorder that caused her to not assimilate into society the way that she should. But not today. Today she was glad she was just the way she was.

She held her tongue until the woman's navy blue pumps touched the next-to-last step. Then she leaned over the railing, calling down.

"Now, if you were looking for Lorelai Danes, that'd be different."

She could hear the woman's shocked gasp from all the way down the steps. Her pumps turned around and she stomped back up the stairs as quickly as she could.

"You know very well that's who I meant!" the woman fumed, coming to stand in front of April again.

April shrugged nonchalantly. "Well, I didn't know."

"Go get her," was the next demand from the visitor.

"Whom should I tell her is calling?" April asked, again using that mock-polite tone.

"Her mother," the woman snapped.

_Uh-oh_. April felt her confidence slip. In hindsight she realized she should have known this woman was the formidable Emily Gilmore she'd heard so much about. "Um, OK," she wavered, backing towards the bathroom door.

"Lorelai?" April knocked against the door softly. "There's a woman here who claims to be your maternal unit, but frankly, I'm just not seeing the resemblance."

"Oh, God," she heard Lorelai moan from the other side of the door.

In a moment Lorelai hurried out, a thick terrycloth robe tied around her, blotting at her dripping head with a towel. Her face still looked ashen but she quickly wrapped her arm around April, putting herself between her mother and the girl.

"Hi Mom," she said wanly. "So I guess you two have met."

"No, we haven't," Emily fumed.

"OK," Lorelai sighed, playing along. "Mom, this is my stepdaughter, April. April, this is Rory's grandmother."

April felt Lorelai's arm tighten around her in support, and she nearly melted in gratitude. "Nice to meet you," she said meekly, this time with true politeness.

Emily sniffed at her and then turned furiously to Lorelai. "Can you explain to me what in the world is going on here? I come all the way over to your little burg to check on the progress of your building project, only to find that you aren't living there! Some incredibly unpleasant man kicked me out of your house! He had the nerve to tell me I had no business there! Then the strange woman with the gnome affliction told me to try here, but when I got here your husband's nowhere to be found and his poor excuse for employees acted like I wasn't speaking English when I asked for you. Then this disagreeable girl―" Her arm swept over April―"refused to tell me that you were here. Honestly, Lorelai!"

"You didn't ask for her right," April grumbled defensively.

Lorelai looked from her mother to April, and blinked twice when she registered the identical way each of them tilted their jaws towards the other. She sighed as she sank down on the end of the bed, rubbing at her forehead. "I really thought we told you last week at dinner. Didn't we say that we were sleeping here instead of at the construction zone?"

"No, you didn't," Emily snapped. "I certainly wouldn't have subjected myself to the rudeness I experienced this morning if I knew where to find you."

"Well…" Lorelai trailed off listlessly. "I have to get to work." Her hands loosened the towel from her head, wiping errant beads of water trailing across her cheeks. "This isn't a good morning for a progress report."

"So I drove over here for nothing?" Emily demanded.

April looked her stepmother over sympathetically. If Lorelai wasn't perky, it meant she really wasn't feeling good. She looked again at Emily Gilmore, not mature enough to cover the annoyance she felt with the woman's intrusion into their life. She tried to imagine her own mother being this oblivious and demanding, but knew it would never happen between them. She was suddenly drenched with fierce, protective loyalty towards Lorelai.

"I'll go," she stated calmly.

Lorelai's head jerked up. "Go where, sweetie?"

"I'll take her to the house," April said. "I've got almost two hours before Mom gets here. You get ready and go to work. I'll take her and run interference with Tom."

Emily scoffed, but Lorelai was seriously considering the offer. "You don't have to," she pointed out to April.

"I know." April leaned down just a bit, so she could look directly into Lorelai's eyes. "But I _want_ to," she emphasized, making her own eyes do the big, innocent thing Rory was so good at.

Lorelai's face briefly registered surprise before she grinned. "OK, Mom, there's your solution," she said briskly.

"You can't be serious," Emily sputtered, watching the girl march in no-nonsense fashion to the door.

Lorelai shrugged. "It's up to you. If you want to see the house, here's your chance."

Emily's hands went to her hips, fuming wordlessly. Her hands jerked with the arguments she wanted to make, but finally she settled at glaring at Lorelai and stalking past April and out the door.

"Don't let your guard down," Lorelai advised, giving April a wink and a smile.

"I won't," April assured her and clattered down the stairs.

She had to hurry to follow in the woman's angry wake. Emily pointed a key fob at a dark, expensive car and April heard the doors unlock. She dove into the passenger side and rushed to get her seatbelt fastened.

Emily made the car roar into life and pulled out from the curb with barely a glance to confirm the way was clear.

"Turn here," April instructed, pointing right at the first street.

Emily fixed her with a cold, hard stare. "Do you really think I don't know the way to my own daughter's house?"

"Beats me," April replied, just as coolly. "I've never seen you here before."

Emily snorted but kept her eyes on the road. In a few short minutes they pulled up in front of the house.

April led the way. She spotted Tom leaning against the stairway, his finger running over items listed on the clipboard he was holding.

"Hi, Tom," she greeted him, unfazed when he didn't react to her presence. "This is Lorelai's mother. She says it's OK if she looks around."

Tom glanced at April then, and ran his eyes over Emily from head to toe as if he'd never seen her before. "Knock yourselves out," he advised tonelessly. His head inclined briefly towards the top of the stairs. "Don't bug my guys," he warned.

"We won't," April said lightly, and clambered around him to race up the steps.

Emily glared at him regally until he finally capitulated, flattening himself back against the railing, leaving her more room to navigate past him.

"Thank you _so_ much," she said, her voice pitched to the perfect sarcastic frequency. "I certainly hope we aren't inconveniencing you."

"Doesn't matter to me," he pointed out. "I still get paid the same."

She gritted her teeth and followed April up the stairs.

She saw at once that the hallway that had previously stopped just past Lorelai's door had been lengthened and that a bathroom was being framed out. The new hall continued and the barest outline of two new rooms could be discerned from what once had been closed off attic space.

"I really don't think that this is the best location for the bathroom," she observed critically.

April shrugged. "Well, they needed to hook into the existing plumbing."

"I suppose," Emily sighed, sweeping her eyes over the room's dimensions. "It's not going to be very big."

"Doesn't need to be," April refuted. "No one's planning on living in the bathroom." She hurried into the bare wooden space on the west side of the house, looking with pleased fascination at a new window there.

Emily stepped in-between the framing, studying the spaces. "These are the two new rooms? How can they possibly be adequate?"

"They're plenty big," April reassured her, stepping over into the other room. "This is the baby's room," she informed Emily.

"It is?" Emily looked around, baffled. She shook her head. "It seems foolish to not take full advantage of this renovation. This house could be a true showcase. I just don't see how this is going to work."

"Dad says it's fine," April said firmly, "and Lorelai is thrilled with it."

"I suppose," Emily muttered. She spied something taped to the wall and walked over to it. "What's this?" she asked.

"That's the color for the paint."

"Green?" Emily sounded horrified. "Who paints a baby's room green?"

April shrugged. "Lorelai says that green is the new pink."

"What?" Emily looked at April curiously.

"I don't know, but Rory laughs every time Lorelai says it."

"Green," Emily muttered distastefully, trying to stick the paint sample back on the wall.

April came over and helped push the sample over a nail poking out. "Lorelai says that if the baby's a girl, pink will look really good with this shade, and if it's a boy, they can put blue with it, too. Besides, she says it's just the exact shade of the trees out there when they first start to leaf out in the spring." April nodded towards the new window, where she could now see the trees swaying.

Emily looked at her with a bit more interest. "They don't know if it's a boy or a girl?" she asked, incredulous.

April laughed. "Oh, they know, all right! They just won't tell us." At Emily's look she continued. "I'm like, 99% sure they found out last time at the doctor's. But they rushed me out of the room―"

"You were there?" Emily demanded, shocked.

"Oh, yeah," April said, nodding vigorously. "Lorelai and my Mom said OK, and it was so cool, Mrs. Gilmore! The technician showed me all the wires and how everything works, and she let me push around the wand thingy until we found the baby, and it was the coolest thing ever! I saw the heart beating and everything. But then when the doctor said do you want to know about the sex, they shoved me out the door." April grimaced in remembered frustration. "Do you think that was fair?"

"No, I don't," Emily said faintly. She crossed her arms and stepped into the other space. "So this is your room?" she asked, putting a brisk note into her voice.

"Yep." April stepped proudly back into the space. "This is my room-slash-guest room-slash-sewing room-slash-where Luke will sleep when he ticks off Lorelai." She grinned at Emily but lost it quickly when she saw the displeasure on the other woman's face. "Well, I thought it was funny when Lorelai said it," she tried to explain.

"How nice that Lorelai has another member for her fan club," Emily said wearily. She glanced around again, trying to estimate the size. "You seriously think this is going to be big enough for you?"

"Sure." April was once again looking out the window. "I think it's about the same as my room at home. And I'm not going to be here all the time, you know."

"I suppose." Emily sighed, brushing some sawdust off of her jacket. "Do you have a color picked out, too?"

"Oh, yeah!" April rushed over to grab another paint card leaning up against the interior wall. "I was going to do teal, because I'm really into teal right now, you know? But then Lorelai and I brainstormed, and we came up this instead." She pointed to a dark spot of navy blue on the card, but before Emily could voice the disapproval that was clear on her face, April hurried on. "We're going to paint the ceiling this color, and this one wall." She nodded at the wall behind them. "Everything else will be white. My bed will go against this wall, and we're going to hang white fabric on the ceiling and down behind my bed for a headboard. Lorelai says I can put those glow-in-the-dark stars up the on ceiling if I want, and Dad says they'll get me a telescope for Christmas. That's why they put the window here for me. It'll be perfect for that. There's a lot less light pollution here than at my house in Woodbridge. It should be truly awesome."

April could see that Emily's face had softened. "I'm sure that will be very pretty for you," she conceded. "Is it just you and your mom at your home?"

"Yeah, it's always been just the two of us, just like Rory and Lorelai," April stated.

"Your mother runs a store? In Woodbridge?"

April nodded. "She's always been really good at figuring out what people like. She has this knack for spotting trends. A lot of people drive to Woodbridge all the time just to see what she's found. And she has like, clients now, I guess you'd call 'em―people who ask her to find stuff for 'em. There are even a couple of advertising agencies who call her when they're looking for props or a certain style of clothing."

"Well, that's…fascinating. I guess I'll have to come check it out myself sometime."

April cocked her head, not able to figure out if she was serious or not. "Anytime," she said, finally.

"How long have you known that Luke was your father?" Emily asked abruptly.

"Almost a year." April looked down at her feet and watched her toes make patterns in the wood shavings there. "I didn't do it to make trouble, you know," she suddenly found herself blurting out. "It had never bothered me at all that I didn't have a dad. But it just came to me one night that I had this really kick-ass idea for a science fair project that'd knock that smug look right off Samuel Polotsky's face. I didn't think that it would upset anybody, or change anybody's life." She scrunched her hands up into fists, making herself fully confess. "I guess I was just selfish," she muttered.

When she finally looked up, Emily was staring at her, contemplating. "Everyone wants to know who their family is," she said. "I'm sure that Luke is glad that you found him." She thought a little more. "Your mother is probably relieved that she doesn't have to keep that secret from you anymore."

April thought about that, and nodded. "Actually, it's all turned out really good. Mom's even starting to date."

Emily's eyebrows rose. "Your mother hadn't dated before?"

"Not really. But she let one of her girlfriends set her up last week. She got _so_ nervous," April revealed. "She even called up Lorelai for shoe advice."

"She called Lorelai?"

"Yeah, they're like friends now," April explained earnestly.

Emily stared at her so hard and for so long that April couldn't help but fidget. "Your life has had a lot of changes during this past year," Emily finally observed.

April chuckled at that. "Yep. It used to be just me and my Mom, and sometimes my grandmother. Now I've got a dad, and a stepmom, and a stepsister, and pretty soon I'll have a new baby stepbrother or stepsister, too. And I guess…" She suddenly felt shy, but she forced her thought out. "I guess I sort of have a new grandmother and grandfather, too." She looked at Emily hopefully.

Emily drew in a breath and stood a little taller, but before she could answer they heard the front door crash open downstairs. Heavy footsteps thundered up the stairs and they heard Tom let loose a torrent of curse words.

Luke marched into the new construction area with purpose. He looked very authoritative in the dark suit that had been put on grudgingly for his meeting at the bank. In two strides he was beside his daughter, his arm around her protectively as he turned to face down Emily Gilmore.

"Everything OK here?" he asked curtly.

"Sure, Dad." April shrugged under his arm.

"We were just admiring the new space," Emily told him.

April watched her dad stare at Emily, as though he was trying to gauge the sincerity of her words.

"This will be very nice," Emily added. "It's small of course, but this space will be nice, for the baby. And for April."

April felt her Dad's grip on her shoulder relax a little bit. "We think it will be perfect," he said, and she could hear just a touch of a challenge in his voice.

"I think so too," Emily replied.

"We need to get you back," Luke said to April, although he was still looking at Emily. "Your mom'll be at the diner soon. Head down to the truck."

The three of them trooped down the stairs. At the door, Luke called out to Tom that they were leaving.

"Yeah, that breaks my heart," Tom replied from somewhere in the house.

April was nearly to the truck when she heard Emily say her dad's name. She paused and looked back.

Emily's posture was confident, but there was something in her face that made April think she didn't really feel that way. "Luke, I was wondering…" she trailed off, shook herself, and started again. "When can you bring April to Friday night dinner?" she asked firmly.

Her Dad looked alarmed. "That would depend on her mom, I guess," he hedged.

Emily's chin jutted out in the way that made April think she was used to getting her way a lot. "If Friday doesn't work, we could make it another night. But I think that Richard needs to meet his granddaughter, don't you?"

There was a long pause, and April could feel her Dad weighing his options. At last he glanced down at her. "What do you think, April? Would you like to see where Lorelai grew up and meet her dad?"

April nodded seriously at Emily. "Yeah, I would."

"We'll talk to Anna and let you know," Luke said.

"Very well. I'll look forward to it." Emily replied, moving to get into her car. "Thank you, April, for bringing me over here. I appreciated your insights."

"You're welcome," April told her, secretly delighted at the baffled look her Dad was giving her.

Right before they pulled up in front of the diner, she elbowed him in the side. "That," she told him with pride, "is the way you handle Emily Gilmore."

* * *

**October 2, 2006**

Somehow they'd managed to oversleep, and even though Luke knew that the diner was in Caesar's capable hands, he was rushing to get himself clothed and down the stairs.

He was stuffing his wallet in his back pocket, ready to slam his hat on his head, when Lorelai appeared in front of him, spinning around to show off a new russet-colored blouse to its best advantage.

"What do you think?"

"I think I'm late." Luke reached out to grab her around the waist, attempting to move her out of his way.

"No," she pouted. "I mean, about this!" She twirled again.

"It's cute," he said automatically, still going through his getting-ready checklist in his mind.

"Luke!" she complained. She pulled the material out away from her stomach. "Do you think I dare wear this?"

He glanced at her again, frowning. "Why not? It looks great on you."

"But," she sighed then, dramatically. "If I wear this, everyone will _know_."

"Know what?"

"That I'm pregnant!" she said, frustrated at his denseness. "This is an actual maternity top. All of my normal stuff is starting to not fit me."

He shook his head and took the time to actually look at her. He stepped closer to her and pulled her over to him, letting his other hand lightly mold against her slight roundness. "You look great," he said gruffly, and kissed her cheek. "But you don't need to worry. Nobody's gonna guess you're pregnant yet." He caressed her a little more before briskly setting her aside. "Now, I've got to get downstairs."

He hurried away, not noticing her look of disappointment.

Later, after at least a dozen orders of pancakes and untold cups of coffee and one fried-egg sandwich cut into diamonds for Kirk, Luke took a second to check on his wife. "You good? You need anything else?" he asked her, as tenderly as he could with half the town in attendance.

"Yeah, I'm good," she sighed, easing herself down off the stool.

"You heading to work now?" he asked, starting to clear her spot.

She nodded, and then looked at him with a strained smile. "And I guess you were right," she said sadly. "No one noticed." She pointed forlornly at her stomach, shrugging slightly as she started to turn away.

Mentally, Luke slapped himself once again. Finally, he got it. She _wanted_ people to know. She was ready to tell the town their news.

His hand reached out to grasp at hers. "Wait," he ordered, as she looked at him in confusion.

Resigned, he hurried out from behind the counter, reaching for her, watching her face open in surprise. He turned her so that her profile could be best seen by the table occupied by Miss Patty and Babette, and then he dipped her back over his arm slightly as he kissed her, making sure that his hand pulled the excess material of her top tightly over her barely distended belly.

The first voice he heard was not the one he expected.

"Lorelai!" It was Gypsy's accent that cut through all of the conversations in the diner, making everyone else stop and look. "Girl! You got somethin' goin' on under your hood?"

He brought her upright and then released her, watching as her look of shock turned into a delighted smile. He winked at her and then stepped back when a crowd of excited townsfolk surrounded them. He accepted congratulations, several pats on the back, one celebratory pinch from Patty, and his wife's silently mouthed 'thank you' before he managed to slip away to the kitchen, safe from the mayhem.

"How about we trade?" Luke asked, jerking his shoulder at Caesar's place at the grill.

"Anything for you, Papa!" Caesar said, enfolding him in a big bear hug, overriding Luke's protests.

Luke brushed off Caesar's well wishes and turned to finish up the orders cooking on the grill, but he couldn't brush off the smile that was splitting his face as he listened to all of the happy voices out in the diner.

* * *

**October 23, 2006**

Lorelai was so focused on everything she needed to do today to get them moved back into their house that she didn't even notice that Luke had stopped the truck.

"Oh," she said, embarrassed that she'd been so distracted, and moved to open the door.

Luke lunged for her. "We're not there," he said nervously. "Yet."

She looked around then, disoriented, and saw that Luke had pulled over just before turning onto their street. "What's wrong?" she asked, feeling pinpricks of worry stabbing her all over.

"Nothing," he said in a way that made her worry more than ever. He tried to smile reassuringly, which made it even worse.

"Luke!" she threatened.

"Look," he said grimly. "I was supposed to find a way to do this, OK? But I'm no good at this stuff. So here's what we're gonna do: Close your eyes." His voice was demanding and pleading at the same time.

She stared at him in disbelief. Then she laughed. "What?"

"Close your eyes." He sighed, knowing he was no match for her. "Just do it. Please, Lorelai?"

It irritated her that she couldn't figure out what was going on, and it worried her that possibly he'd done something to the outside of the house that she wouldn't like. But she dismissed that idea at once, since she'd just been there on final inspection last night and everything was fine then. She stared at his currently glum face, which she loved so much, and decided that she could humor him just this once. She grinned and obediently shut her eyes.

She heard him sigh in relief and felt the truck lurch around the corner. In no time she felt him pull the truck into the drive and turn off the motor.

His hand rested perfectly on her thigh, and she shivered, sensing his warmth. "Open 'em," he told her, his voice laced with a twinge of excitement.

She blinked them open and felt her mouth drop open in surprise. Blue and pink streamers cascaded all over the porch. A huge sign proclaimed in gold sparkly letters "Welcome Home Lorelai, Luke & Baby Danes!" Cars were parked everywhere and friends, neighbors, and co-workers could be seen scurrying up and down the stairs.

"What's going on?" she asked, overwhelmed.

Babette suddenly appeared at her side of the truck and opened the door, trying to tug Lorelai out. "Welcome home, Sugar!" she crowed.

Lorelai returned her hug, still feeling dazed. "What is all this, Babette?"

"Well, it's your baby shower," Babette proclaimed.

"What?" Lorelai looked at Luke.

"Well, it's not really a shower like you'd normally have," Babette started to explain, drawing Lorelai towards the house. "But we figured you could really use some help now to get settled back into the house, so we thought we'd arrange this and celebrate the baby comin', and later, when the little darlin' actually gets here, we'll celebrate again!" Her blonde curls bobbed enthusiastically.

As soon as she stepped through the door Lorelai could feel the energy vibrating through the house. Mrs. Skinner waved at her gaily as she ran the sweeper in the living room. Reverend Skinner was using a dustcloth on all of the pictures and knickknacks on the mantel. In the kitchen she found Liz and TJ washing dishes. April was wiping down the stairs and Lorelai took a moment to hug her as she went by. She peeked into their bedroom and saw that Patty and Sookie were putting fresh sheets on their bed. She followed the music of Culture Club to the baby's room.

Her eyes glowed with happiness when she saw that the beadboard on the bottom half of the walls had already been painted white, and that Andrew and Kirk were nearly halfway done with getting the light green paint on the rest of the walls.

Apparently something about the way she was standing there unnerved them, and they both slowly stopped painting and turned to her.

"Um, Lorelai, hi," Andrew said with apprehension in his voice. "We were told…I mean, we thought…Luke said…"

"Luke told us to paint it this color," Kirk said with authority, meeting her gaze.

"It's perfect," she told them, beaming. She felt happy tears starting to brim her eyes, and before they could fall and totally freak out the two painters she rushed into the room, hugging them both in gratitude.

The next few hours sped by as Lorelai directed and ordered and laughed. People were constantly pushing her down into chairs and propping her feet up on whatever was handy. Pregnancy stories were loudly shared. Drinks and cookies and brownies were pressed into her hands as she looked around at the whirlwind of activity and felt blessed and loved and totally, totally happy.

Luke met her eyes on one his trips upstairs with boxes and she tired to beam to him how happy she was; how grateful and how thankful she was. He raised his chin slightly and his lips quirked in that way he had, and she was pretty sure he knew exactly what she was feeling.

Everything was going quite smoothly until the moment April appeared at her side, her eyes wide with worry in a way that Lorelai had never seen.

Lorelai's legs came down off a packing box at once. "What's wrong?" she asked.

April licked her lips and looked hesitantly over her shoulder. "Emily's here," she revealed.

Lorelai shot up out of the chair. "Oh, Lord!" she breathed out, praying for the best. Resolutely she headed for the door, even more worried when she realized that April had chosen not to follow her.

"Hi, Mom," she said in greeting, crossing under the wind-blown streamers on the porch. With increasing dismay she noted that her mother was dressed in what she surely thought were good moving day clothes, which consisted of black dress slacks, a chocolate brown silk blouse, and a gray cardigan. Lorelai contrasted that with her own ensemble of old jeans, one of Luke's shirts over her now too-tight t-shirt, and a bandana holding back her curls. "What are you doing here?"

Emily snorted. "What am I doing here?" she mocked. She threw her arms out beside her and Lorelai noticed that a whole legion of men and a few women were massing in a squadron there, painters and moving men and maybe even stone masons, for all she knew. "You told me you were moving in today," Emily fumed.

"Yeah, we are," she agreed, smiling nervously. She pointed back at the streamers and the sign. "The town sort of surprised us with a baby shower/moving in party." She drew in a deep breath and looked at the workforce beside her mother. "Sorry," she said to them, "but everything's pretty much done. You're not needed."

Emily dismissed everyone with a flick of her wrist. "Submit your bills to me by Monday," she instructed them. "Goodbye, Lorelai," she said coldly, turning to find her car.

Lorelai tried to press back the frustration she always felt when dealing with her mother. She looked heavenward, hoping that maybe having a minister and a rabbi currently inside the house might tip things over into her favor for once.

"Mom, wait," she said, sighing deeply. When Emily didn't stop, Lorelai hurried down the steps. "Mom, you came clear out here. Don't you want to see how the house turned out?"

Emily stopped but didn't turn around. Lorelai approached her cautiously. "Mom?"

Her heart clenched when her mother turned and Lorelai could see how hard she was struggling to hold back tears. "I just don't understand why you will never let me help!" Emily's breath was ragged, and for once she just couldn't seem to stop the honest words from coming out. "Even when you were a little girl, just four years old, you wouldn't let me help you dress your Barbie! You'd sit on the floor with that damned stubborn look on your face, insisting on tearing your doll limb from limb rather than let me help you with it! All these years, and nothing's changed! Why is it so hard for you to let me help you?"

Lorelai's instinct was to hug her mother, the way she normally would hug Rory or April if they were in distress. But this was her mother, and Emily had never encouraged hugs, but rather had always seemed to disdain any display of affection, so she stood close by instead and hugged Luke's shirt around her for protection and guidance.

She let a few moments of silence go by while Emily gulped for control. "Mom," she said finally, her voice gentle, "if I'd let you help me dress Malibu Barbie, would you have let me put her in her disco dancing dress?"

"That tacky outfit was the only thing you ever dressed that poor doll in," Emily huffed. "It wouldn't have killed you to put her in a ballgown every once in a while."

Lorelai was quiet again for a moment. "I think we have our answer," she pointed out.

Emily angrily whirled her arms around at the commotion of people and vehicles. "You let them all help!" she hissed.

"But they aren't trying to take over. Were you going to let me paint the baby's room green?" she asked, already knowing the answer.

Emily bit her tongue for a moment. "I picked out a beautiful pale yellow," she finally admitted.

Lorelai sighed and counted to ten. Several times. She crossed her fingers and hoped for the best. "I'd let you help if I trusted you to listen to what I want. But you always think that you know best. You never hear what I'm telling you."

Emily scoffed at her daughter. "And how do you think I feel? Why does everything have to be such a struggle with you? Why can't you ever listen to any of my ideas? It might be that I have something of worth to offer you!"

Lorelai focused off into the distance, absently stroking the soft flannel covering her arms. "You and Dad made it possible for us to get the house ready for the baby, and Luke and I are so grateful for that. And the way you've welcomed April into your home and into the family…Well, Luke would probably do anything you'd ask him to right now. He's incredibly touched. We both are. And when you do those things, it just shows me that we _are_ capable of having this wonderful, adult relationship. I don't want to keep fighting with you, Mom." Lorelai turned and faced her mother, putting it all on the line. "Isn't there some way that we can figure out how to listen to each other?"

Clouds now covered the sky and the air temperature had cooled. Lorelai noticed her mother pulling the sleeves of her cardigan down over her hands. "I wish you would just hear me out sometimes, Lorelai, before you automatically dismiss what I'm saying. I feel like you completely shut me out." Emily swallowed hard. "It hurt when you were a child. It hurt when you left with Rory. And it hurts now."

Lorelai nodded, accepting her mother's feelings. "And I think that since I left home at 17, that's how you still see me. You don't trust my opinions as an adult because you didn't see me grow up. You need to accept that I know what I'm doing. You need to believe that I'm happy with my life just the way it is."

"You've made so many mistakes."

"Yes, I have," Lorelai admitted easily. "But I've learned from them. Good things have happened to me, Mom. It hasn't been all bad."

Emily sighed, her glance backwards taking in the decorated house full of friends. "I guess that's true," she had to concede.

"So," Lorelai said, "how about if I try harder to listen to you, and you try harder to trust the decisions I make?"

She could see Emily wavering, the hard exterior that she always kept visible to the world starting to soften. "Will you let me help you sometimes?"

"I'll tell you what. I'll even ask you for help, as long as you promise to not sneak behind my back and try to do things your own way." Lorelai stuck out her hand. "Deal?"

Her mother thought it over before offering her own hand. "Deal," she agreed.

Lorelai shivered, rubbing Emily's cold hand. "Come on. It's freezing out here, Mom. Come in and see the house. Meet our friends. And…April's here!" she said, as a final enticement.

"All right. For just a minute," Emily conceded.

Lorelai turned towards the house, smiling, and led her mother inside.

* * *

**October 31, 2006**

"Come on, Luke! We're married now! You have to do Halloween with me!"

"Huh. I must've dozed off during the vows. I do not remember pledging to trick or treat together," he said, pulling on his boots to go back to the diner.

"It was there, I'm sure of it. You just don't remember. I'll call Sondra right now if you want me to. I'm sure she'll back me up."

"Lorelai, I gave Caesar the night off to go to his sister's party, and everyone else wants to go to Patty's." He knew she knew that. They'd been over it a hundred times in the last few weeks.

"You let me pull sausages out of you last year," she pouted.

He walked over and gave her a hug, even though she resisted him. "That's because you were sad last year," he reminded her softly. "I'm glad you're not sad this Halloween."

"No, I'm not sad this year," she said, sharply. "This year I'm mad because my husband won't do Halloween with me! Come on, Luke," she tried to coax him. "Just close the diner. How much business do you do on Halloween, anyway?"

"People like to stop in after the kids are done with trick or treating. Or they like to stop before they head to Patty's. I don't mind staying open for them."

"No, you don't mind doing that for them! You don't want to disappoint your customers! Disappointing your wife, though, that's another story!"

Luke started to walk to the door. "Lorelai, I'm tired of this discussion. I'm tired of arguing with you. I'm not closing the diner; I'm not staying here with you; I'm not dressing up. If you want to come over and see me after you've passed out all the candy―or eaten all of the candy, whichever comes first―I'll be happy to walk over to Patty's with you for a little bit. That is, if you dare to walk outside dressed like that." He cast a critical eye over her getup again. "What are you supposed to be again?"

"Luke" she whined in exasperation. She pointed to her lacy fingerless gloves and the dozen or so crucifixes hanging around her neck. She'd even found a frizzy blonde wig. "Madonna, Luke! You know, Like a Virgin?" She pointed to the pillow she'd attached to her middle. "See, Like a Virgin, only I'm obviously knocked up! Get it?"

Luke sighed and shook his head. "I'll save you a piece of pie," he said, his hand reaching for the door.

"Are you telling me that you're actually going to go―"

When she cut off her sentence so abruptly Luke turned to see why and anxiety hit him right in the gut. Lorelai was standing absolutely still, tensed as though she was listening to something only she could hear.

"What is it?" he asked, his voice vibrating with fear. He tried to look past the ridiculous wig and the painted on beauty mark to see the real Lorelai.

She held up her hand, shushing him, still breathlessly contemplating something apparently wondrous, judging by the look on her face.

He grabbed her elbows. "Don't shush me!" he threatened. "What's wrong?"

She looked at him then, her angelic smile totally at odds with her outfit. "Nothing's wrong," she assured him. She reached under her lacy skirt and pulled out the pillow, then swiftly grabbed his hand and pressed it to her real baby bump. "The baby's kicking. Harder this time. I think you might be able to―There! Did you feel that?" She looked at him triumphantly.

He found he couldn't answer. A miracle had just kicked at his hand.

He cleared his throat and kept his hand pressed into her, scared to breathe lest he disturb the little being that was so gently and rhythmically kicking at his hand. Finally the little pushes stopped when the baby either moved or had grown tired of putting on a show. He feathered his lips against Lorelai's forehead, unable to even whisper a response for a very long time.

"Wow," was all he could say when his voice finally came back.

"I know! Cool, huh?" she cried out, delighted. She'd thrown her arms around his neck when he first pressed against her, and now she hugged him, hard. "That was a lot more definite than the little Q-Tip pokes I'd been feeling. Lil' Peanut's getting stronger!" She swayed back and forth as she hugged him. "I'm so glad you were here to feel that!"

He felt his mouth moving as he tried to think of some words―any words―that would adequately describe the elation he was experiencing, but before he could even try the doorbell rang.

Lorelai gave him a quick, excited kiss and opened the door.

Of course it was the Banyan boys. They always jumped the gun on the official trick or treating hours.

This year they were dressed as pirates. "Trick'r'treat," the oldest one mumbled, and all three of them held out the dingy pillowcases they were using to collect their loot.

Lorelai quickly dropped a generous amount of candy into each of their bags and they fled to the next house. She kept the door open and looked at Luke. "You'd better get going," she told him, rubbing his arm affectionately.

"I…I don't really need to go," he blurted out. "I'd rather stay here with you."

"No, you need to go," she told him. "You're right about staying open. Stopping at the diner is a Halloween tradition for a lot of families. I know that. I was just being a brat before. Go," she told him, smiling.

He stared at her beautiful, angelic smile and thought that she looked a lot more like the real Madonna, not the one who wore her underwear on the outside of her clothes.

"I don't want to go," he complained, clinging to her in full sight of the trick-or-treaters dashing down the street.

She laughed at him then, pushing him playfully away from her. "It's OK, Luke. Go. I'll come by after I get done here." She leaned forward, whispering to him. "And I'll let you feel me up all you want to." She looked down, pointedly, and he saw that his hand was once again pressed to her belly.

He pulled his hand away reluctantly and started slowly down the steps. "All right," he grumbled. Once he was on the ground he turned back to say one more thing.

"I'll be careful," she said, beating him to his traditional warning. "I won't even wear the boots," she promised, pointing to the short white ones with the spiky heels she'd found for tonight. "I'll wear my Working Girl sneakers instead."

"I'll see you a little later," he said, wondering how in the world people could just go on and do their everyday things when life was full of such incredible joys. "You'd better get your stomach back in place," he advised, motioning to a group of very short cheerleaders heading their way.

"Thanks, Babe," Lorelai said, and turned away to quickly tuck the pillow back under her skirt. Luke listened to her voice exclaiming over the cheerleaders as the little girls giggled. He walked down the street, every now and then examining his hand where he still could feel the baby's little kicks.

* * *

**November 22, 2006**

"I don't know why I do this every year," Luke complained.

"You do it because you love it and you wouldn't have it any other way," Lorelai told him.

"I'm exhausted," he groaned. "And tomorrow will just be worse. And Friday I'll have to be up at the crack of dawn for all of the crazy shoppers going out to find Tickle Me Elmos."

"Poor baby," Lorelai commiserated. "Com'ere." She plopped herself down on the couch and motioned for him to put his head on her lap.

He sighed tiredly and stretched out on the couch, using what was left of her lap for a pillow. She instantly started to stroke his neck and shoulders, rubbing the tension out of them. He sighed again, but this time it was for pleasure.

"I know you're tired, but you love doing the Thanksgiving thing," Lorelai murmured to him soothingly. She turned on the TV and found the station showing the Garfield and Charlie Brown Thanksgiving specials. "And this year's going to be great. Rory'll be here, and she's bringing Paris along, and you just know that's going to be a good time. And Jess is coming, and I have to admit, I'm even looking forward to seeing him. Liz and TJ will be there." She stopped rubbing a moment as she frowned. "I'm a little worried about what my mother might say to Anna, but I figure Anna can hold her own, and April will be on guard."

"Mmm," Luke agreed, starting to doze off. He relaxed against Lorelai, loving the feel of little feet or hands shoving against the back of his head as Lorelai rubbed his shoulder and neck. Eventually the movements against his head became little rhythmic bounces and he knew that the baby had the hiccups. He smiled, letting himself drift off as Lorelai softly sang and repeated the dialogue along with the cartoon characters on the screen.

He wasn't exactly asleep but he wasn't awake either, when a commercial came on and he heard someone say 'Christopher.' The name hit him like a shot and his body jerked, trying to get away from it and all of the bad memories it dredged up. Lorelai gently soothed him, and he realized he hadn't thought of Christopher Hayden in a very long time, not even as Rory's father. He hadn't thought of him nor the tragedy he'd nearly caused for months now. He didn't start the day thinking about what had happened back in May or the heartbreak they'd endured. He didn't think about it at all anymore.

The show came back on and his ears picked up a little of the dialogue. Gratitude, they were talking about. What they were grateful for.

_Lorelai,_ he thought at once. _I'm grateful for Lorelai, and this baby, and this home. I'm grateful that April decided to find me. I'm grateful that Rory is finally really my daughter. But mostly it's Lorelai. Without her, I wouldn't have anything else. I'm grateful that she forgave me and gave me a second chance._

And suddenly he realized how often he'd been irritated at Lorelai over the years; angry at her, furious even, for giving Christopher a another chance, time after time after time. He remembered thinking she was foolish for going back to her parents' house, trying yet one more time to reconcile with them. He thought about how she'd welcomed Rory back so joyfully, even when the girl had broken her heart. With a start he realized that it was Lorelai's boundless forgiveness, her ability to always be generous with second chances, that made up a large part of her character. She understood what it was like to make mistakes. She understood how important it was to be forgiven.

Cold, breathtaking fear, the stuff found in nightmares, seeped into him as he finally comprehended how close he'd been to losing everything he was now so grateful for. If Lorelai hadn't been who she was, she would have turned her back on him. She'd never have given him a second chance. Without her there'd be no baby; no home.

There would have been no forgiveness.

There'd be no love. No warmth. No happiness.

His heart pounded in fear as he clutched at her legs, still half-asleep and drenched with terror.

He slowly became aware that the TV was muted and that Lorelai was shaking him. He gulped in some air, trying to dislodge the clinging fear. He turned in her lap, looking up at her worried face.

"Tell me what it is," she begged him. "Is it your heart? Are you in pain? Do you want me to call 911?"

He shook his head, trying to find some words. She bit her lip, looking panicked, and kept wiping his face. After a few moments he understood that she was wiping away his tears.

He blinked hard, several times, trying to get himself under control. He grabbed her hand and brought it his mouth, kissing it tenderly.

"Luke, tell me what's wrong," she begged him again, nearly crying herself.

He pushed himself up onto his knees beside her, enfolding her in his arms, straining her to him. "I love you," he choked out.

"I love you too," she said, bewildered, "but―"

"No," he said, easing his embrace enough that he could see her face. "I love you so much, Lorelai. I love everything about you. Even the things that drive me crazy. I love every bit of you. Do you understand?" He searched her expression, hoping she did, and then continued on slowly, trying to find the right words. "I wouldn't have things any other way. Even the bad things we've been through, we needed them, too. We wouldn't be here without them. We wouldn't be the same people without them. So I know it's crazy, but I'm grateful for the bad stuff, too. But mostly, Sweetheart, I'm grateful for you. I can't thank you enough…" His words choked off for a moment, and he looked down, fighting again for control. "Thank you for loving me."

She stared at him for a long time, her mouth opening and closing as she tried to sort through the landslide of words he'd sent over her. He could see that she was still scared to death that he'd had some sort of psychotic episode. He could sense that she was still contemplating calling in some medical help.

He shook his head and smiled at her, still blinking away some of the damned tears. "I'm OK," he croaked out, and gave her a kiss against her temple. "You've made me crazy from loving you, but I'm OK."

She smiled a little at that, and cuddled against him. "I'm crazy in love with you, too."

"Good," he sighed, and leaned up against her, letting his eyes sink closed. He put his arm around her to hold her close, letting his fingers slip through her hair that was silky straight today. He knew she didn't really understand the epiphany he'd just experienced, and right now he didn't have the strength to explain it to her any better.

But someday…Someday he'd come up with a way to make sure she knew what was in his heart.

* * *

**A further note: **When this chapter was first posted, I was taken to task concerning Lorelai's anger when she learned Luke had inadvertently tipped off Sookie about the pregnancy, because some readers felt her reaction to his slip was OTT. Well, as someone who had something very similar happen in real life, let me tell you, she was completely justified in feeling the way she did. I managed to hold my tongue, but believe me, I wanted to throw a fit so big that Lorelai's display would have paled in comparison. Letting Lorelai give voice to all of the things I wanted to yell about but didn't dare was very satisfying!

And apparently I love April. And Tom. Who knew?


	11. The Last Christmas Present

_Hope you're ready for a happy Christmas chapter in the middle of June!_

* * *

This had possibly been the best Christmas ever.

Luke added one more log to the fire that had been burning for most of the day. He put a hand to the small of his back, rubbing a sore spot there, when he straightened up. He gave no credence to the folktales that expectant husbands shared symptoms with their pregnant wives. The fact that his own back began hurting at the same time that Lorelai started walking around with one hand permanently pressed against her tailbone was just a coincidence.

His eyes ran over all of the Christmas debris displayed on the mantel: cards and pictures, candles, wayward ornaments, all congregated around Desmond the duck. Desmond now sported a festive Santa hat in just his size and a bright red bow around his neck. As was his habit, Luke patted him on the head before heading back to crash on the couch, lazy with a Christmas hangover.

And the best part was he knew it wasn't quite over yet.

He settled down into a corner of the couch, his eyes half-closed, and thought about how completely different this Christmas was from the one he'd suffered through a year ago. Last year he was frozen in place, terrified of telling Lorelai about April, terrified of trying to be a dad, terrified that his whole world was about to come crashing down. And indeed it had, mostly due to his own stupidity. He could only shake his head and groan now at the mistakes he'd made.

But this Christmas…This Christmas was perfect.

His lips curled up, smiling involuntarily as his eyes closed, replaying the highlight reel in his mind.

Rory had come home on the 23rd, and Anna had dropped off April that evening, so that she could spend the night and they could have the entire Christmas Eve day together. Anna was apologetic that April couldn't stay longer, but she'd already made plans with her mother for Christmas Day. They assured her that was fine and they'd sent her back to Woodbridge with a box of Weston's sugar cookies, a sweet token that proved how well the whole April thing was now going.

Luke had made them stuffed French toast in the morning and then they sat down to watch "It's a Wonderful Life," something that Lorelai and Rory insisted was tradition in their household. Amid much grumbling, Luke left during the movie to go check on the diner, and the girls walked over to meet him there for lunch. Then they all came back to the house to open presents.

Luke sighed now, remembering the unbelievable amount of mess that had littered the living room floor within 20 minutes' time. He didn't want to see what happened next year when a toddler was added to the mayhem.

He'd held his breath when April opened her box from the Gilmore's. Her own breath caught in her throat and her eyes grew wide when she pulled out a monstrous book on astronomy and a few star charts. When she opened the book, already starting to shriek with joy, an envelope fell out onto her lap. Frowning, she opened it, and then sat immobile, until all three of them were starting to worry.

"This is…this is…this…" She gulped, unable to add more words. Helplessly she handed the piece of paper to Luke.

He read over the letter written in Richard's hand quickly. It seemed that Richard had been able to pull some strings―or more likely, Luke figured, had written a check―and had finagled a behind-the-scenes tour of the Yale planetarium for April, which he would be honored to escort her on after they returned from their holiday trip to St. Croix.

Rory had gotten a glass of water for April, then sat next to her and patted her shoulder, trying to calm her down. Luke and Lorelai exchanged a look. They'd found out only the week before that Richard and Emily had started a college fund for April. They'd both been worried that the Christmas gift was going to be something more over-the-top than the planetarium trip, because April had totally infiltrated the hearts of her new grandparents.

Once April had sufficiently recovered, Rory dragged over a huge box, her present to her new sister. Inside was all of Rory's old Harvard paraphernalia, plus anything that the Yale marketing people had managed to get their name on, and buried at the bottom, Princeton stuff. This made both girls weak with giggles, and when April at last pulled out what looked to be a ferret dressed in a Princeton t-shirt, both of them fell to the ground in hysterics.

Luke and Lorelai looked at each other mystified, but they were grinning, too. They loved that their girls had jokes and secrets between the two of them that didn't include the parents. They loved seeing that they were developing a relationship of their own.

Later, April had carried a slim box over to Lorelai. She snuggled down against her stepmother's side and watched Lorelai eagerly tear off the wrapping paper in her trademarked style.

"Oh, April," Lorelai said, her voice strained, as she lifted the lid and caught a glimpse of what was inside.

April leaned over her and picked up the delicate braided bracelet, anxious to explain it to her. "See," she said, pointing to one of the three charms dangling from the silver chain, "this one is an opal, so that's for Rory. And this one's a diamond, so that's for me."

"We have a good month," Lorelai critically observed, but her voice still sounded choked.

"And this last one," April rushed on, "it's aquamarine, for the baby." She looked at Lorelai, suddenly appearing shy. "Mom helped me pick it out, but it was my idea."

"It was a great idea," Lorelai told her, barely holding on to her composure. She put out her wrist and motioned for April to help her put it on.

Rory came to Lorelai's other side for a better look, and as the girls leaned forward, both using Lorelai's expanding stomach as a makeshift ledge, Luke had managed to grab the camera and get a shot of the three of them.

Later they'd once again trekked to the diner for what Lorelai and Rory insisted was a traditional bowl of Christmas Eve chili. Luke helped shut the diner down, and then they all went outside to view the town's Christmas pageant in the square.

Afterwards they'd driven April home, the girls singing along loudly to the Christmas carols being played on the radio. Luke smiled a little now, his eyelids still closed. There may have been a male voice joining in during some of the choruses.

Today they'd slept late, eaten coffeecake for breakfast, opened more presents, and viewed the Christmas Day movie playlist: "The Muppets' Christmas Carol" and "While You Were Sleeping," They'd briefly left the house to take over presents to Davey and Martha, but other than that they were stuffed and content couch potatoes. The girls had even stayed in their pajamas all day.

Lorelai's pajamas suddenly appeared in his peripheral vision and Luke had to cut off his reminiscing. Over the last week or so she'd suddenly become Pregnant with a capital P. Not that she was huge; it was just suddenly glaringly obvious that she was very pregnant. She inched herself in front of the couch and Luke sat up and put his hands reassuringly on her hips, guiding her down to a landing on the couch. The baby's bulk was throwing off her center of gravity and making it hard for her to navigate.

"So how's it going in there?" he asked, motioning towards Rory's room. Tomorrow morning they were taking her to catch a flight to London, and Lorelai had been supposedly helping her to pack.

"Pretty good, I think," Lorelai sighed, instantly putting her feet up on the coffee table by Luke's. "She's gotten really skilled at fitting as much inside her carry-on as possible."

"I wonder how bad traffic will be," Luke worried, picturing the post-holiday crowd.

"Yeah, listen," Lorelai said urgently. She peeked back over her shoulder, then leaned in towards Luke. "I think maybe she's going to break up with him," she whispered.

"What?" Luke's feet came down off the coffee table.

"Shhh," Lorelai warned him. "I don't know for sure. It's just a feeling I'm getting from stuff she's said."

"Like what?"

"Just…" Lorelai shrugged her shoulders. "I think she's wondering if Logan is really the type of guy she wants to spend her life with. It sounds like he's maybe starting to hint at long-term, and I'm not sure she's ready for that. Anyway, I'm kind of thinking that this trip may swing her one way or the other."

"Wow," Luke murmured. "I didn't expect that."

"Well, I could be wrong," Lorelai pointed out. "But I think this has been brewing since Thanksgiving, when she talked to Jess for so long."

"Jess!" Luke's voice rose again, and Lorelai shushed him. "You can't be serious!" he said softer, but still vehemently. "You think that the two of them are still interested in each other?"

"Maybe not romantically," she hedged. "But I know she's really proud of what Jess has accomplished. And I think she's comparing his life to Logan's." She shrugged again. "And I could be misreading this whole thing, and she'll come back from London engaged."

"Don't say that," he growled.

"Well, it's always possible." Lorelai laid her head on his shoulder.

He bent his head to rest against hers, and for several minutes they sat quietly, enjoying the fire and the Christmas lights. He played with the silver bracelet that had yet to be removed from her wrist.

"You know, I'm kind of hurt," he said to her gently, squeezing her shoulder.

Her head jerked up and she looked at him. "Hurt? Why?"

"Well, you've always told me what an evolved sense of gift-tracking you've been blessed with. Yet you've left one of your gifts over there. It makes me think you don't want it, and that hurts my feelings."

She turned to look at him more fully, and he had to force himself not to laugh at the face she was making, half-concerned and half-suspicious.

"There are no more presents over there," she insisted, although she glanced over towards the tree doubtfully.

Luke gave a shrug and rested back against the couch. "If you say so."

"Luke!" She pushed herself to the edge of the couch and turned to study his smug face. "You know Rory scoured the gift-giving area under the tree with my supervision. There are no more presents!"

"Whatever." He spread his arms along the top of the couch, giving her an injured look. "If you don't want it, you don't want it."

She growled, starting to leverage herself off the couch. He leaned forward to help, pushing against her back. She took a few steps, then turned back to glare at him. "I swear, if this is some sick joke, just to get the pregnant woman to waddle across the room again…"

"Hey, it's up to you," he said innocently. "If you want the present, you'll have to go look."

She made another growl of protest but walked over to the tree. She walked around the three accessible sides, peering under it as closely as she could.

"There's nothing here!" He smiled at her irritation. "Rory made sure she pulled everything out this morning!" But still she looked.

"Luke!" she protested again. She studied him, and the look on his face told her plainly that she was missing something. In a huff she turned back to the tree. "You're not seriously going to make me get down on the floor, are you?"

"Look straight ahead," he told her gently.

She did, and right in front of her face was a tiny white box, tied to a branch with a red ribbon.

"Oh," she said, feeling foolish and pleased at the same time. She untied it and came back to sit next to him on the couch.

Once again he helped her to sit and then he scooted forward, wanting to have a better view of her face when she opened the small box.

She smiled at him, holding her breath in anticipation. She slid off the ribbon and eased off the top of the box. For someone who was known for her stellar unwrapping skills, she was taking her time with this present.

The lid popped off and Lorelai stared down into the soft white cotton batting cradling her engagement ring. Three fingers of her left hand came up to press against her lips and she looked at Luke with huge, liquid eyes.

That was his cue, and he slid down to his knees in front of her. He put his hands on her knees, rubbing them gently. He never took his eyes away from hers.

"Lorelai, I was wondering if you'd marry me."

He watched her struggle for an answer, knowing that she was debating going with sappy or lighthearted.

She took away her fingers and cleared her throat. "Well, I hate to break it to you, but I'm already married."

He nodded, taking her hands in his. "When we got married, we did it because we had to." He saw something that looked like regret flash through her eyes and he hastened to explain. "It had nothing to do with the baby. I admit that's what I thought at the time, but I was wrong. We had to get married then to save ourselves. It was the only thing we could do to stop the pain we were in. It was killing me to be without you, and I know it was killing you, too. Getting married was what we had to do, don't you see?"

She nodded, too. "Yeah," she said, quietly.

"But now we're…we're healed," he said. "And I'm…I'm so happy. You've made me so happy," he whispered to her "All of that stuff we went through, all of that bad stuff, I don't even think about it anymore. It's past and done with. But lately I keep remembering what you said to me the night before we got married, about how you hated yourself and how I should always remember that when I look at you. I don't want to think that ever, Lorelai. I don't want you to hate yourself. It's over. It's done. It's past. I want you to let it go. I don't want that dark spot to still be there between us. I want us to move on from here. I want us to get married this time because we're happy. So, will you marry me?" he asked her again.

She stroked his face and his hair, studying him. "Are you saying that you forgive me?" she finally asked, haltingly.

He shook his head, looking briefly down at the floor as he drew in a sharp breath. He squeezed her hands when he looked up at her again. "I forgave you so long ago I don't even know when it was," he told her. "Probably the same night we started this," he said, lightly rubbing her belly. "What's important now is that you forgive yourself."

Her face contracted as she tried to hold back tears. "That's hard," she said, brokenly.

"I know," he agreed. He pushed up on his knees to embrace her. "But you're strong," he whispered into her ear. "And I'm here to help you."

He pulled back to look at her. "Are you going to make me beg?"

A laugh burst out of her, breaking her pensive mood. "I wouldn't turn it down."

"Please," he teased. He leaned forward, wrapping her in his arms again. "Please, please, please." The last 'please' was whispered against her ear, followed by a kiss. "Please."

She sighed contentedly against him. "Do you mean you want to do like a vow re―"

He squished his hand over her mouth. "Don't use that term," he said firmly.

"Sorry," she winced. "Are you saying that you really want us to have another wedding? Is that even legal?"

"I don't know, but I don't why it'd be a problem. We're not trying to marry anyone else."

She shook her head. "This is so unlike you. You hate crowds and being in front of people and being the center of attention. You really want to do this?"

"I really want to do this. I'd stand in front of the whole town every day and repeat those vows to you, Lorelai. We didn't get to share it before, and I want to celebrate with April, and your parents, and Jess. With everyone. I'm happy. That's something I never really thought I'd be, but I am. I think that deserves a party."

She laughed at his earnestness. "OK. When should we schedule Wedding Number 2?"

He was ready with the answer, having giving it a great deal of thought. "June 3rd."

Her laughing stopped. "Seriously? June 3rd?" she asked, grimly. "Why not just wait until June 30th, and make it our first anniversary party?"

He shook his head. "June 3rd _is_ our first anniversary. It should have been our wedding day. Instead, it turned out to be the start of our reconciliation. This way, we'll remember it as a good day."

"June 3rd," she mumbled, doubtfully.

"June 3rd," he stated, with determination. "The baby will be here. And you'll probably be able to wear your perfect dress by then, if that's what you want. Or we'll get you another one. I want you to plan the day exactly the way you want." Luke placed his hand on her stomach and got kicked for his try at tenderness.

She leaned forward and kissed him again. "Come on up here. Your knees have got to be killing you by now."

"You haven't said yes yet," he pointed out.

Her eyes danced. "What was the question again?"

He pretended to sigh. "So much work," he grumbled. "OK." Another huge sigh. "Lorelai." He kissed her. "Will." Another kiss. "You." Kiss. "Marry." Kiss again. "Me?"

"Yes," she sighed against him, blissfully.

"Thank God." He pulled himself back up onto the couch with a groan. "Give me your hand," he said, picking the ring up out of the box.

But instead she pulled her hand away, her eyes suddenly shifting away nervously.

"Don't," he ordered, reaching for her hand. "Don't go back there. Don't remember the night you took it off. Just look at me, Lorelai. Remember this," and he slipped the ring back onto her finger.

"Oh!" She gazed at it rapturously. "It's so pretty! Look, Luke! Isn't it pretty? It looks like it was meant to go with this wedding ring."

"It's pretty," he agreed, soberly. "But I'm sorry, Lorelai. I should have given it back to you a long time ago."

"No regrets," she reminded him. "And this was perfect, the way you gave it to me tonight. This makes this Christmas even more special."

They sat and cuddled for a long time, feeling the baby kick and discussing wedding plans.

Suddenly Lorelai sat up. "Does Rory know?"

"Nope," he said, proud that he'd managed to keep a secret in this house.

She threw her arms around his neck, gave him a quick kiss, and then struggled to her feet.

"Rory!" she demanded loudly, heading across the room. "Come see Mommy's last present!"

Luke leaned back against the couch, letting his eyes close again, preparing his ears for the shrieks that were sure to come.

No doubt about it. It _was_ the best Christmas ever.


	12. Twisted

**Author's Note #1:** For those of you who have read this story before, there's a special note for you at the end of the chapter.

**#2:** Thanks to all of you who have been so encouraging and supportive about this story. It's greatly appreciated! And don't worry, if I'm not posting, it's usually because I'm working on something new. A special hug of thanks to **Nancy,** who wrote such a lovely review on the last chapter. Since you signed in as a guest, I can't PM you, but I wanted you to know how much what you said warmed my heart!

**#3:** And last but not least, a big thank you to** Eledgy**, my incredible writing buddy. Thanks for holding my hand and coming through with such great suggestions! I owe ya!

* * *

There was a strange car parked where Lorelai's should have been.

For just a moment Luke scowled, thinking that Lorelai didn't need unexpected company. And then he felt foolish. Once again he'd forgotten that this strange red van _was_ their car.

He'd tried to convince her for months that they needed something other than the Jeep once the baby came. Lorelai insisted that the Jeep would be sufficient. Finally one day in late January he simply handed her the new baby car seat and told her to try it out. He watched from behind the living room curtain while she struggled for 45 minutes to fit it into the backseat. It practically killed him not to go out and help her, but he was starting to understand the whole 'tough love' thing. When her patience ran out she stormed inside, throwing the seat into a corner of the foyer before stomping upstairs. At dinnertime she came back down, polite but distant, and made no mention of her failed attempt at car seat installation. The next morning Gypsy phoned him at the diner, saying that she understood they were looking for a family-friendly car and she knew a guy in Middlebury with a great deal on a used van.

By the end of the week the van was home with them and the Jeep had found a new parking place on the far side of the garage. Privately, Luke didn't think there was any need to keep the Jeep, but he understood Lorelai's attachment to the vehicle, and he'd also learned how to pick his battles. The Jeep could live beside the garage for now and everyone was happy.

Luke pulled the keys out of the truck's ignition and pocketed them as he quickly stepped down to the ground. He expertly skirted the melting mounds of late-February slush as he hurried to the porch.

Sookie had called him about thirty minutes ago, letting him know that she'd sent Lorelai home to take a nap, and amazingly, Lorelai had meekly agreed. The baby was due in just a few weeks and that uncharacteristic behavior was alarming enough for Sookie to tip him off. He hadn't asked her to, either. He'd learned his lesson about that, too.

He entered the quiet house and immediately scanned the living room. She wasn't on the couch, and the kitchen was unoccupied, so he tiptoed up the stairs as softly as he could.

The door to their room was ajar. He pushed it open just a little bit further until he had a clear view of her asleep on the bed, a pillow squished up against her side to help cushion the load. A confusing mix of love, panic, fear, and sympathy flooded over him as he watched her trying to get the rest that eluded her at night. Between the heartburn, the regular trips to the bathroom, and the baby's penchant for doing Rockette-worthy kicks every time she tried to drift off, Lorelai wasn't getting much sleep. Nightly he rubbed her back and tried everything he could think of to help her find comfort, but he understood they were in the homestretch now and there wasn't much he could do. But still, her weary face troubled his heart.

He watched for a few moments longer, not able to contain a grin. Lorelai had taken to wearing one of his shirts while she was at home, and right now the blue-plaid flannel was bouncing over her stomach because the baby once again had the hiccups. The grin faded when he realized just how tired she must be, if she was able to sleep through the little earthquakes shaking her belly.

With a sigh he turned and headed back downstairs as quietly as he could. He stood in the living room for a few minutes, unsure of what to do next. He didn't want to leave her here alone and go back to the diner, but on the other hand, she was fine, and he didn't want her to catch him hovering, either.

He paced around the room a few times, jingling the car keys. Finally he stopped beside the desk. He decided he'd write a note and leave it on the bedside table with her phone, saying simply that he'd stopped by and that she should call him if she needed anything at all. Or maybe he should just say to call him with her dinner request. He nodded. Yeah, that was better.

He was still searching for a pen when he thought he heard a car outside. He turned to the window and caught a glimpse of the Prius.

A huge smile broke over his face. An unexpected visit from Rory would rejuvenate Lorelai like nothing else. Plus, she'd be here to watch over her mother, and he could go back to the diner with a clear conscience.

He pulled open the door just as Rory was climbing the steps.

"Hey, stranger," he grinned at her. "This is a nice surprise!"

She nodded at him, but didn't smile. She pushed her hair back behind her ear, in that same nervous gesture her mother used. Her eyes skittered over the porch and back to her car, anywhere but to his face.

"What's wrong?" he asked, instantly sober. He put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing it. He tried to get her to look at him. "Tell me what's going on."

"Oh, Luke." She put her hands over her face, briefly, before once again looking nervously back over at her car. "I didn't know what to do. You need to know. Mom needs to know, but I don't want to upset her. I just…I didn't know what else to do." She finally looked at him, and the edgy look in her eyes at once put him on protective alert.

"We'll fix it," he told her automatically, trying to draw her inside. "Come on, it'll be OK. Whatever it is, just tell me, OK?"

She pulled away, resisting his attempts to get her inside the house. Once again she looked apprehensively towards her car, so he looked too, and was surprised to see that someone else was in her car.

Luke watched the passenger unfold himself from the car. He shook the wrinkles out of his expensive coat and slowly walked around the front of the car, scanning the neighborhood casually while he headed for the house.

Luke felt his body seize with shock. His jaw tensed and his hands automatically clenched into fists at his side. He turned to Rory, seething.

"You brought him here?" he hissed.

"Luke." Rory tried to find the words to explain, helplessly shaking her head.

"Hello, Luke," Christopher said in his usual trying-to-be-charming way, climbing up the steps as though he had a perfect right to be there.

"You will not enter this house," Luke growled like Gandalf, planting himself firmly in the middle of the doorway.

Christopher quirked an eyebrow at that. "Oh, it's _your_ house now, is it?" he asked, sounding amused.

"Yes!" Luke snapped. "And you are not welcome here. Ever!"

Christopher put his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels, smiling. "We'll see about _that,_ I guess."

Luke continued to growl and took a step towards him but Rory blocked him. She put both hands on his shoulders and tried to push him back. "Luke," she said somewhat desperately, "remember that no matter what, he's still my dad."

Luke glared, but had to concede that point.

"You've got to listen," Rory urged him. "You've got to hear this, and then you've got to decide if Mom can hear it or not. I know she's got to sometime, but I don't want to tell her right now if you think it would be too much."

"Tell Mom what?" Lorelai's cheerful voice suddenly came from just inside the doorway. "Oh, I think I recognize that navy blue coat! Could it be my own long-lost daughter?" she asked, playfully dramatic. She poked Luke in the ribs as she made her little joke.

"Hey, Kid!" she cried out, delighted, trying to peer around Luke's shoulder. They all heard her gasp a split-second later. "God," she choked out, stunned. "Christopher."

Working together on some psychic level, Rory instantly spun around and she and Luke met shoulder-to-shoulder, blocking Lorelai as much from view as possible.

"Good to see you, Lor," Christopher said in a lazy, sweet way, as if he'd just seen her a few days ago.

"Her name is Lorelai," Luke blazed out at him. Geez, that nickname bugged him!

"Hey, she's been Lor to me since we were G.G.'s age," he told Luke with a self-deprecating grin. "No way could I keep myself from calling her that. I mean, that's who she's always been to me."

"You need to get out of here now," Luke seethed, taking a step.

"Luke, once again, he's my dad, remember?" Rory turned partway, putting a cautionary hand on Luke's arm. "And besides, you need to hear this first."

"_Yowzer._" Christopher had caught sight of Lorelai's figure. His hands went to his hips as he studied her roundness, shocked. He laughed a little, shaking his head in disbelief. "Yeah, I can see that my little prank really tore up your lives. What, you managed not to touch each other for a full 24 hours afterwards?"

Luke made a sudden lunge towards him but Lorelai threw an arm around his shoulder. "Don't!" she warned, and Luke stopped in his tracks, still glaring.

Christopher's mouth dropped open, spying the rings now visible on Lorelai's hand. "And they're married?" he questioned Rory, confused. "Why didn't you tell me that?"

"Yes, we're married!" Lorelai said desperately. "So just go, Chris, please!"

Christopher was still staring at Rory, trying to figure it out. "You made it sound like this was a big deal. Looks to me like they're just fine. What's all the drama about?"

"You slimy sonofabitch," Luke said precisely, folding his arms tightly across his chest. "You have _no idea_ the pain you've caused."

"Dad," Rory cut in, bluntly, realizing that time was running out. "Just tell them."

He studied Rory for a moment, then put his hands back in his pockets, rocking back on his heels. "Fine," he said, shrugging. "Nothing happened," he said, with one of his 'aw, shucks' smiles on his lips.

Lorelai's hand tightened on Luke's shoulder. "What are you talking about?"

Christopher shrugged again. "That infamous night in Boston that apparently got blown up into some huge deal. Nothing happened."

Lorelai glanced over at Rory, trying to read her anxious face. "I don't understand. Are you just saying that because you think it's what I want to hear, or something?"

He rolled his eyes. "No, I'm saying it because it's the truth. Nothing happened," he said again, sighing.

Lorelai took a step out from the doorway, pushing herself between Luke and Rory. She was shaking her head. "I don't know what you think you're trying to pull!" she said, becoming irritated. "I was there, remember? You can't go all conveniently revisionist on me now!"

"You don't remember though. Do you?" he questioned her gently.

She looked at him for a long time before slowly shaking her head.

"That's because there isn't anything to remember, Lor," he explained. "You came to my door in extreme pain, because of Mr. Wonderful here. I medicated you with tequila, just like the old days. You matched me shot for shot and pretty nearly cried yourself sick. When you couldn't hold your head up anymore you crawled down the hall to bed. I sat on the couch and downed a few more in your honor. I crashed on the couch and didn't wake up until Nanny got there in the morning."

"But that's not…" Lorelai stared at him, trying to evaluate his words and expression. She worried her lips and shook her head stubbornly. "In the morning…I was…and you were…G.G. _said_," she pointed out, her voice tormented.

"Well, yeah, in the morning, all bets were off." He still was giving her his charming, rakish smile, the one that always served to get him out of scrapes. "You weren't drunk and crying over this jerk anymore. I thought maybe it would be possible to convince you that you had other alternatives in the morning."

Luke flinched and Lorelai drew in a sharp breath. "Are you telling me the truth?" she demanded.

"Why in the world would I make up that nothing happened?" he demanded back.

"I don't know," Lorelai said, slowly. She studied him some more. "Nothing happened," she repeated faintly, trying out the idea.

"Nothing happened," he confirmed once again. "Thanks, though, for thinking that I'm such scum-bucket that I'd try to take advantage of you like that. I can't tell you how good that made me feel," he chastised her.

Luke wondered if this was what it felt like, to be in shock. His brain seemed to be lagging several steps behind the conversation, and his chest didn't want to allow enough air into his lungs. "But why would you lie like that?" he asked, trying to make sense of it. "Why would you do that?"

"First off, I _didn't_ lie. Not actually. Lor assumed the worst and I chose not to correct her. And secondly, _why_ did I do it?" He looked at Luke smugly. "I did it because in that split second, when she jumped out of bed all horrified, I realized I'd stumbled on a way to keep her away from you! And as far as I was concerned, that's exactly what she needed to do."

"Why would you want to hurt her like that?" Luke could barely comprehend what he was hearing.

"Me? _Me_ hurt her?" Christopher gave a sarcastic laugh. "I wasn't trying to hurt her! I was trying to _help_ her! Keeping her far away from you was the best way to help her! When she came to me that night I didn't even recognize her, you had her so broken. She wasn't the same Lorelai anymore. You'd turned her into some poor, colorless creature, scared to even say boo. I couldn't stand to see her like that. And then, boom! The next morning I realized I'd found the one way to make sure Mr. Self-Righteous wouldn't get close to her anymore. I knew you wouldn't want anything to do with her if you thought she was damaged goods. Tell me," he wondered, turning to Lorelai, "did he kick you to the curb as soon as he found out?"

"Chris," she cautioned, still reeling.

He spun back to Luke, sticking his chin out in a superior way. "What I don't understand is how you could be stupid enough to think she'd cheat on you in the first place!" He shook his head at Luke. "That night, even though you'd destroyed her, she still wouldn't say anything bad about you. She just kept sobbing about how you didn't want her anymore and somehow that was all _her_ fault."

The fight had all gone out of Luke. "Because… she told me so," he muttered, staring at the floor. He glanced quickly over at Lorelai, wetting his lips. "And I saw her eyes. Her eyes always tell me everything." He rubbed a hand over his own.

"But why did you let this awful mess go on for so long?" Lorelai insistently asked Chris. At the same time she put a comforting hand on Luke's arm. "If this was some sort of…of a…_scheme_, when you knew it didn't work, why didn't you tell me?"

Christopher shrugged. "Rory said you guys were back together anyway, so I figured it hadn't made any real difference. Why bring it up?"

"Why bring―" Lorelai started to scoff. Luke shook off her hand, his anger back.

"I don't understand you. I've never understood you, and thank God I don't, because I wouldn't want to be anything like you! You're always proclaiming how much you care about Lorelai, but yet your actions always harm her! You've never tried to take of her! You've never tried to protect her! You don't care how much she gets hurt! No, it's fine if she's hating herself, just so good ol' Christopher can try to get his way!" Luke suddenly flung an arm over to where Rory was standing, pale and quiet. "And then there's your daughter, somebody you never give a damn about at all! How do you think she's felt for all of these months?" He tried to ignore the overwhelming desire to cross the porch and rip Christopher's well-coiffed head off of his body. "How can you be such a constant selfish bastard?" he asked heatedly.

"Whoa there. Calm down!" Lorelai wrapped her arm around Luke, got him to turn to face her. Her eyes were glowing and her mouth was gently curving into what he always thought of as her 'angel smile'―something that didn't grace her face very often. Her luminous serenity drew him in; calmed him enough to hear her. "Luke," she said, her voice wrapped in sheer delight, "I didn't do it!"

"I know," Luke gulped, "but he―"

"Doesn't matter," Lorelai insisted. "What matters is I didn't do it! I didn't do it! I didn't do it!" She was giddy with joy and tried to jump up and down, but the baby put a stop to that. She looked at Luke, her face shining with relief, as her arm cradled the baby inside her.

He blinked into her happy eyes and tried to reach for her, but Rory got there first. She raced over to her mother, hugging her tightly.

"It's all OK now, right?" Rory's voice was muffled against Lorelai.

"Yes, Sweets, it's OK," Lorelai confirmed, her eyes still locked onto Luke's.

He stepped closer to them, wanting; _needing_ to be with them.

Lorelai moved her head from nuzzling against Rory's to Luke's shoulder. She looked directly at Christopher. Luke felt her draw in a huge breath.

"Thank you for coming here today. Thank you for telling us the truth. But now I don't want to see you or hear from you or even hear _about_ you for a really, really long time. You should leave, Chris. Now."

Chris opened his mouth to protest but Luke beat him to it.

"That's it?" he fumed, angrily stabbing his finger at Christopher. "He gets off once again scot-free? He doesn't have to suffer any consequences for what he did?"

Lorelai's gaze shifted to her daughter's stony glare, which was directed at her father. "He's not getting off scot-free," she assured Luke, softly. "He doesn't even realize what he's lost here today."

"We'll all laugh about this someday," Christopher grinned. "You'll see."

"Get in the car, Dad!" Rory's voice wrapped 'dad' in several layers of exasperation. "Get in the car now!"

Christopher sighed and reluctantly turned to exit the porch. "We'll talk later," he said lightly, giving a backwards wave to Lorelai.

"No we won't," Lorelai said staunchly.

"Mom," Rory started, once her father had left the porch, sounding distressed.

"Come inside," Lorelai suggested, and all three of them stepped over the threshold into the house. Luke shut the door and they all breathed in the tranquility of the foyer.

"Oh, Mom, I'm so sorry!" Rory wrung her hands. "I made a deal with Dad that the only way I could be around him was if we didn't talk about you. I told him that I'd voluntarily tell him if you were OK, but that was it. I didn't want him to know about the baby or about you being married, because I was afraid he'd just make more trouble if he knew. But maybe if he'd known, he would have told the truth sooner! Oh, Mom, I think this was my fault. I'm so sorry!"

"Aw, Rory!" Lorelai hugged her troubled daughter. "Nothing that happened was in any way your fault! It's not your fault that your father usually can't see beyond his own nose!" She tipped Rory's face up. "Thank you so much for bringing him here and making him tell us the truth. I know it wasn't easy to stand there and listen to that. You're a good kid!" She said the last words in a heartfelt whisper while squeezing her as tightly as she could with the baby being in the middle.

Luke patted Rory's shoulder as she pulled away from Lorelai. He cleared his throat, trying to get his runaway emotions under control. "Are you going to be OK in the car with him? We could always call a taxi or something," he gruffly offered.

Rory's chin came up. "I'll be fine," she said confidently. "Believe me, there are still some things I want to say to him."

"That's my girl," Lorelai said in approval.

The air hung thick between Luke and Lorelai as soon as Rory left. They warily entered into the living room, and Luke collapsed onto the couch, leaning his head back against it.

"He's right, you know." He spoke immediately, his words drenched with the wretchedness he felt. "I _should_ have known. I should have known you wouldn't cheat on me."

"Don't." He raised his head to see that Lorelai was directly in front of him, awkwardly leaning over her huge baby bump to tenderly stroke his face and arms. "Don't do this. I believed it, too, remember? I'm the one who made you believe it."

He sat up straighter and pulled at her arms, wanting her to sit on his lap.

"No." She reared back, shaking her head regretfully. She stroked her ever-expanding belly. "Two-Ton Tillie here, remember? I'd break your legs."

"I can take it," he manfully insisted, still pulling at her. "Just come here, for a little bit. I need to have you close right now."

She carefully lowered herself down and he wrapped his arms around her at once. "I'm so, _so_ sorry. I'm sorry I doubted you. I'm so sorry, Lorelai." He buried his head into his own soft flannel shirt that was covering her, clutching her to him, trying not to think how close they came to losing each other.

She hummed some soothing noises and took off his cap so that she could run her hands over the back of his head. "You have to remember, we'd gotten to the point where I _believed_ I'd cheat on you. Things weren't good, Luke."

"No," he was forced to agree. He remembered just how bad it had been. He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his head against her, listening to her heart. He rubbed his hand over her and felt the baby move. He tried to focus on the here and now.

She was silent for a space of time; a long time, for Lorelai. "What do you think would have happened, if I hadn't gone to Boston? The next morning, you still would have shown up here with the truck packed, right? You still would have been ready to elope, right?"

"Sure," he nodded.

She pulled back a little way so that she could look at him. "And I would have said yes, you know. There's no way I could have resisted. So we would have run off to Maryland and gotten married."

"I guess," he weakly confirmed.

"Yep, we would have run off and gotten married, but we still would've had all of our problems." She shook her head sadly. "We still wouldn't have talked about any of the things that were wrong. We still would've had the April thing, and the problem with Anna. I would've still been sad and heartsick, trying to cover up everything that was bothering me."

He could only nod, knowing it was all true.

"If we would have gotten married then, you know we'd be miserable by now. Possibly even divorced. It would have been a huge mistake to get married then. We needed something to shake us up; to make us confront our problems. We needed to lose everything and build it all up again from the beginning."

"So you're saying he did us a _favor_?" Luke was incredulous.

"No, no, not at all," Lorelai calmed him. "What he did was so self-centered and, unfortunately, so true to his character. That's Christopher, only living in the moment, not thinking about how what you do today can come back to bite you later. But look at where we are now, in spite of his crazy scheme! We still found a way to forgive each other; we found a way to make a happy life with each other. I'm not sure that would have ever happened otherwise."

She traced over his face with her fingertips, and he watched her eyes darting over him. "No matter how many awful things we still may have to face in life, we know where we stand," she told him. "We've already conquered one of the worst things life could throw at us. And…we're happy," she summed up, grinning. She giggled and bounced on his knees. "_If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!_" she sang, clapping her hands enthusiastically.

He had to smile. She always made him smile. "That we are," he agreed, pulling her to him for a kiss. He kissed her as tenderly as he could, wanting her to know just how much he was in love with her, not just in this moment, but always.

"The one thing I don't understand," Luke said slowly, when his blood pressure began to drop to normal levels, "is how you can forgive him for this. He nearly ruined our lives. Aren't you angry? How can you not want to rip him apart?"

She sighed and took her time replying. Luke could tell she was carefully choosing her words. "It's not that I'm _not_ angry at him," she finally mused. "It's just, what good would it do? He's not evil. I know him, Luke, and as misguided as it was, he didn't do it to hurt me. In some weird way that only made sense to him, he _did_ believe he was helping me."

"_And_ he thought it might help him to have a chance at you again," Luke grumbled.

"Yes," Lorelai admitted, sighing again. "That is the Christopher way. And I promise, from here on out, he will always know where the boundaries are. He will never get any sort of mixed signals from me again. You trust me on that, right?"

"Of course. Always." He rubbed her back, knowing just where it probably hurt.

After a moment Lorelai started to chuckle.

"What?"

"This is like the best day _ever_!" she enthused. "Seriously, Luke, every day I've wished that somehow that night could just be erased, and today I actually got my wish! How often does that happen?"

"Not often," he agreed, mentally vowing to at least attempt to let Lorelai's unremitting sunny view of life influence his own normally grumpy outlook.

"OK, Two-Ton," he said then, "time to move. I can't feel my legs."

"Nice," she hissed at him, affronted.

He chuckled and slid down on the couch, holding out his arms for her to cuddle on her side in front of him. Pleased, she spooned herself into him, and he put his hand on her stomach. His warmth apparently calmed the baby, and all three of them started to drift off to sleep, exhausted from the drama of the afternoon.

"Luke," Lorelai whispered drowsily, and he pulled her tighter against him, rather than speak. "This feels _so_ right. It feels _so_ good."

He soon fell asleep, with her contentment settling over him like a blanket.

* * *

**A Note to Previous Readers:** When I began going over this story again, I was surprised at how sinister and nasty I'd written Christopher in this chapter. That wasn't my intention. Maybe it was my inexperience with writing and my desire to provide some drama showing through. In any case, I felt the need to tone him down and try to bring him back around to the usually clueless, but still charming Christopher we knew from the show; the one who wouldn't see that his little deceit would cause such harm to the woman he always professed to love. Please forgive me for what I saw as most necessary editing!


	13. Legacy

Outside snowflakes swirled through the early gray morning as a strong March wind caught them and hurled them around the building. Luke watched the people far below him bend into the fierce wind as they fought their way into work. The wind and the stinging snowflakes didn't bother him from his viewpoint on the 8th floor. He was cushioned snugly in an overstuffed easy chair, filled up with warmth from the inside out.

In his arms he held his son.

He'd worried, just a little, that he wouldn't be up to this task. He worried yesterday when Lorelai's water broke and he knew that the waiting time was over. He worried late last night when they'd driven to the hospital, Lorelai's patience finally at an end. She'd been determined that she was going to have the baby, _now_. And sure enough, as soon as they had gotten here, her contractions sped up and within an hour they were calling for the doctor. Her horror stories regarding her lengthy labor with Rory notwithstanding, this little guy had slid out with a minimum of fuss. He'd looked around, scowling, ("Just like his Daddy!" Lorelai had pointed out), sighed, and then had cuddled up on Lorelai's chest, going back to a satisfied sleep.

Even as he marveled and rejoiced and thanked God, he'd harbored a little pocket of worry. Then they handed the baby to him, and he didn't worry anymore.

It seemed that his arms had been made to hold his son. They weren't too big. They weren't too rough, or clumsy. His arms had known instinctively just how to cradle him. He'd known just how to tuck him against his chest. He just knew.

And now he watched, as his son slept in his arms. He watched the fuzzy blue blanket rise and fall over his tiny chest, amazed at the miracle of breathing. His index finger rubbed over the perfect little cheek, touching softer skin than he'd ever imagined. He traced over the impossibly minute fingers, each with its own even smaller fingernail on the end.

He was head-over-heels in love with this perfect little baby boy. His heart was melted completely.

A movement made him look towards the bed. Lorelai's bright eyes blinked at him.

"How long was I out?" she asked softly.

"Not long," he assured her. "Maybe an hour…" he glanced at the clock. "Maybe two," he admitted, having totally lost track of time.

"I didn't want to sleep that long," she pouted. "I didn't want to miss anything."

"You needed the rest," he reminded her.

"How much has he grown?" she demanded. "Have you already signed him up for Little League?"

"Not yet," Luke smiled. "Maybe tomorrow."

"Hmm." She leaned back, satisfied. "Did you get a hold of everybody?"

"Yeah." The baby startled in his sleep, and Luke rubbed his hand over the little blue knitted hat on the tiny head, comforting him. "Rory said she had to go to her first class, but she'd email the rest of her professors and be here as soon as she can. She can't wait to meet her brother."

Lorelai smiled. "You make the prettiest picture," she told him, pointing at her two guys. "Was Rory mad that we didn't tell her he was coming?"

"Maybe a little," Luke conceded, "but I think she's just happy he's here and you're OK."

"And she didn't have to deal with any of the creepy hospital stuff," Lorelai speculated knowingly. "She's a lot like you with that."

"I did OK," Luke pointed out.

"Yeah, you did good," Lorelai agreed. "Did you call my parents?"

"Your parents will be over later, probably after your mother cleans out the Babies 'R Us Superstore in Hartford. She made some comment about _finally_ knowing if she should buy pink or blue."

An evil grin graced Lorelai's face. "It didn't hurt her to have to wait."

Luke grinned back. "I called Anna." he continued. "April had a big math test today, so she's not going to tell her until after school, but then she's going to bring her straight over here. Anna said to tell you she's really happy for us."

"I'm happy too," Lorelai said with conviction.

Luke looked from the bundle in his arms to her. "Are you ready for him?"

She held out her arms eagerly. "I thought you'd never ask."

He carefully raised himself from the chair and slowly made his way across the small space to her bed. Gently he slipped the baby from his arms to hers.

"Hey there, Handsome," Lorelai crooned, stroking her baby's face.

"Do you feel good enough to move a little bit?" Luke asked.

She looked at him suspiciously. "What do you have in mind?" she questioned, wiggling her eyebrows.

He rolled his eyes. "I just want to…Can you move forward a little bit?"

She smiled and nodded, and he helped her to scoot down the bed just enough so that he could get behind her. He angled his long legs off to the side, pulling her back against him. He wrapped his arms around hers that were holding the baby. He sighed with pleasure.

"This is what I've been waiting for," he said softly into her ear.

She rubbed her head back against him. "This is nice," she agreed. "It may even be perfect."

They basked for a moment in their new little family unit, wanting for nothing.

"So Sookie is probably baking a cake and making a 7-course meal right now," Luke told her, continuing to fill her in on his phone calls. "She said she'd spread the word for us."

"Good," Lorelai murmured. All she really cared about was currently in her arms.

The smitten new parents watched their son with amazed intensity. They held their breaths when his little mouth opened and closed.

"So cute," Lorelai said. "So soft. Did you ever feel anything so soft?"

"No," Luke agreed, once again letting his finger stroke the little cheek. "How did you do it?" he asked, suddenly.

"What?"

"Let Rory go." He swallowed hard. "I'm already so protective of him. I can't imagine letting someone else hold him. I can't imagine letting him out of my sight. How can I possibly let him climb on a jungle gym? What am I going to do the first time someone's mean to him? How can I stand it when some girl breaks his heart?"

"Oh, Luke," she chuckled. "It's not easy. At least we'll be able to commiserate with each other when he goes through the rough patches. And as for the letting other people hold him, I know it's hard to believe right now, but there will come a day when you'll be ecstatic that someone else wants to take care of him for a while."

"Not gonna happen," he said stubbornly.

"Just wait," she laughed.

Once again the baby stirred and they watched him raptly, only breathing again when he settled back into a sound sleep.

"Lorelai." He sighed against her hair, not sure how to start talking about what else was on his mind. "Did you ever think…" He trailed off.

"What?" she prodded.

He sighed again, knowing she was probably going to make fun of him. "It's just…if Paul Anka hadn't died that night…" He felt her stiffen in his arms, and he tightened his grip around her. "I mean, it was such a coincidence. June 3rd."

"Yeah," she whispered sadly.

He nodded. "He passed away, and you called me. If he hadn't died that day, I don't know how long it would have taken us to finally talk to each other again. I mean, we're both pretty stubborn."

"And we were both pretty hurt," Lorelai added, quietly.

"Yes, we were." He closed his eyes, relishing the feel of her against him. "But you called me, and I came over, and we ended up making this little guy." He opened his eyes and smoothed his hand over the baby.

"We did," she confirmed, with awe in her tone.

"So sometimes I wonder…" Luke trailed off again, uncomfortable with what he was about to say. "I mean, it's such a miracle that it all turned out the way it did. And he was such a weird dog. Sometimes I wonder if he…if he _planned_ this."

"Luke," she chided him. "I'm the one who makes up fantastical stories, not you."

"I know," he said, ducking his head.

"Silly," she teased him, but fondly.

They were perfectly happy to gaze at their little miracle until someone tapped on the door. A nurse popped her head in.

"Everything OK in here?" she asked.

"Great!" Lorelai told her.

"Aww, so cute!" She said, taking in the sweet picture they made. Luke started to get off the bed, but she stopped him.

"No, stay right where you are. Do you have a camera?"

"In the bag there on the stand." Luke nodded towards it. "In the front pocket."

The nurse found the camera and quickly tried to get the shot.

"Oh, yeah, I bet I look great," Lorelai grumbled, even as she smiled for the picture.

"You look like a mommy in love with her new little boy," the nurse told her firmly, and snapped the picture.

"Thanks," Luke told her as she put the camera back down.

"My pleasure. I was wondering if you had a name picked out? If you do, I can go ahead and get all of the birth certificate stuff filled in."

"We do," Luke said at once. "His first name is Samuel."

"That was Luke's father's middle name," Lorelai informed her.

"That's nice," the nurse said, grabbing up the clipboard she'd laid down in order to take their picture. "Is it spelled the usual way? S-A-M-U-E-L?"

"Yes," Luke said.

"Middle name?" the nurse continued.

"Paul," Lorelai said. She looked backwards over her shoulder, just enough so that she could wink at Luke. "That's my father's middle name."

And little Samuel Paul Danes opened both of his deep blue eyes, scowling at his parents as they had their little joke. He sighed then and relaxed, one eye slowly closing and then opening again.

Almost as if he was winking back at them.

Almost as if he was in on the joke.


	14. Odds'n'Ends

Well, this story has reached the end, but I did find some things lying around in the Danes' household that I thought you might like to see!

* * *

**Jacob's Fine Jewelry**

**1772 Harbor Drive**

**Havre de Grace, Maryland 21078**

BILL OF SALE

Ship to:

Mr. Lucas Danes

c/o Luke's Diner

126 Main Street

Stars Hollow, CT 06942

Item Shipped:

One (1) 14 KT White Gold Diamond/Sapphire Eternity Band

**We appreciate your business!**

* * *

_Miss Lorelai Leigh Gilmore_

_Miss April Marie Nardini_

_and_

_Master Samuel Paul Danes_

_Invite You_

_to a Celebration for Their Parents_

_Lorelai and Luke_

_On Sunday, June 3rd, 2007_

_5:30 P.M._

_at the_

_Dragonfly Inn_

_Stars Hollow, Connecticut_

_Join Us for_

_Music*Dancing*Chicken Kiev_

_*Lots of Love*_

_Plus a Reading of His Own Work_

_By Author Jess Mariano_

* * *

Ms. Sondra Kennedy

Clerk of the Courts

Municipal Building

Havre de Grace, MD 21078

June 4, 2007

Dear Sondra,

I don't really expect that you'll remember us, but you married us last year on June 30, and you told me to write to you on our first anniversary. Yesterday wasn't really our anniversary, but it should have been, and in some ways, it was. We had a big party and everyone had a good time, even my husband, Luke, who normally is as anti-social as they come. We were married again by a minister _and_ a rabbi, and if that wasn't good enough, Luke and I repeated as much of the vows as we could remember from when you married us. If repetition guarantees success, I think we'll be married for at least a hundred years.

When you married us, you said that every couple that comes before you has a story to tell, and that was certainly true in our case. Our story would have taken us all day to tell you, partly because we have a really long history, and partly because I like to talk a lot. Luke and I had known each other for a really long time and at first, we really didn't like each other. Now I think it was probably just Unresolved Sexual Tension (UST). Then we got to know each other better, and we became pretty good friends. It took us eight years (!) but one day Luke asked me to waltz and that was all it took for me to look at him in a whole new way. But soon it seemed like every time we got to the point where it should have been easy, some new obstacle got in our way. And we were two stubborn people who were too scared to really trust anyone else in our lives, so every time we ran into a problem we tried to solve it on our own. You can probably guess that didn't work, and even though we knew we loved each other, it finally got to the point where the problems seemed insurmountable and the love got ignored. We both thought we were finished. Heartbroken, but finished.

Unexpected circumstances pushed us to Maryland and to you. On the day we stood before you, we'd only had a couple of days of honest talking under our belts. The words you said to us, and the words you had us repeat to each other seemed to be made just for us. I truly believe they started us on the road to being healed. You reminded us that we'd started out as friends. I think we'd forgotten that somewhere along the line. Once we'd repeated those promises to each other it got easier to work on our relationship. Communication wasn't such a foreign concept. The barriers that had been protecting two separate people came down, and we became a true couple for the first time.

So I wanted to thank you for marrying us and to let you know that we've made it this far. I'm confident that I can write to you again in 25 years and say the same thing.

I also wanted to introduce you to the "Unexpected Circumstance." His name is Samuel Paul Danes, and he was born on March 6th. I've enclosed a picture. As you can see, he looks just like his Daddy. He is loved to pieces by his two sisters, his grandparents, his aunt and uncle, his cousin, and by all the crazy people who live in our small town. He's a lucky little boy. And Luke and I are the luckiest people on the planet.

Thanks for gluing us back together.

Gratefully yours,

Lorelai Danes

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_Thanks for reading! See you at the next story! DFC_


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